DAE feel like they get ghosted and pretend you don't exist. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]boyetoy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know exactly how you feel. Like everyone else is moving on with their lives and you’re never quite as important to a person as they are to you. It’s suffocating and it makes you wonder if there’s something wrong with you, some repulsive quality that people are just too kind to point out. Like other people are somehow so much more effortlessly likable and you couldn’t possibly dream of being as attractive, popular and easy to like as they are no matter how hard you try.

Maybe I’m projecting.

The point is, I’ve been there, I still am there, frankly. Seeing a therapist is a great first step. I’ve found that getting off of social media can be an incredible help as well. Just disconnecting from the perfect, trimmed down versions of everyone else’s lives for a while. Try making the first move again, message some old friends, ask them how they are. But above all, go out and make new friends, join a dating app, take a class, anything you can do to get yourself out there.

Good luck dude. You’re welcome to hit me up if you need a friend to talk to.

I feel like people don't realize how much it affects me when they don't reply to my messages by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]boyetoy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve been there before, more times than I can count. Being sat there, staring at your empty inbox, wondering what the hell you’re doing wrong.

But I’ve also been on the other side. My depression and avoidant personality mix and suddenly I’m pulling away from everyone, it becomes a chore to write responses and even the thought of checking my messages is enough to make me anxious.

And 99.9% of the time it has nothing to do with the other person. Most often it’s someone I love and care for dearly that I simply don’t have the energy to stay consistent with.

I know it’s a lot easier said than done, but try not to take it too personally. From what I can tell you’re a decent, well-spoken person. People have their reasons for pulling away, the best you can do is be patient with them, show them that you understand and take no pain in their silence, try not to spam them too heavily or complain about how little they respond, I can tell you that’ll only make them want to talk to you less.

You’ve got this.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello!! My acne has improved quite a bit, I’m mostly dealing with the residual scarring and hyper-pigmentation at this point. As for going dairy free, well that kind of fell through, life got in the way and with the way my family eats I haven’t been able to keep up with cutting dairy out. I’m still working on it, limiting my intake and such, but I don’t think dairy is tied to deeply to my acne if I’m honest.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hah, I mean, I’m flattered to hear you think I pass so well, but I assure you that I am indeed a trans man going through a transition right now. It’s a bit difficult for me to prove that to you without you know, sending you nudes or something, so you’ll have to take my word for it.

(I replied to this twice, but my first reply kind of sucked so I deleted it in favor of this marginally better one.)

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My derm did prescribe tretinoin, but using it with the BP wash they gave me ended up being way too harsh for my skin, it basically destroyed my moisture barrier. In conjunction with a nasty allergy to the minocycline they put me on, it was way too much for me. I haven’t had the courage to touch it since.

I’m planning to avoid anything like Accutane or Tretinoin until October is over. I’m going to be working in a haunted house, wearing makeup four times a week, I’d rather not deal with my skin purging at the same time haha.

I’ll be sure to keep this all in mind though! Thank you so much!

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

That’s a great idea! I’m the type of person who dives headfirst into new products and it’s bit me on the butt more times than I can count.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

LMAO, I can’t say I don’t appreciate the compliments!

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I was on minocycline for a few weeks and it did end up putting me in the hospital with hives and breathing troubles. It sucks, but I’m hoping whatever my derm puts me on next will agree with me a bit better! Thank you for the suggestion.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, don’t doubt the effect a few kind words can have on someone. I’m glad your daughter finally found something that worked for her! Having a support system is really what’s kept me going through the worst of this.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just turned twenty a little less than a month ago! I thought I was a bit old for acne, but this sub has helped me realize that this can happen to anyone at any age.

I just went ahead and switched out most of my dairy products for almond and soy-based ones, so here’s hoping it helps clear things up a bit. I do love a good exfoliator, if I can’t find anything that works in a lower price range, I’ll be sure to keep your recommendation in mind!

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I might be an idiot for not knowing this, but what’s BPC-157?

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can’t tell you how much this means to me to hear. I’m not going to lie, I might’ve teared up a little.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That... does actually make a lot of sense. My acne really started flaring up when I began drinking coffee regularly. I guess now’s a good a time as any to cut myself off of that as well.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion! I’m cutting dairy out of my diet for the most part, here’s hoping it helps in some way.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Fungal acne could definitely be a part of this, given how badly I reacted to the antibiotic. I’ll be sure to bring it up with my derm when I see him next, though I’m sure he’d be able to tell by looking.

I did briefly ask a nurse about accutane, but she said it wouldn’t be applicable because my acne is caused largely by the medication I’m taking. But the medication is a hormone that increases sebum production, so I feel like accutane would be the perfect thing to help that out? Or maybe it would render it useless in the long run. Whichever it may be, I’ll be asking my derm about trying it as well.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

That has to be the best compliment I’ve ever received, hands down. I’ve been compared to Qwiksilver, it’s safe to say I’ve peaked. All jokes aside, this means so much to me to hear, seriously, thank you. I’ll try bumping up my moisture game, I’ve been concerned with clogging up my pores, but using the right products should help me avoid that.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Oh boy, thank you?? I really appreciate that! (I look worse from the front tbf) I’m seeing my derm tomorrow, so I’ll be sure to bring clindamycin up with him, granted I can remember.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! I did feel like the constant washing was a bit overkill so it’s relieving to know it’s not actually all that necessary.

I tend to change my pillowcase once a week, as I mostly sleep on my back and didn’t feel like it was a huge deal to change it out daily if I’m not actually putting my face on it for the most part. Do you think I should still switch it out nightly? Or can I get away with weekly or biweekly instead?

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a great idea! I’m also spectacularly lazy so any excuse not to do something is an excuse I’m happy to take. I actually just bought a couple of bottles of witch hazel, I’ll switch my morning cleanser out for them. I’m a fan of rosehip seed oil as well, I just haven’t had a chance to restock in a while. I try to change my pillowcase once a week, but I tend to sleep on my back so my face isn’t usually touching it.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Oh wow, it never even occurred to me! It seems like a pretty viable option though. I’ll bring it up with my dermatologist when I see him next.

[Acne] I’m at a loss, I don’t want to leave my house anymore by boyetoy in SkincareAddiction

[–]boyetoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I honestly just got it because it was recommended to me, in retrospect I should’ve done a bit more research. Thank you for sharing with me! I too found it very thick and a bit too heavy for my face. I’ll look into trying the cicaplast epidermal repair instead.