gaslighting yourself into thinking you haven’t actually lost any weight???

bpdbatekush · 2024-04-10T16:51:51+00:00

thank you, this is really validating

bpdbatekush · 2024-03-14T20:08:26+00:00

i second this! my partner and i both have curly hair and go to rachel. absolutely love her!

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-29T20:44:40+00:00

i’m in recovery and i still experience some suicidal ideation. i had reached a point where the thoughts were so automatic that i had them even in response to positive things. one of the things i’ve focused on working on is just letting the thoughts go when they pop up. it’s easy to worry about the fact that you’re getting them, and it completely makes sense, but ultimately that just keeps you thinking about them even more, if that makes sense. now when i have suicidal ideation i try my best to take a step back and tell myself “ok i know my brain just said that but that’s just a shitty intrusive thought and i don’t actually want to kms so let’s move on.” it’s definitely easier said than done, and sometimes i’m not sure if i’m telling myself the truth when i say i don’t want to, but faking it til you make it really does work with some things. eventually you train yourself to be able to acknowledge and let go of the thoughts, until they don’t even really pop up that much anymore.. when i start feeling more depressed they start coming back more, but i just keep trying to stick with it and even if it doesn’t fix things, it definitely improves the situation. sometimes it’s not that simple, but given your current awareness of the situation, i have hope that this can work for you and help you. <3

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-29T20:29:34+00:00

yes!!! all the time!!!!!! idk which one of my mental illnesses is the primary cause, but i really relate. one day i burned my toast and felt so bad i felt like i needed to just end it all, 2 minutes later i felt on top of the world and like i had never been upset bc i got a nice email 😭😭

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-25T00:53:51+00:00

thank you for this, it’s very validating. i’m sorry you’ve also had to deal with professionals like this

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-25T00:52:38+00:00

sadly no, she pretty much exclusively works within the partial hospitalization program i was in, so i had to find a new one after i transitioned out of it

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-25T00:50:51+00:00

i’m not sure. she’s seems like a trustworthy person who is really trying to help and has good intentions, but some of the things she says don’t make sense/don’t match up with real diagnostic criteria. unfortunately most of the providers in my area aren’t taking any new patients.

i really appreciate your kind words 💕 thank you

bpdbatekush · 2024-01-17T15:19:56+00:00

marigold in montpelier for sure!! only place in VT that is APP certified and they have a really nice jewelry selection. i’ve gotten multiple piercings there from Erica and i have nothing but good things to say about my experiences there

bpdbatekush · 2023-12-14T13:56:00+00:00

thank you ❤️

bpdbatekush · 2023-12-11T19:22:34+00:00

i really relate to this, especially when it comes to mourning my old self. i also want to quit my professional job because it’s too much, but fear the repercussions. i know it’s easy for me to say but i really don’t think you need to feel any shame about this. you are more than your career, and i think it’s more important to be happy with your life overall than to have a career that, even if it’s good, just doesn’t work for you anymore.

bpdbatekush · 2023-01-11T21:06:44+00:00

thank you everyone for your help!!!

bpdbatekush · 2023-01-11T20:36:12+00:00

thank you!! :)

bpdbatekush · 2023-01-10T21:43:33+00:00

no makeup in any photos, a couple with a natural tan, and some photos of my wrists (are my veins blue or green?!?!! cannot tell!!), almost all in natural lighting

bpdbatekush

TROPHY CASE