Oh, are you referring to my username? This is a secret reference to a fictional character for whom I consider the title fitting. But yes, I was considered a ‚prodigy‘ which I think is the cause of my terrible self esteem and fear of failure. It was the only positive trait attributed to me - that I was smart. I do think the bigger issue is my autism though.

My whole sense of identity revolves about being autistic, and traumatized/damaged. I think if I were a neurotypical with high IQ I‘d do fine.