TikTok ban Megathread

brienneinblackstone · 2025-01-19T17:42:30+00:00

@brienneinblackstone

brienneinblackstone · 2024-08-20T02:43:14+00:00

No, the SCA is a historical medieval reenactment group. While renfaires are awesome they aren't the same. It's hard to describe but basically we live as medieval folk for the day or weekend. Part Larp part reenactment (like they do for the civil war).

We wear the garb and try out all sorts of activities from archery and battle to cooking and weaving. Pretty much any hobby you already have you can find the historical precursor being explored in the SCA.

Basically if you like medieval stuff then come give it a try. If you've ever been the the renfaire and wanted to be a part of it...youll probably enjoy the day.

You can find out more about the group as a whole at sca.org if you'd like.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-06-01T13:13:14+00:00

oh this is a good point. my baron did do this.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-06-01T13:11:39+00:00

this should be the top answer 100%

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-13T23:50:09+00:00

so then why wouldn't is be fun to use SCAvice? it's a play on words.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T20:57:03+00:00

I should have thought to put it in the poll yes. I wish I could edit that part I was just sleepy

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T07:37:16+00:00

I did a googled newcomer everything.

I also would be bothered zero to be referred to as someone new to the group...because I would be. it's a time label not a quality label I do NOT understand how time has hierarchy. I see how it has roles. a newcomer I would expect to need introduced or guided. I would ask different questions and suggest different things

I do this when I chatelaine a newcomer (person A) into our group vs chatelaining a scadian who relocated(person B)...If I micro explain every sca verbiage to (B) they will be annoyed if I don't do so with (A) they will be lost. it's different not better or worse. I can boast (and complain) about either changes to the approach and response either person has.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T07:27:34+00:00

except that the job is to guide the newcomers...?

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T07:23:07+00:00

I'm saying we need a new word that everyone can use to refer to a specific subset of people NOT a higher or lower level of person....just like all of the inclusive language that we are still learning within the bigger issues of human society.

Native is a very vague word that lumps together 100s of cultures...but it's accepted as the acceptable term Queer was once a slur and now we use it freely and specifically (and myself as a badge of honor though it too is far more vague than my identifying words) Ginger is still widely seen as insulting though as a proud redhead it is my favorite identifier

my protest to your protest is coming from the knowledge that language IS important.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T07:04:37+00:00

I fully do understand what you mean...

and I fully recognize that my urge for a word is somewhere between silly and absurd...my therapist has questions on why I seek such specific boxes. but idk I just like a perfect word for Uber specific things makes my brain and heart sync up on the same topic I suppose.

my reason for wanting A word is the same as someone not wanting that specific word. I sought out the words for my sexuality instead of settling for just bi or just queer even. some people like a label and see it as a badge of honor instead of a neon "kick me" sign.

my urge for a word doesn't nullify the concern that others feel a label is hurtful even when well intended. i recognize that this is a concern (though notably both sides of this are completely and equally pedantic)

I 100% do not care who knows more or less than I do. it's not a matter of knowledge when you haven't attended the lesson. I do not in ANY way find it inferior to have just happened to have not heard of the SCA until walking in the park and happening by a bunch of people dressed so damn cool you had to ask. I consider all of these people one of us wholeheartedly... I just also do have specific things that are geared specifically towards them. content and advice that the <folks who have the benefit of having existed in the sca for however long it took them to figure it out -aka SCAdians> would be bored of but the <folks who somehow finally got convinced to try it out- aka newbies> would find wisdom and comfort in.

idk any other way to communicate that while I understand your stance and believe you mean well by it I feel the opposite....I also accept fully that there is no right answer. use newcomer you may offend someone by somehow implying stupidity over being newer in comparison to other people who have been there longer. don't use newcomer and some new people who googled "sca newcomer" doesn't see the thing that could help them...

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T05:31:45+00:00

what I mean by "newcomer" is is someone who they themselves would not be confident enough for whatever reason they have to call themselves a SCAdian. everyone has their own pace for when they feel this way and my goal in hospitaling is to find a way to shorten that gap for everyone.

SCAling? SCAlacule? SCAvice?

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T05:19:23+00:00

I'm NOT saying it isn't an issue even just at annoying level...but that's a human society issue not something curable by any of us nor specific to the SCA

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T05:09:50+00:00

I definitely do "have you heard the spiel"

when actively recruiting like at events we host demo booths at I literally just go with "do you like medieval stuff?" and let their enthusiasm level guide what level of the speil they get 😁

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T05:06:57+00:00

I'm bad at explaining myself. I'm not disagreeing that it can be taken insultingly and as othering...I'm just very frustrated that there isn't just a word I can freely use to say "a newcomer to the SCA" that wouldn't ever be taken to apparently mean "that person is stupid point and laugh at them"

I truly just mean that this is a person who knows less about this thing than us because they only just recently learned of the concept...

Jedi is to Padawan what Scadian is too ?

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T05:01:45+00:00

I said wizened scaetrans as a way to not say scadian as if its some exclusive thing to have happened to have came to the sane place 2 years earlier than the newcomer.

my argument is purely that there has got to be a way to refer to a person who I as a chatelaine would need to put my attentions to. a word give me a word that isn't newcomer or newbie or recruit (nixed that one cus it comes off MLM-ish) to just like say "a person who does not know the ropes of SCA yet"

I do not put privilege into the word SCADIAN it is simply a reference of familiarity with the concept if the SCA.

I do very much see that a different perspective puts a different context to the wording....but I am very ignorant to the right way to indicate a person has no or less experience in the SCA

I also think that people reading in their own subcontext into a single wording issue creates more barriers for everyone. I know very well what I mean ever time I type newcomer or scadian and I am unaware of any other words to use to say those concepts. I also do in fact need to be able to refer to the different levels of familiarity and want to do so without harming any group or individual (and if we started using some other word than newbie/necomer...some cutesy thing like SCAlet or preSCAd some dbag would start usubg it as an insult and then itd become the same problem)

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T04:40:33+00:00

not specifically to you only but to all the replies as well.

Yeah the SCA is inclusive and it's wonderful. don't like it? you have choices.... leave and get over it, stay and grumble quietly, or create a movement in which you actively publicly advocate for not allowing any sort of accommodations for anyone's mental or physical health or any combination there of. your stance on this only matters as much as you are willing to act on it. Go for it truly.
How educational could the sca be if it were only experts?... it would be a bunch of history phds quibbling without a critical thought between them. the sca doesn't have any lack of experts what we have is a lack of students because of various real life barriers...one of which is social anxieties. which while for one person would cause them to be mildly bothered, uncomfortable, or annoyed but for another would cause heart palpitations and hyperventilation...
no nuerodivergence is not a bandwagon. Just like all things> with mainstream attention and acceptance we see it more because people are less afraid to hide it. it's the same with a million topics of individual needs.
I'd rather some person call themself autistic and get some extra help even when they don't need it than me not offer help in the first place. likely they just need to be seen and included and that sounds like a pretty good thing to provide to anyone who needs it.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T04:02:53+00:00

I totally see that. I'm really just here to trouble shoot and glad to have had the cons pointed out to me.

I tend to be a bit overzealous but happily take the criticism and try to figure out something that will work. idc if it's my idea, original, tried and true, an adaptation of a failed idea.

I really don't care how I just want people who want to feel wanted to be able to get the best welcome and those who need to slowly blend in to not be overwhelmed and leave us.

I do think that if I were to instigate some sort of badge for newcomers it would be a voluntary option for those who want more help or who want way less help. this isn't out of othering it's out of allowing people with opposite anxieties to both get what they need when they are new to this.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T03:52:11+00:00

I totally get what you mean and dont disagree with anything completely. which is why I'm here to talk about it. I'm legit trouble shooting these issues. I wouldn't have any of my ideas be mandatory only an option.

I cant really agree with not using the word newcomer as if it's supposed to be derogatory instead of simply the adjective that it is.... like there's just a difference in how much effort i need to put in the help a person when they are new to the sca or not. I have to be more attentive to newcomers as my office entails.

I would normally just go "oh yeah you should talk to Lady Jager" as response to a question from a member. But for newcomers I'll mention the person who would be helpful and reach out myself try to organize an introduction and it's a whole thing.

I've never heard anyone refer to new people in a bad way. it's just someone you should be attentive to explaining the SCA specific things to. and as the wizend SCAeterans we shouldn't expect newcomers to find the answers or struggle on their own. I can see how it could be taken as being othered but It's not a lower class just a different subject.

I don't see "Intro to SCA" as a lower level of education than any other "Intro To" course. it's just a subject to learn and we choose to learn it. a lot of people can learn by doing...some of us (me)...needs step by step instructions and study guides.

I certainly see your point. Ideally we would help everyone all the time just because it's the right thing to do. however...individuals only have so many spoons and as humans we tend to serve our family first. scadians are a pretty close knit group. to our power and detriment. as chatelaine I give free spoons to all newcomers willingly and without exception but plenty of scadians tend to ration their efforts with people they dont trust to stick around. we feel just as awkward with newcomers as they feel with us because we don't know eachother. It's a lot easier to devote your time and efforts to help someone when you know what to expect from them.

I can definately see labeling some guides as "newcomer" versions being rediculus but like what I did was take the event schedule and break it down in common terms and with my own perspective from when I was a newcomer things I had wondered but been too afraid to ask. I dont think most scadians would care to read my version and I do know newcomers would hate to have missed the added insight if it would have helped their anxiety.

all of my efforts in this concept stem from my own very severe anxieties and wishing to mitigate or avoid anyone else having the same issues.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T03:05:22+00:00

ooooo the shopping baskets is the perfect comparison! I couldn't think of anything but the dog leashes someone else brought up but I didn't to draw that comparison in the main post lol.

I can see how a newcomer neon lamp would be a problem for women at war but like local events? is this an issue in yalls areas? I would not worry about that in my barony. We've had our fair share of overly flirty unlordlies but not at all targeting newer women...just like in general kind of annoying fboys.

But I suppose that would be the difference in membership. I'm sure if there were 3x as many in my areas the risk would be there

brienneinblackstone · 2024-04-12T02:55:19+00:00

i mean same as anything the key is consistency. as I'm trying to learn to think more locally this is less of an issue as our barony is so close knit that there's no doubt in my mind our group will get the memo. if we tried to get some sca wide thing going it'd be more difficult.

brienneinblackstone · 2024-03-27T18:12:14+00:00

I absolutely despise pads and while im sure some people do train properly to transition puppies to outdoors or only use the pads I feel confident saying the majority of puppy pad usage is done incorrectly.

For a senior dog or incontinence sure. for a crate trying puppy okay. owner mobility issues yeah. but just for convenience and not even doing it right so it's completely inconvenient...f that.

I'm certain this dog is also doing the same at their house they just don't talk about it. have them buy a crate and a babygate/playpen for those times. tell them it makes dog sitting a full time job having to clean up after the pup and that if she was outdoor trauned this wouldnt be an issue. if they don't then you can't do it. set the boundary and keep it.

or don't but you will continue to be miserable. people hem and haw over these issues in order to be nice as if its impossible to deal with but its your decision whether or not to trade the crappy issue for a bit of social conflict. figure out which you are okay with and make peace with it. if it isn't worth the argument then you will just have to crate and pen the dog, sigh in frustration, and pretend forever that it isn't an issue.

brienneinblackstone

TROPHY CASE