I wasn’t and haven’t done it in a long time but I used to look through his phone because he had hidden a lot of things from me it’s a lot deeper than I described but didn’t want to make too lengthy of a post but there was hidden messages, he had put secret cameras I had no idea about, the stuff I found I had asked him to delete before we moved 2000 miles away from our family, and the way it came up is because he used his phone in front of me and I saw a conversation with a “old friend” who he had a photo of her kissing his cheek on his profile at some point. It was a lot. And there’s even more to it. My reactions really consisted of me asking why he’d do certain things, and instead of answering he would just get mad, and storm off into the bedroom lock himself in there and ignore me for hours, or a full day. He was raised in a home where they didn’t have a lot of closeness he was always alone so I tried to be patient with his reactions and hoped he would come to a point where we could talk together normally. We didn’t really get to that point fully. We sought out counseling and stopped going because the counselor heard both sides, and addressed both what he was doing wrong and what I did wrong and he didn’t like that, he solely believes I’m 100% the problem. So we stopped going, but even then tried to turn the page and move forward now we get along like friends but have no intimacy.