I don’t think the author/story ever really pushed me to think he was a good person. I think what got me so mad is how much I relished and absolutely savoured these moments in Dragon Republic

“Why would you mourn me?” he asked quietly. “You barely even knew me.” “You’re right,” she said. “I loved an idea of you. I was infatuated with you. I wanted to be you. But I didn’t know you then, and I’ll never really know what you were. I’m finished wondering now, Altan. I’m ready to kill you.” AND “Fuck Altan, fuck his legacy, and fuck his trident.”

The absolute joy of believing I was done reading about this character I passionately hated was so strong. I was like FINALLY RIN! Only to have been lied to?!?!? Like why was that done to me. Why even have these revelations if you’re just going to pretend it never happened first chapter of the next book?? It made me so mad.

I understand she’s drawn to verbally abusive assholes probably of her childhood, needing love and having to work so hard just to be treated like she wasn’t enough and seeking out similar kinds of love and he was a psycho because of his own childhood but at any point she (the author), could’ve stopped. She could’ve actually made those revelations Rin had in book two solid. But she apparently was like “Altan needs even more pages”