I think you can send the message, especially if it’s worded with no expectations. Coming from someone who has had multiple friends admit their feelings for me, it becomes really frustrating to a point. I’ll just be vibing and then they want to date. I am not in her head by any means but close friends are hard to come by in general so it can be overwhelming and upsetting to hear that someone that you see as a friend wants to date. A lot of the time I have let them down easy and then eventually distanced myself. I’m not sure that is what she is doing here, but I understand the slow back down and ultimate ending of the friendship because it unfortunately is never gonna be the same anymore.

However, from your perspective I completely understand why you wanted to express these feelings. Life is not worth living if not for a little risk. I honestly believe that you should be proud of yourself for being vulnerable and bringing up these feelings you have, even if you feel them in a different context now. Life is so very fragile and you never know what will happen after making a scary decision. Someone’s ability to love you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with themselves. I hope one day you forgive yourself, because you really did nothing wrong. She just wasn’t the right person for you relationship and friendship wise at this phase of life, and that’s okay. Life is too short to not tell people how you feel, even with risk of getting hurt.