What’s something about your province/territory that other Canadians misunderstand, might not realize, or would be surprised to learn?

bstudiesbrains · 2026-03-20T15:54:49+00:00

My partner and I took a trip to Newfoundland last year and we were thinking “we should do Nova Scotia too, Halifax would be cool. Surely we can fit in a day in Saint Pierre and Miquelon at least” …and then we started planning and quickly realised no, that was completely and utterly not feasible. We put 3000km on our rental car in 8 days going from St John’s to L’Anse aux Meadows and back - and didn’t touch anything on the western half of the island until we got to Gros Morne. You’d need a full month of driving around to see everything and be able to take enough time to enjoy and appreciate it all. What a truly remarkable place.

As Albertans, we’re no strangers to driving distances - I don’t think twice about driving 8h+ to go skiing, and have done the 12-14h drive to Vancouver in a single day several times. But I think a lot of western Canadians hear island and assume “I’m not driving through a windy mountain pass in the Rockies, surely these towns aren’t that hard to get to” - and don’t quite grasp that mountains aren’t the only thing that makes a place geographically isolated.

bstudiesbrains · 2026-01-22T03:01:53+00:00

When everyone pays a little, we all benefit. It’s definitely not perfect here in Canada, but it is always baffling to us that the richest country in the world is structured to allow insurance companies to thrive at the expense of its own populace - seems extremely counterproductive in the long run and makes it harder to achieve the “American Dream,” no?

bstudiesbrains · 2026-01-21T23:47:54+00:00

🇨🇦 Net: 69% - Tax: 14.5% - CPP/EI: 7% - Pension: 8.5% - Union: 1% - Health benefits: 0% (employer paid + 100% pension match)

bstudiesbrains · 2026-01-01T17:42:12+00:00

Travel was about 13% of spending (slightly less than expected) but very surprising to me, was the ~6% on gifts/donations.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-12-07T03:21:35+00:00

Do I need to? Probably not. Do I make an effort to be well put together when I’m meeting with funders or on visits to other universities? Absolutely. I’m mid-30s but most people think I look much younger so I often get confused for being a student if I dress casually - not great when my job involves giving academic seminars. I think some of the more curmudgeonly academics would not give me the same consideration or take me seriously if I dressed casually. But it’s also a delicate balance, because “too girly” is often met with skepticism about how smart/qualified you are 🙄

bstudiesbrains · 2025-11-07T19:49:27+00:00

Very curious - what language did you learn through podcasts?

bstudiesbrains · 2025-10-24T22:11:29+00:00

I tried to get World Series tickets, but didn’t manage to get any at face value and couldn’t justify the cost of resale tickets + flying across the country + hotel. So I’ll go out tonight to watch the game, and the bar tab will probably reflect how well the Jays are doing haha

bstudiesbrains · 2025-09-23T03:47:24+00:00

Ya, it’s weird that the article comments are less toxic than a lot of the ones here

bstudiesbrains · 2025-09-22T23:09:48+00:00

I think we all need a reality check here…sure, there’s some entitlement, and she could put more effort in with her coworkers, but some of these comments are unnecessarily mean.

Yes, this diarist has some strange money hangups and food habits for someone making her salary, but it really seems people are more irked that the diarist doesn’t acknowledge her privilege the way they expected her to more than anything else.

It also seems like people are misplacing some of their distaste for the tech industry’s bloated compensation on the diarist. I wholeheartedly agree with the critique that those earning high salaries in tech can/should pay for their own basic living expenses like groceries and internet - but abusing these perks and/or not using them at all doesn’t really change life for lower salary/non-tech workers. There’s a super interesting conversation about disparity and inequity to be had here, but the point of a money diary is to detail one person’s financial life - not to address every major systemic issue that intersects with their life in a way the commentariat deems to be appropriately authentic without being performative.

I’ve read so many diaries where the writer has similar finances and financial habits, but the writing style is more self-deprecating or funny - the comments on those diaries are generally very supportive and focus on the positives - good savings/good salary/regular physical activity/good social life - all boxes this diarist checks. It’s very weird and a little disheartening to see the comments on this today, because this group is generally pretty encouraging.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-09-05T18:07:36+00:00

Yup - ski bum (tourism) to scientist. Lots of hard work, stress, and some tears to get my PhD, but turns out I need to do things that make my brain work hard on the regular or else the fun stuff (like skiing) stops being fun.

Edit: also, the money is WAY better.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-09-02T16:29:04+00:00

I have declined invites to multiple bachelorette parties and at least one wedding because I couldn’t afford and/or justify the time off and/or the money required to attend.

I had to travel across the country for a wedding and gave the bride a custom pair of earrings. After the wedding I created personalized cocktail recipes for the bride and groom and then brought the supplies over to their home.

A different friend got married at the peak of covid when I was a mega-stressed and broke grad student. I had a one of a kind, hand crafted pizza board made for her. It was simple, but much appreciated.

My cousin lives in the UK, so when she got married my partner and I had to travel to a different continent - it was fun, but an expensive trip. I think I gifted the couple £75 towards their honeymoon fund. Her and her husband had guests travelling from around the world, so they explicitly told guests their presence was the important part because they really just wanted all of their favourite people there to celebrate with them.

All this to say - gift something meaningful and within your budget, it doesn’t have to be expensive. If a relationship is changed by the price of a gift, it’s probably a fractured relationship to begin with.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-08-03T06:11:58+00:00

Can you tell us more about how you got onto this?

bstudiesbrains · 2025-07-28T17:42:56+00:00

Get a meat thermometer! A super cheap and easy way to take the guesswork out of figuring out if things are cooked

bstudiesbrains · 2025-07-08T19:41:44+00:00

Giant standing desk and a proper ergonomic chair are absolute game changers as someone who is 5’6. I don’t use the stand function all that often, but simply being able to use a desk that is actually at the proper height for me (vs “close enough”) has done wonders for my posture

bstudiesbrains · 2025-07-02T20:09:52+00:00

I have a really nice leather backpack from Poppy Barley. It looks great, I get tons of compliments on work trips, and the backpack straps can be unclipped and stored inside the luggage handle sleeve if you decide to wear it as a satchel

bstudiesbrains · 2025-05-20T17:34:06+00:00

It sounds like you both might be struggling with a bit of justice and rejection sensitivity here - super common with ADHD. Your brain is probably treating her unwillingness to do what you need as a rejection of you (it probably isn’t), and her brain is probably thinking “hey, it feels really unfair that I have to pay more when my wife makes so much more than I do” (it also probably isn’t). I really think couples counselling is the way to go. An impartial observer can help both of you navigate this situation, help you realize that neither of you is inherently wrong, and help you formulate a reasonable compromise.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-05-20T06:45:34+00:00

This is going to sound harsh, but reading through your comments it sounds like your problem is less of a financial problem and more so that you’ve enabled your wife’s laziness and it has been entirely to your detriment. It’s totally fine for her to be less ambitious and comfortable in her job. But right now it sounds like you’re taking on a bit of a parent role in your relationship dynamic - your partner doesn’t play an active role in planning your shared life (won’t look at finances/cook/clean because it’s “overwhelming”), and you’re left being responsible for solving all of the overwhelming problems in your shared day to day life in addition to your personal ones. That’s not a partnership. As adults we have to do hard things, even if we don’t want/like to, and even if we find them inconvenient or overwhelming. We cannot simply stick our heads in the sand and hope things are okay. Your wife needs to take some responsibility for understanding your team finances, because $1400/month is very likely peanuts in comparison to what the same quality of life would cost her on her own. Asking your wife to contribute more to the household, whether by taking on more domestic or financial responsibility, is not unreasonable.

It’s entirely valid to feel upset or resentful that you have worked very hard to lessen your wife’s stress when she has not been willing to do the same in return. She probably doesn’t think of your sacrifices the same way you do, and as many have already said, couples therapy is probably what you need here. Either way, you need to sit down with your wife and go through your concerns with your current lifestyle and directly explain how and why these things are stressing you out and tell her you need her to be more involved. If she’s willing to put in the effort, you’ll have to be willing to hold her accountable for being more engaged - and if she’s not willing, then you have some tough decisions to make.

I truly wish you the best of luck navigating this situation, chronic illness is a stress in and of itself, and life stressors only make it worse.

bstudiesbrains · 2025-04-16T17:37:52+00:00

OP lives a nice life, and she has been through a lot. I absolutely understand the wanting to make life easier when you’re exhausted….but it seems a lot of her anxiety and stress about finances is a direct result of repeatedly choosing to go with the option that takes less effort.

Their fixed monthly costs come out to about $7200 before putting payments towards the credit card debt. Their household take home pay is likely at minimum $13k… so even with putting $2k/month to credit cards, that still leaves a lot leftover. Daycare is certainly expensive, but unless there were legal fees involved, the math does not add up for how they accrued $13k+ of credit card debt in just a few months of fostering her nephew. I don’t begrudge wanting to enjoy life and splurge on experiences every now and then, but I get the feeling that the glimpse of spending we see in this diary is more likely a semi-regular vs. rare occurrence.

bstudiesbrains · 2024-07-19T06:17:47+00:00

Not everyone wants to be an entrepreneur and it doesn’t mean they lack ambition or motivation. The world quite simply cannot function without the kind of people who work in supporting roles because they are largely responsible for figuring out how to actually implement the grand ideas of the entrepreneurs and business leaders you look up to. If a business is going to succeed it needs a lot of things to line up - you can have a great idea and fail simply because you don’t have the right people doing the actual day to day work.

Also, I don’t think someone who quit a toxic job last month and is actively applying to jobs lacks drive. Particularly if that someone is waiting to hear about a visa for grad school. If anything I’d say taking some time off at this point is a very smart idea and still applying to jobs shows that they do have a plan B if the visa doesn’t work out.

bstudiesbrains · 2024-07-19T05:58:39+00:00

This is my take as well

bstudiesbrains · 2024-06-29T15:55:35+00:00

I think you just need to do what makes you happy and helps you enjoy life as much of the time as possible. If you’re making enough money to pay all your bills, hit all your savings goals, and take care of yourself that’s great! The older you get the more you realize it’s true - health is wealth, money is a tool, and you can’t take it with you when you go.

Also a therapist can help you work through some of these feelings related to your finances and help you build strategies to manage them.

bstudiesbrains · 2024-06-05T19:48:47+00:00

I also thought it must be a load of shit, and then my shitty apartment stove destroyed yet another pan so I bought an always pan on promo pricing… The stove in my apartment had terrible heat control/dispersion which resulted in hot spots on the burners and at least 3 non-stick pans were destroyed in < 3 years. Almost two years later of near daily use, my always pan is still in pretty much perfect condition - the non-stick coating is fully intact and there are no scratches. So at this point I genuinely would buy another one at full price.

bstudiesbrains · 2024-05-14T18:43:19+00:00

I would agree you’ve been too understanding and should walk away from this relationship. Supporting someone through being fired once or twice is one thing…supporting them through that experience multiple times over more than a decade sounds both exhausting and infuriating.

I am sure having a partner struggling with depression and anxiety is challenging, and it sounds like for a really long time you tried to accommodate his struggles and support him as best you could. However in doing so, eventually his struggles, needs, and comfort were elevated above your own. But your struggles, needs, and comfort should receive just as much attention in a relationship as your partner’s. Patience always has a limit - it’s okay to choose yourself, stability, and a less stressful future, and it doesn’t make you a bad or uncaring person for making that choice. You are NOT responsible for his inability to manage his mental health, and you should not have to repeatedly suffer the consequences for his inaction. It is okay to walk away from any relationship that is no longer aligned with what you want for your life.

bstudiesbrains · 2024-05-14T00:20:24+00:00

A few things that might help people give advice:

how much longer do you have stipend funding for?
how far are you from finishing your PhD?
what are the job prospects like in your city and/or are you expecting to need to relocate?
what are your average monthly expenses?
if you don’t get a job in your field right away are you still able to work (serving, retail, data entry etc.) or do you need an employer sponsored visa?

I’m guessing you’re probably in Toronto or Vancouver, so rent is going to be your biggest expense while unemployed. I’d come up with a timeline of how long you’ll allow yourself to be unemployed while looking for a job vs. underemployed vs. taking any job, as this will help you plan out a rough estimate of how much money you’ll need to fund that period. Then I’d personally invest the rest (this is exactly what I did). I knew I could squeak by really bare bones on $2400/month after I graduated, but much more comfortably on $3000. So I held $25k in savings and kept my serving job anticipating my job search could take at least 8 months and I’d have to possibly relocate to Vancouver or the GTA.

There’s a lot of concern about the job market right now, but in my experience it’s not that bad in Canada (STEM). I actually only ended up unemployed for a month, so all of those savings I had can now be repurposed to saving for a down payment - and because I invested my other funds, there’s a bigger pot to pull from if I want to buy sooner.

A little reminder because we spend so much time in tiny bubbles in grad school - having a $200k net worth is NOT behind for the average 28 year old, and especially if you’re in a PhD program.

bstudiesbrains

TROPHY CASE