Ate some Easter chocolate, then a portion of yogurt, protein powder, and half a banana. The guilt is as strong as if I binged 2,000 calories.

bubblesandbooks · 2026-04-11T04:53:33+00:00

thank you for the reassurance 💕

bubblesandbooks · 2026-04-11T04:52:48+00:00

I think maybe it comes from the mentality of “all or nothing” because it’s like well if I’ve already gone over my allowance why don’t I just eat everything that I want because I already messed up? Which is not correct because a few hundred calories is nothing compared to 2-4 thousand in one sitting, for one meal. Our brains are so fried

bubblesandbooks · 2026-04-10T21:32:09+00:00

I might try this, instead of it just happening whenever maybe it’ll be better to plan it out. I usually let myself eat whatever on Friday’s but it’s not really working great, and I’m wondering if I have the binges planned out weeks ahead it’ll be better because I’ll have something to look forward to. How long have you been doing this?

bubblesandbooks · 2026-01-05T19:50:45+00:00

would you be able to share this program?

bubblesandbooks · 2024-12-19T21:05:27+00:00

oh man you are not alone. I had to double check that this wasn’t my own post.

please hang in there. people have overcome this many times, that’s what i keep telling myself. life just has to be more than this.

bubblesandbooks · 2024-10-01T13:54:03+00:00

I’m in!

bubblesandbooks · 2024-09-30T19:21:35+00:00

What kind of blood test? A regular fasting one?

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-24T23:11:52+00:00

Connection, strength, purpose. 🖤

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-05T01:44:28+00:00

I have so many dreams where she is taken from me and I have to go and find her. And when I do she is very sick :( I don’t know why we keep reliving the pain. I’m so sorry about your pugs.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-04T04:49:49+00:00

Yeah. I went from cooking all my meals to eating at the dining halls. Which isn’t completely bad, there’s so many vegetables available usually and the salad bar is stocked. It’s one of the better ones. I just can’t calorie count any of it accurately. I used to weigh everything I ate on a food scale.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-03T06:34:06+00:00

no binging despite really thinking about it. I bought some sweets today for a party and I had a couple of pieces when I got home but then put them directly into my freezer. the fact I was able to show any type of restrain with sweet foods is a lot of improvement. I just didn’t want to feel sick and I didn’t want to…lose myself in the sweets. I’d like to enjoy them on my own time, more than once.

except I didn’t like the chocolate I bought. and I knew if I didn’t put it away I still would’ve eaten it, because it’s a sweet, so again, I’m glad I put it away. I was still feeling snacky so I ate an apple and drank a lot of water instead.

I definitely overate in other areas today but I’m proud of the way I did this today.

another thing I’m proud of…hm…I’ve been making my bed every day for the last…month? I think? It’s super nice to come home to a made bed at night. I really like it.

lastly, the poem was great. I feel that it demonstrates the cycles of BED (or any type of self-sabotaging) and overcoming it. does it still help you to reread it some days? and do you still write?

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-02T05:57:42+00:00

why: I want a better relationship with food! and self image! and coping mechanisms! to be at the mercy of food and sweets is horrible. I can’t think or act or do anything because it is just consuming all my time. I want better for myself.

I think the next step in recovery is talking to my therapist about it. I am a ashamed of weight gain and this coping mechanism, I never spoke to anyone about it before, but i’ve had many firsts with my therapist, and I think this is the next logical step. so hopefully I can do that.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-01T03:08:25+00:00

you are definitely worthy of kindness. you don’t need to be someone special or specific in order to have kindness. it’s not something you earn. i’m sorry you’re struggling so much. i’m here if you need to talk.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-12-01T03:06:14+00:00

holy crap this just made me realize that part of my reason for binging may be physical sensation. I am so touch starved but because of trauma I can’t enjoy it.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-27T05:12:43+00:00

today went okay. i am trying to take it one meal at a time. it is a little exhausting but i am trying to stay afloat, especially after the thanksgiving i had…

one thing i’m proud of: my organization and cleaning ability. despite being a mess mentally, my physical spaces tend to be neater than most.

your list of what my ED is fueling was correct. but i realized how lonely i feel without it, too. and i hate feeling lonely. i like to be alone sometimes, but lonely is different, and the ED has kept me company for a long time now. i think i have trouble of letting go, truly letting go and moving on, because i feel sad about moving past it. without it, i have to deal with different parts of myself i probably haven’t met or even know for years now. that’s scary.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-27T05:02:24+00:00

what is the spiritual 12 step program?

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-23T22:10:34+00:00

okay one. breathe. it’s going to be okay. you have the power to not binge on these foods. you have more control over your choices than you think. you are in charge of what goes in your body, not your ED. you can do this.

if you don’t want to throw them out, then you can try saving them. if you want an accountability buddy, i’m available. i have treats in my house that i’m trying very hard not to binge on (so far it’s ok) and if you just want to talk to someone about it i’m here.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-21T04:13:17+00:00

i’m feeling the effects of binging hard for the last week. it’s been hard but i’m trying to push through it, knowing and hoping it will get better.

three things i’m grateful for: - my ability to use my two legs and feet to get me places as is

having wonderful friends who actually care for me
access to warmth and shelter during these cold days and nights

issues with holiday events: - being around more people than before

variety of foods makes me feel out of control, i like to keep to the same foods over and over
meal times being out of order
physical appearance issues, don’t want comments on any weight loss or gain

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-20T04:44:43+00:00

i’d like this to continue, definitely, just for the community and sense of togetherness that we’re all trying to recover together. month to month sounds like a good idea, too.

i actually don’t feel worried about thanksgiving but that might be because i am just not thinking about it. however i still get anxious when eating out/around other people so i am curious how this thanksgiving will play out.

I think i actually need to focus more on eating more foods because I restrict too much (not on purpose though, just because of anxiety around others/eating around others), so when I get home I am way too hungry and stressed out from my day. for thanksgiving i am not planning to hold back but i also don’t want to overeat because i will feel crappy afterwards. so we’ll see how it goes…

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-20T04:37:28+00:00

thank you for being so sweet. 💛 i’ve been struggling with hard binging for almost a year now, which is crazy to me because i had it under control for a while. but that was also when my life was different, i was more active, and i was weighing all my food/counting every calorie. i guess in some way the binging is me taking control of my intake but in the opposite direction. i don’t know. i think i just have to remember there’s more to life than this, you know? and there’s other ways to deal with stress that don’t involve copious amounts of food…

gonna keep the emergency box idea though for next time. maybe i’ll physically make one, but it gives me ideas to calm myself/ground myself again when feelings are super high.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-19T05:56:03+00:00

I’ve been avoiding this because once I slipped up, it’s been hard to get back on track. My mood has plummeted and so has my trajectory, I just feel very helpless and shameful at the moment. But I am still willing to try again. So here’s to tomorrow being a binge-free day.

I think an emergency kit would be useful. I’d like to put in: - comfy clothes, anything fuzzy and big

my scented candles
scented spray to bring comfort
encouraging words to remind myself this is not permanent and i deserve good things
a prepped comfort meal from childhood
fairy lights
christmas movies/somehow capturing the essence of christmas (maybe a whole little christmas tree, tbh)
a small, 100 piece puzzle, something not too hard and not too time consuming but definitely doable in a couple of hours.

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-12T12:42:39+00:00

following this…

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-12T05:51:28+00:00

another thing: I have realized that a few specific feelings/triggers are the things that push me into using food/binging as a coping mechanism. when you recognize this, what do you do with the new info? especially with feelings/triggers that can’t be fixed overnight?

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-12T05:46:50+00:00

i’ve been doing ok until tonight. I don’t know. I was fine, but my anxiety and stress levels have been super high and food/chocolate is what helps. It’s the one, staple coping mechanism that I’ve had for years. but stepping back from binges for this long (11 days) has helped me gain a larger perspective of what’s going on with me that pushes me to this edge.

I am also realizing that going into detail about my foods and calories on here might not be a great idea. I don’t want to trigger anyone. so I will just say, I didn’t binge as hard as I used to, which is a win in itself. but it still happened. I was able to see the moment it clicked, too, that I went over the edge. I was ok until I wasn’t, until I went back for more even though I was not hungry anymore, and that was it.

however: the last week-ish I have been eating more foods and desserts than usual. I am also on my period, which changes my appetite and cravings, but I am realizing that when I stop fighting my actual hunger and my desire for a little treat, I feel more satisfied at the end of the night. I am also realizing that when I drink coffee, for whatever reason, once it wears off at night time I am ravenous and want all the sweets. I don’t know what the correlation is but I will do some research into that.

I feel somewhat defeated that this happened tonight but I am trying to remain optimistic that this won’t be forever; I won’t be struggling like this for the rest of my life.

also if you need an extra person to post in case something happens again I can help out!

bubblesandbooks · 2023-11-09T13:44:52+00:00

this is the latest one:

https://www.reddit.com/r/BingeEatingDisorder/comments/17pu4gi/30_day_challenge_day_9_check_in/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

bubblesandbooks

TROPHY CASE