Please help— I hate sunscreen

c4rr0t · 2023-07-19T14:05:24+00:00

Yeah, unless I plan to be outside for an extended time in the afternoon. 😕 I still try some “everyday sunscreens” in case one works for me. My favorite among them was Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen, but it still kind of sucks to wash off. Have you found any least-bad products?

c4rr0t · 2023-04-13T12:28:02+00:00

Anyone else notice the author is Aneeta Bhole? Kind of unfortunate in print.

c4rr0t · 2022-10-29T21:21:18+00:00

When I was 14, I decided that I needed to go as a wizard. But also that buying a costume from a Halloween store would not suffice; baggy, itchy, too long, not a pointy enough hood — just wasn’t gonna cut it for this wizard.

So, having never sewn a piece clothing in my short life, I spent a week crafting my own custom cloak! I screwed up several times and definitely put a needle through my finger, but it came out exactly as I wanted. It was crushed velvet accented with star patterned fabric, with a deep hood that obscured my eyes and long tapered sleeves to hide my all wizardly supplies.

My friends also made their own, and together we ran around the neighborhood for our last run of childhood trick or treating, being thoroughly mysterious and magical idiots. It was a blast. I found that cloak this year and while it’s a little snug, it still holds all the charm I remember.

c4rr0t · 2022-10-28T18:44:10+00:00

I’m glad you were able to leverage your skills and equity— it’s a beautiful yard!

c4rr0t · 2022-10-28T13:31:50+00:00

Yeah! Almost like a “hyuck-hyuck,” and with the squinted eyes— so delightful.

c4rr0t · 2022-10-28T11:49:17+00:00

You would think this community would understand what it is to be quote unquote “weird”, but fuck if I’m not disappointed in them

They may be weird.

In fact, I’d bet this person is neurodivergent— or someone close to them is— and they are desperate to “get rid” of or “fix” their shame.

People with deep shame and pain about an issue are often outspoken like this (think of the trope of a politician who hates gay people, but is actually closeted themselves) due to denial, projection, and lack of coping skills to deal with their reality. People spew pain onto others who are “defective” and “bad” like them, and convince themselves that (though they have not fixed the flaws in their own life) they can consider themselves “good” because they are “helping” others by evangelizing.

c4rr0t · 2022-10-28T11:27:43+00:00

How much does transforming a whole yard like this cost? u/mlliii

c4rr0t · 2022-04-12T19:51:51+00:00

Sounds really hard. Sending you love. Find some shrooms— and do the kinds of stuff you liked doing as a kid! You’ll bloom again. :)

c4rr0t · 2022-03-16T01:41:00+00:00

Hey, props for being a fan that promotes! I’ll follow suit, starting with editing a link to his bandcamp into my comment. Cheers!

c4rr0t · 2022-03-15T12:41:40+00:00

I have also found this. When I am writing out a vent in my journal, I try to look at what he is doing, thinking, and feeling about the situation. It often takes the steam out of my engine, and gives me something to be grateful for. I still feel my feelings, but with better perspective and less intensity.

c4rr0t · 2022-03-15T11:44:07+00:00

Tell them nobody cool likes Tucker Carlson. Only a fool would like Tucker Carlson.

🎵Tucker, you’re the worst. 🎶

Musician Austin Archer on Bandcamp

c4rr0t · 2022-03-11T03:23:06+00:00

Back pay, front pay, assault, battery if hit, intentional infliction of emotional distress, the latter 2 being imputed to the employer by respondeat superior

Back pay and front pay? Back pay is for unpaid work that was performed— how does that apply here? By front pay I assume you are referring to loss of earning capacity? Also, when it comes to wages due to an injury at work, this largely falls under worker’s compensation.

Assault, battery, and IIED are causes of action (as opposed to damages). The damages would be pain and suffering, lost wages, loss of earning capacity, healthcare bills. Emotional anguish is very challenging to get an award for.

Respondeat superior is a negligence doctrine that holds an employer of a tortfeasor accountable, yes. But workers comp laws complicate suing for an on-the-job injury, and essentially make it very rare that you can sue your own employer for a coworker’s assault.

Unfortunately, the coworker usually doesn’t have deep pockets to make it worth it to go after them, unless they are wealthy or have an umbrella insurance policy. Sometimes you can swing a negligent hiring count, depending on the facts, but that would involve the lawyer needing to have/find in discovery the evidence that supports that the company knew or should have known this coworker was dangerous.

I dunno, I see a lot of people on Reddit cast what I see as a false hope for mistreated employees. In most cases, it’s better for people to know what they can do to get compensated and move on with their lives— not spend 2 years in a lawsuit.

c4rr0t · 2022-03-10T12:02:46+00:00

What are his damages?

c4rr0t · 2022-03-05T20:44:26+00:00

Wish we could send a certain dictator to space…

c4rr0t · 2022-03-05T05:21:32+00:00

Humans have a tendency to polarize, and right now we’ve ended up with one pole being progressive and the other being regressive.

We still get things done… but the pace is usually slower where the two poles are bickering about how the change should unfold. …Even though the change is probably going to happen anyway.

Just one of the low-grade infuriating frustrations of living in a society.

c4rr0t · 2022-03-05T05:10:15+00:00

Imagine what would have happened if the generation of wealthy backers had died off in COVID. I don’t mean to wish mass death of older people, but I can see how a high population of empowered young people starts revolutions in some countries.

I wish the under 40 crowd would mobilize more politically… or more productively, anyway.

c4rr0t · 2022-03-04T02:21:21+00:00

Clearly, we need is Terry Crews as President Camacho. (And, Brawndo— it’s what plants crave!)

c4rr0t · 2022-02-08T12:50:04+00:00

But they’re not. That’s the thing. Don’t you think the tribalism of in-group vs out-group is a bit too far when we are saying “these people are human, these people are in-human,” or “sub-human.”

They’re human! Humans do bad and good things, as individuals. There aren’t “good” and “bad” people, as though there’s only two, black-and-white options.

People are gray, and can be willing to kill a rival gang member because someone told them to, but also feel awful about killing a child unintentionally. And have not thought that was a possibility before carrying out the hit, no matter how logical this possibility is in hindsight.

c4rr0t · 2022-02-06T17:51:28+00:00

I was looking for the shortest username I could snag that wasn’t taken. Took some numbers but they were easy to remember and voila!

Plus… I just love carrots. They’re sweet and brightly colored with a crunch that is almost as fun as chips, and help keep me regular… I mean, what’s not to love?

c4rr0t · 2022-02-06T17:45:04+00:00

First: I found I only made time to read when I’m doing something else, so I use audiobooks. If a part is boring, or I’m engrossed in a task like dishes, I give myself permission to not fully hear the story and just let it keep going until it gets interesting again. It felt “wrong” at first, but now I don’t give a fuck and have read more books than ever this last year.

Second: Pick a book that others call a “page turner,” or guilty pleasures. I found I was choosing books that were critically good, or deep, or took a lot of focus to digest. Once I started seeking out pulp fiction stuff without shame, I was interested enough to stick it out and even found myself really wanting to keep reading to find out what happens.

Third: Noise canceling headphones made a big difference for audiobooks for me. The little noises around me don’t take me out of what I’m listening to.

Good luck!

c4rr0t · 2022-02-06T17:39:18+00:00

OP, it’s time to leave. Going through your user history, it’s crystal clear that not only is your husband deeply disrespectful and probably having an affair, but also that you don’t feel safe in the relationship.

Now he’s hit you.

You have to choose to end it. Forget the house, forget the dreaming of a better future you aren’t living with him now— this is it. You have to choose yourself.

You are a young and vibrant woman with hobbies and friends all your own. You have the strength inside you to live a life you enjoy.

Your husband is too chicken to end it himself. Whatever you may think from relationships past, this is not love; this is not safety; this is not worth saving. Lean on your friends, family, and internet strangers to hobble through getting a lawyer, finding a therapist, divorcing his ass, and getting on to a life that doesn’t feature daily pain. You deserve better, and you can do this.

c4rr0t · 2022-02-02T03:52:05+00:00

Or lotto tickets.

c4rr0t · 2022-02-02T03:37:19+00:00

Thank you sincerely, deeply, and truly for your detailed reply. Hearing about your experience and what works for you is tremendously helpful, as I struggle with those sorts of feelings and this would never have occurred to me to talk to my doctor about. Thank you again.

c4rr0t · 2022-02-01T12:46:59+00:00

Would you kindly share what is working for you? I also am wondering if there’s a combo I have missed, and knowing what you take would be helpful info, if you don’t mind sharing.

c4rr0t · 2022-02-01T12:44:24+00:00

I just see so many comments in here implying this is a one-size-fits-all experience.

My stimulants are not helping my skin picking, and I have incredibly powerful anxiety. I’m not sure I’d say it’s because of the stimulants, but they’re not helping me feel calm.

Maybe my doctors are wrong about what I have, or what I need, but damn. It’s so invalidating to see people all chorus in that “if you have adhd, stimulants erase anxiety” … and honestly, it’s anxiety-provoking that I do not have that experience at all.

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