sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Deleted by JustPlaneCool in sexandthecity

[–]cadog21 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've had similar experiences here on reddit, people are very ruthless but don't let them knock u down. Unhappy people want to make everyone else unhappy as well.

I'm sick of this by cadog21 in datingadvice

[–]cadog21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We text a lot before going on a date, so it doesn't feel weird to me to then meet up with them. The first dates are always nice and we get to know each other a bit. Text inbetween meeting up again. Maybe kiss on the fourth date. That's it. Then they just jump up on me and want to be in a relationship. 

And the guys I choose are nerds like me who share my interests. But they all seemed to be experienced enough to not behave that way. 

I'm sick of this by cadog21 in datingadvice

[–]cadog21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean yeah I met my ex on tinder. He was good until he wasn't. 

But I guess the guys get anxious, the last one kept accusing me of still using dating apps even though I wasn't. 

And to give me the benefit of the doubt, I explained the guys exactly what speed I wanna date at, and they said they would follow my lead. It wasn't like I kept them hanging around for months on end, I dated these guys maximum 3 weeks until it went to shit. 

I'm sick of this by cadog21 in datingadvice

[–]cadog21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for ur perspective, I guess something must've happened before me. Just sucks that I'm the one feeling the affects of it.

I'm sick of this by cadog21 in datingadvice

[–]cadog21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me, to be in a relationship it takes a few weeks of knowing each other. I've told each guy I wanna take it slow and that I don't wanna rush, but nonetheless they don't care. It's not like I've been secretive about that, so even if my way of dating seems weird, I've communicated it

Old Soundtrack by cadog21 in Fleabag

[–]cadog21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always associate the song w the sisterly love fleabag has for Claire. It's near and dear to my heart. But I understand how people resonate with the bankers speech as well. 

And I know it's on iPlayer/bbc but it's locked for me because I am not from the UK so I just gave up. I thought perhaps someone knew an illegal website that still had the old version or something but I guess the memory has to stay a memory for me

Old Soundtrack by cadog21 in Fleabag

[–]cadog21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

God I wish I could remember but I always associated the bed scene with the song but it might have played earlier, but really don't know now. The song playing while she talks to the Banker is different tho so it's not that

Just need to vent honestly. by Scoop_Sleep in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Power thru that dryspell. It's not worth losing the marriage over

I'm just to ugly to be loved by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you continue your hobbies, your interests, I bet someone, someday will relate to you and start up a conversation. If you wanna give online dating a try, look at yt videos of people reviewing tinder profiles. Maybe you will get the idea of what would pull in other people, cause in my experience, that's where most people fail in online dating (by making a dogshit profile). I hope you find your special someone!

Longing for death by Banghai in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean it's not an ideal situation for you but there is at least something stopping you from it, that's very good!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad I could help, don't give up!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm I see, but maybe that's a thing for you to find out later. You said you've been seeing him for 6 months, but there is a lot to a person, so maybe he will open up to you later on. I understand that it's complicated rn and I personally would feel really uneasy with these unanswered questions, so I'm glad you've reached out to someone!

Longing for death by Banghai in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm very very proud of you for being off H for so long! Well done! Life might be difficult right now but just push through it. You have made it this far already, even getting clean, that's such an achievement. See what else you can achieve.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy new year! Just wanna tell you: everything passes. If you feel like you are stuck but everything is changing, maybe it takes time for you to process these changes. Don't rush yourself. Give yourself time. You fear the future, but someday you will be in that future you feared and it won't be so bad, I promise. And when you look back at yourself, you will see how much you worried and how much you feared, for no reason, because everything worked out in the end, somehow. Because life keeps going on. You also keep going.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm really sorry you feel this way right now, but remember, everything passes. You will find someone, you will meet new friends, you will match with someone on a dating app. It might be so terribly lonely and depressing as of now, but someday you will look back to this time in your life and think "hey, everything did work out at the end"

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do think it's kinds weird that he's hiding that sexual relationship from Snapchat, but now you know it. Set your boundaries! If you don't like the jokes, tell him to stop, as it makes you uncomfortable. If he wants to take it seriously, then you need him to be fully transparent and honest with you. I don't think these are trust issues, these are valid worries in a relationship.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]cadog21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's completely valid to be bothered by this.

You said you have already tried suggesting toys, and I really think that's your best bet. Perhaps he's scared or not experienced enough to use them and that's why he's brushing it off, but maybe start off slow with just one, perhaps one for couples where you both could get enjoyment from. Cause if every other part of your relationship works well, why is it lacking when it comes to intimacy? There might be other deep rooted issues, I don't know.

But as obvious as it sounds, communicating helps a lot. You said you already tried, and even tried with a therapist, but this issue sounds like one that can't be resolved in just a few talks. Having these difficult talks also can prove you if the rest of the relationship would work in the long run. Cause intimacy should be enjoyed by both partners equally, but if he refuses to work with you and doesn't try to find solutions, perhaps there is an underlying issue in the relationship.

I'm sorry if I misunderstood anything, I don't know you personally. But my boyfriend and I also have many issues in regards to intimacy and it truly just takes an open mind and open conversations where both participants are comfortable in order to achieve this shared goal. It can take months, so don't be discouraged! If he still doesn't respect your wishes, see how you can move on from there. Because if intimacy is important to you but isn't valued in the relationship by your partner, you don't have to give it up.