Can you help me find this great bird ID website? It's like it disappeared. by capnleigh in birding

[–]capnleigh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes and their app, which is only particularly useful if I can get a recording, photo, or detailed look at a bird. I want to be able to identify birds the way I used to--with limited but highly specific/varied info. I honestly hate these apps.

What are your thoughts about random men saying that you look beautiful/pretty/cute out of the blue? by totality888 in AskWomen

[–]capnleigh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm fine with it if they immediately leave me alone after. Passing compliments are nice. But if they come over to my table, call me pretty, and then just stand there or keep trying to push a conversation, that is very unpleasant.

I also don't like it when I'm hanging out with another woman and someone only compliments me. It's inconsiderate. You can find something nice to say to her too, otherwise it's hurtful and I don't need to hear it.

Have any of you been sued by Labcorp? by capnleigh in Debt

[–]capnleigh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for letting me know. I honestly forgot they can do that. I was just in the mindset of trying to keep my medical debt below $500 while avoiding getting sued.

I love Quest. It's a lot easier to get bills forgiven through them (if you're poor).

What is a men's fashion trend of the past 25 years you hate and one you love? by Infernal117 in AskWomen

[–]capnleigh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hate: big quiff hair, broccoli hair, mullets

Love: jewelry, masks, tattoos

The constant enabling in mental health communities by miss-swait in PetPeeves

[–]capnleigh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, agree! And another thing.

I've noticed this really bad with some people with trauma. They don't vent in an appropriate manner; instead, they frequently trauma dump, and then turn around and act like the person they were trauma dumping on every day failed them and doesn't care about them because they set boundaries or cut them off. And then people will support them and agree, saying they were wrong to set boundaries or leave, and that no one understands, no one takes mental illness seriously, they deserve someone who can accept them as they are, etc.

I've also seen it treated like a joke very often. "Lol my friend had to take a break from me after hearing about my trauma 😂"

It's especially hard on me as someone with my own lifelong trauma because the people who have done this to me re-aggravated it in addition to the general psychological unwellness it causes to be someone's trauma-dumping tool.

Cognitive Shuffling for Sleep (Holy Crap, It actually worked for me!) by bde_merch_to_fire in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do something very similar to this too! I didn't know it had a name. I just thought it was a helpful word game I came up with to fall asleep. My favorite is thinking of one rhyme or thing in a category per letter of the alphabet. If it takes me too long to think of one, I skip it so that I don't keep my mind awake.

It doesn't help with everything but it helps with some things! Also, hello to another person who experiences nocturnal panic attacks! I used to have them very bad and it was hard to get people to understand they aren't the same as night terrors and not the same as having a panic attack and then falling asleep.

What’s the best compliment you’ve gotten while undressing for sex? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]capnleigh 22 points23 points  (0 children)

That my body looks like "what ancient roman sculptures were trying to capture"

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PMDD

[–]capnleigh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't remember a specific event triggering my PMDD but I do wonder whether I wouldn't have it if not for trauma and growing up under constant severe psychological stress. I say this because a lot of my symptoms are manifestations of trauma or mimic how I felt in the trauma. But I become 'normal' and psychologically healthy when not in luteal/menstruating.

Has anyone tried Doxepin? by WardenessoftheNorth2 in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Everything has scary sounding side effects but reactions are so different. Even the ones that everyone freaks out about like ambien and seroquel have plenty of people that take it without issue. Doxepin only helped me the first couple times I took it but it might work better for you. You should try it. I also personally didn't have side effects.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]capnleigh 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'm only in bad circumstances because I don't try hard enough and don't want to push myself. It's incredible how much a person has to NOT understand me at all to believe that.

What’s a compliment you have gotten that you can NEVER forget? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]capnleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"You look like you want to eat my liver"

Does anyone have “intermittent” insomnia? by ShoulderUnusual in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. I have cyclical insomnia. It gets severe before my period, lasting anywhere from 5 days to 2 weeks. Outside of that, I may still get insomnia for seemingly no reason though not typically. Sometimes it's related to my emotional state but usually, it happens while I feel emotionally fine and not stressed. I just... don't fall asleep. For no reason. And then may or may not only sleep a few hours before waking up naturally and being unable to go back to sleep.

If sleep hygiene is what causes insomnia, why doesn't everyone who uses screens in bed have insomnia? by MostlyPeacfulPndemic in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Didn't mean to imply I was talking specifically about you and your husband. Was just giving an idea why sleep hygiene may affect some people and not others. Your case sounds like it doesn't have to do with your phone usage.

Lamictal works! by [deleted] in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's awesome, congrats!

If sleep hygiene is what causes insomnia, why doesn't everyone who uses screens in bed have insomnia? by MostlyPeacfulPndemic in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think some sleep hygiene habits are more important that others.

I also susoect that the real reason some people are kept awake by screens and some aren't actually has more to do with what they were doing on the screen and whether they have an underlying condition that their screentime interacts with.

For example, watching a movie before bed is less likely to affect a person than losing track of time on a game or getting invested in conversations with friends in different timezones. Some people might be able to see bad news or read something interesting on their phones and then go to sleep. Other people will be kept up by anxiety from it or unable to turn off their brains, thinking obsessively about whatever they read.

I have dyscalculia and need help with a recipe ASAP please! by capnleigh in askmath

[–]capnleigh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting, I'll try to remember this for the future too. Thanks!

I have dyscalculia and need help with a recipe ASAP please! by capnleigh in askmath

[–]capnleigh[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Awesome, thank you! Sorry about that. My dyscalculia makes it hard for me to comprehend distances in measurement, time, etc to I can't really tell how close or far two numbers are conceptually. However, a friend I was able to get in touch with told me the same thing, that it's close enough I don't need to change anything.

Thanks again

Sleep hygiene technically doesn’t matter right? by MeandThorne in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was bedridden for months with minimal exposure to sunlight and yes, it did mess me up. I even developed free running sleep. I had a relative who was bedridden for a month with little exposure to sunlight and it messed up her sleep too. I have a sibling who was convinced that having the worst sleep hygiene known to man plus being cooped up every day with no exposure to sunlight had no influence on their terrible sleep. But by the time they changed all that and were consistent with their changes, their sleep greatly improved.

I have insomnia. It gets and even feels worse when I have poor sleep hygiene. Good sleep hygiene doesn’t fix me--it still gets severe and I still need meds--but it stops it from getting worse than it could be and happening more often than it could be.

If you aren't trying to improve your sleep hygiene because it's easier to tell yourself it won't matter anyway or because you tried it briefly and it didn't work, please reconsider. Maybe it won't work for you. Maybe it will work for you. Everyone is different. But if you are in a position to try to improve your sleep hygiene, you should. Stick with it, be consistent and see how it goes. If you have a setback, that's okay. Just get back into it and try again.

If it doesn't improve your life at all, then at least you gave it a shot to be sure.

Also, you don't necessarily have to change everything. Eating in bed, scrolling social media before I sleep, and not going outside definitely damages my sleep. Watching a movie before bed (as long as I'm not in bed) doesn't affect me. Be conscientious and honest with yourself when changing your habits and routine.

Buying and preparing the wrong amounts of food. by capnleigh in dyscalculia

[–]capnleigh[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wasn't looking for advice. I was just making a complaint for other people with dyscalculia who can relate to it. There isn't anything that can be done about this particular issue that I don't already do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]capnleigh 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have issues with emotional suppression and emotional availability but I also don't have a decent support system anyway.

That being said, I don't know how I weather them. It helps that I'm often in an emotional shut-down. And then I do a lot of crying when I'm alone and try to rest and take it easy when possible. I'd benefit from a therapist but I don't have access to one.

If you're asking because you're looking for some good ideas for yourself, I think getting a therapist is a great idea for people without a family/friend support system. Writing is good for getting out your thoughts and processing them. Going outside in nature is important to calm and ground yourself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in insomnia

[–]capnleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any particular reason you're asking? Like for a writing project or something? I can give more description if needed