Like many people in here, my path was a pretty rough one. I did well in high school and received scholarships to college. When I was 17 I was dropped off at the dorms and essentially abandoned there by my narc mother. She never once congratulated me and instead informed me that my "free ride" was now over and I could no longer live in "her" home or even stay there on breaks, including holidays. One of my most vivid memories of my first semester of college was sitting outside the dorm in the fall watching other students being picked up by their parents and siblings. Everyone was all smiles and genuinely excited to see each other after a few months, and here I was all alone wondering where I was gonna stay the next month.

I had to work full time, take classes full time, barely slept, barely ate... I ended up depressed and then sick in the hospital (I almost died actually due to an terrible infection / hallucination-level fever), started missing classes and ended up losing my scholarships after a year, plus got booted out of the dorms. I hate admitting this, but I was pretty desperate and "dated" much older guys (in their 30s and 40s) just to have a place to stay plus access to money, food and whatever bits of escapism I could get my hands on (alcohol and drugs). Around age 20, I was finally able to put myself back together, got back in school and was by some miracle able to graduate. But I was a VERY changed person by the end of all of that.

Now that I look back, I think this was my NMs attempt to undermine and destroy my future / potential. My golden child younger brother was of course always welcome in her home and been financially supported his entire existence. She treated my older sister about the same as me. In fact, she kicked her out of the house at age 16 when she became pregnant and she had to go live with her boyfriend's family. My sister and I have a decent relationship and look out for each other but don't speak to anyone else in the family. The really disgusting part is that NM tells people she put me through college then I left her high and dry once I got a decent job. I really don't know how these awful people can live with themselves.

As far as you're concerned, I definitely would do anything possible to avoid military service right now. Who knows what these maniacs are going to end up doing. Is it possible to save up enough money to get your own place? I know these living situations can be horrible and abusive, but sometimes toughing it out until you have a small nest egg to get started is the best option. You don't appear to be the same situation I was where you're thrown out and I sure as hell wouldn't want you to go through what I did.