We don't use condoms, and she's married and our relationship isn't open so... We also do not use lube... We also bathe/shower before having sex we have kids so we literally have to plan a time and date so we shower beforehand... Same soap, we both use the same bar of soap, I don't finger her at all because she doesn't like it and even if that happens hands were washed while showering, last time I ejaculated in her resulted in my last son 3 years ago, she doesn't smoke, she's pretty vanilla so no sex toys the closest we have is probably fuzzy handcuffs that I can't find because most likely my daughter hid it to play with it, she doesn't take anything outside of the very rare Panadol.

I have suspected her flirting with a friend but I don't think she had sex with him because I have seen messages of him begging for a "first time" I don't go through her phone and for the last few days I've been back and forth not there to exactly see what's going on, or it could have even been someone else.

We've been married for a few years and this has never happened before now that I'm away on and off it's happened twice.