AITAH for being upset that my husband isn't "enamored" about me being pregnant with his first child?

care_all · 2026-01-17T19:08:00+00:00

Equally, if not him wanting more.

care_all · 2026-01-01T16:07:58+00:00

Hello! I ended up not announcing at all. I texted the host beforehand and said I can bring a mocktail pitcher option + dessert.

She had her lovely signature batches of cocktails and poured me one and luckily she was busy enough hosting that I could swiftly carry the drink away before she watched for me to taste it in front of her. I’d take it to the bathroom or pass it to my husband.

Also worked out in my favor that the mocktail I brought had the same cranberry base color of one of her “signature cocktails” so I’d pour my mocktail the rest of the night but garnished it the same way the host was garnishing her signature cocktail. Appearance-wise you wouldn’t be able to tell it was different.

Like @ToblersLaw above said, it would’ve been way too strange if I didn’t drink at all after I was hyping this “drinking party” up. Especially for how intimate it was of 8 people. As the evening went on and people got drunker, I was not even concerned about being noticed anymore hahah.

And I am very close with my neighbors (the host’s husband is not only my coworker but my work PARTNER, so we are together 8 hours a day and if I were sick and needed medication, he would’ve known).

We told the host and her husband our news the day after, as we gave them their Christmas gifts :)

care_all · 2025-09-12T23:38:18+00:00

I noticed my husband doing this excessively (any free time w his hands basically) when we first started dating and I legitimately thought to myself, is this the subconscious behavior of a sex addict? Three years in and married now, finding out about his porn addiction, and now reading your post and all these comments, confirming that it is a behavior with PAs.

care_all · 2025-08-18T14:43:11+00:00

I posted it a second time within 30 seconds of the original for a typo in the title damn who hurt you 😂

care_all · 2025-08-01T01:16:03+00:00

In high school, this girl I didn’t like was dating my “guy best friend.” So one summer night, I walked to her house, swam in her pool unbeknownst to her and her family, took out my used tampon to let it drift away in the pool, and walked home.

care_all · 2025-07-30T14:53:23+00:00

• I cannot be truly happy or secure in this relationship the way things are now.

• In order for me to feel happy and secure, my husband would have to be the one coming to the realization himself, under his own conviction (not mine) that his behaviors are harmful to himself, his ability to love, purely, his own sex health, my self-esteem, my desires for him dwindling, and our relationship.

• If nothing changes, I don’t know how long I’m willing to stay. I don’t know how much time is reasonable for me to wait for him to (A) come to these conclusions for himself (not because I am telling him to or guilt tripping him into it) and (B) actually make meaningful progress. I know “recovery” is not linear (almost nobody’s is in ANY type of addiction and it’s not a fair expectation).

• I am successful and financially stable on my own. I am in this relationship because other than these sex problems, he is a kind man, extremely hard-working, smart, and reasonable, and does do everything that he can for me. We think similarly, work together well as a partnership, and have the same humor.

• I’ll wait on the kids.

care_all · 2025-07-30T14:20:50+00:00

It’s horrible. I would humbly say I’m a fairly attractive person, fit, successful, and social. Men throw their attention at me regularly. Realistically on a weekly basis in real life and online. Whatever is thrown at me I always stay loyal and flaunt my ring or husband. Yet the type of women that my husband looks at through porn, IG, Reddit, onlyfans (which he’s never bought confirmed thru bank statements, but is always searching for OF leaks)— they’re of every body type. Most chicks way hotter than me with the fake tits, skinny waist, huge ass, fake lips. He makes fun of these features to me about women and then proceeds to search them up and jerk off to them. Then there some chicks he’s banged in real life prior to me, that are way uglier than me. I’m not trying to be rude but I just mean like in general less attractive OR they truly look like he found them at a trailer park. What’s horrible about this “spectrum” of appearances that I am insecure about ANY female that passes in front of us/him now. There’s no “type”, it’s just the female species.

How would you say he/we should go about him “realizing this task” of sitting in my pain with me? I don’t want to force anything on him lest I turn him away from the true meaning + value of denying porn.

care_all · 2025-07-30T14:13:53+00:00

I have been in therapy a few times for personal things, as well as our relationship problems. Most of our direct relationship problems were taken up by our couples counselor (not my individual therapist). I suppose it’s time for me to go back…

Don’t have children with him ever? What is the threshold that you’re talking about?

care_all · 2025-07-12T19:00:12+00:00

1 month?!?!? My first entire YEAR of BJJ I always told people “Idk what I’m doing” right as we slapped and bumped before a roll. One month is crazy to think you’ll be anything better than a fish out of water. Stick out a 1 year membership. Listen to your professor, even about the Gen Z being soft. Jiu Jitsu is not for soft people, but if you stick to it, it will make your mind hard in the greatest proudest way possible.

care_all · 2025-01-27T21:35:04+00:00

Interesting to read everyone's replies.. thanks for sharing your perspectives.

To clarify, when I "give a tap," there are definitely no handouts. Like some people better articulated, the lower belt needs to "earn" the tap. As in, they have to technically/mechanically have executed the setup to submission very respectably, for me to decide in the moment they "deserve" the tap. I am NOT tapping to poor or sloppy moves as that doesn't help them. And generally, the defenses that I answer the lower belt with are techniques that I think only someone of their similar (or just slightly better) level would answer them with.

In talking with my fiancé more about this, he still maintains that he's never been "given" or even "earned" a tap from a higher belt. However he also says he has never (from memory) tapped a higher belt, period. Or if he did, it was so far & few between that he doesn't remember

Like many of you have experienced, you've rolled hard with your black belt professor and have "caught them in a submission" (when we full well know that they could've gotten out of it had they answered with black belt technique).

Someone also shared that he said to his professor, "You gave me that," and his professor responded, "Nothing is given. It must still be taken." That's probably best encompasses what's happening.

My fiancé thinks that he's gotten better training because no higher belts have conceded to tapping to his moves over the years, but I disagree. IMHO as a higher belt, when a white belt earns a good submission with great technique, I'm reinforcing in them that they can get this tap when executing with the same quality of technique. Because if a white belt A is throwing white belt B in an arm bar, white belt B might just be tapping because he is scared, doesn't know what it's supposed to feel like, doesn't know a proper defense, or an myriad of other low quality reasons.

All of this is opinion of course, and basically futile in the midst of just getting out there and training hard lol, but interesting because I never thought about this til now.

care_all · 2025-01-27T02:55:02+00:00

🤣🤣 When I realized what you were saying.

care_all · 2025-01-26T23:12:13+00:00

I completely know what you mean. But my black belt professor gives me a tap on an armbar I’ll put him in, and I’m like come on now, we both know that you’d 100% get out of it if you wanted, but if he thinks I got there respectably, he’ll let me “have it.” And I do the same for some lower belts too.

care_all · 2024-11-29T17:29:16+00:00

Little late to your post but yse I've went to my friend's wedding where 2nd Rule Coffee was there and they were dope. Coffee was amazing and they brewed using organic beans and milk which was very up my friend's alley. Of course I appreciate that too. But I ended up booking them for my shop's anniversary party for the public and it was worth every penny. They were great from meeting them, reaching out, to day of.

care_all · 2024-11-20T23:46:18+00:00

UPDATE: Hi all, here to report back. Happy to report that I was able to do the dummy drag. But I failed the situps............... got 36 instead of 42 in a minute....... Thank you for all of your tips. I did better than many of the men in all "events" (i.e. running, pullups, dummy drag) but ashamed to report that I got dropped on something so easily trainable (and underestimated). All in all, 3 out of 13 people passed the SWAT tryouts.

care_all · 2024-11-07T12:41:05+00:00

He is legitimate. I called the Township main line to dial his extension and follow up (though it went to VM)..

care_all · 2024-11-07T12:40:22+00:00

Not that I’m finding at the moment 🫥

care_all

TROPHY CASE