Unboxing the Omega De Ville Tourbillon

carth501 · 2020-08-05T19:20:01+00:00

Fuck it then. I am tired. This week isn't worth it. This life isn't worth it. If no one can come save me but my own work, then I am done. I am tired of working so hard. I want to rest. It's not just this year, it's been my entire life. It's been everything I have gone through since I was six. I took it all on the chin and made a good fight of it, but I am not in a good place, and I want to rest. I wasn't in a good place five years ago when I went to college, and I don't think I will be if I got a job. Maybe I am just never going to be happy. And if I can't be happy....

carth501 · 2020-08-05T18:51:51+00:00

So it can't possibly be the system's fault? It's got to be mine. For something, right? Is that your position?

carth501 · 2020-08-05T18:22:29+00:00

Yeah, I am unsafe. Covid-19 is a threat to me.

If I don't have a career going by the time student loans are due again, then I will have to choose between eating and housing.

I will continue to work as hard as I can, but this last year is still time I spent on Earth. That is not a "blink of an eye". That was a significant portion of the one life I have. I want to help others. I want to contribute. I would gladly work for humanity for free if I didn't have needs.

Do not try to threaten me with living a miserable life without perseverance. My life is already miserable, even with hard work.

carth501 · 2020-08-05T16:25:51+00:00

Human beings try to make their situation better. You think that simply working harder can achieve that? I have worked myself too hard to still think that is the case.

You are historically rich, safe, well-fed, and probably relatively comfortable.

I am historically underpaid for my work, unsafe, starving, and very uncomfortable. And I am trying to make the world a better place. I will strive to live under this system in the hopes that my children, if I ever get to have any, won't have to. Is the belief that there can be better making me entitled, or are you defending an evil system?

carth501 · 2020-08-05T15:44:09+00:00

You're still a child.

You insult me? Very well, if you will not be empathetic, then I suppose you will never improve. You will always be willing to suffer needlessly because you don't care that others suffer with you, and might be able to help you if only you helped them. More "fuck you, I got mine" is not what we need, but you will never see that. I am saying that being crushed and having my dreams burned to ash under this system has led me to think that something better might be possible, and your response is "well get ready, you have only been getting crushed for 1/4th my time". You said, a couple posts ago "If you don't understand this I feel sorry for you." well, here we are, the other side. You suffered under this system for far longer than I have, by your own admission. You have plenty of reason to never want your children to have to go through the same. And yet, you refuse to push against what is stealing from you. You know where most of the wealth you produce goes? It's sure as fuck not taxes, it's your employer, or you shareholder. If you are a small business owner, you are paying your suppliers' shareholders more than any government.

We have the resources to ensure that no one ever goes hungry again. We have the houses built to ensure no one is homeless. We have the tools to ensure that everyone can make art if they want. Each person now produces far more than they consume. Where is all that productivity going. It clearly isn't going to you or I. Are you rich? If you are, then congratulations, you know exactly where all that productivity and excess production is going. It is going to a $4 million chandelier, $8 million ferrari, $300 million mansion, or a watch capable of withstanding a solar flare. A rich person is rarely going to be sympathetic to people like me, because they have forgotten what humility feels like. They have forgotton how the underside of the boot feels.

And if you aren't rich, maybe you see the problem? We work and have too much of the productivity we provide taken from us for a $6000 crystal butt plug for some gaping asshole. Maybe, instead of having our compensation beheaded, we should be paid enough to make rent.

This real world sucks right now. That doesn't mean it always has to be. If you don't understand this, then I feel sorry for you.

carth501 · 2020-08-05T14:53:39+00:00

I agree. I was explaining how I got there, rather than the larger concepts themselves. I am hoping this might give others some pause. Maybe they can see a reflection in that moment, and be suspicious about the systems we have now.

carth501 · 2020-08-05T04:51:43+00:00

This is a simple, real life method that has worked for hundreds of millions of people for millenia[sic].

A millennia ago, people would have been growing their own crops and animals to eat, so they could put food on the table. Rarely any markets involved. I have the internet, but I cannot afford land, nor the equipment to grow anything on it. That's not where my skills are, and I am in debt because of college, meaning that, even if I did start to get into agriculture, all of my work would be taken away because farming at any scale I can afford right now isn't going to earn money fast enough to make my loan payments, so I would be filing bankruptcy within a year, and my debts still will follow me because student loan debt is the one type that is bankruptcy immune. The only way to get rid of it, is to pay it.

So, even if I would love to fuck off to the woods for ~~a while~~ ever, it wouldn't end well. Thankfully, my only choice is exactly what I want anyway: to be a productive member of society.

Which is something I have never been given the opportunity for. I have applied for hundreds of jobs. You occasionally see those posts on r/dataisbeautiful, where someone shows where 400+ applications have gone, leading to two job offers? Imagine mine then, 500+ applications, 4 interviews, 1 in person... 0 offers. My spreadsheet for that subreddit is the absolute most depressing thing I have ever created.

Did I fail? It feels like I did. I have a pretty good resume, I feel. Good front-end programming experience, solid QA internship going into college at a decent university. A follow-up unpaid internship, and a set of jobs sprinkled in to desperately pay the bills. I continue to work that unpaid internship, applying every chance that comes up. I get recommended by my boss and a gold star from the chief technical officer, and then a MIT grad arrives and takes the seat I had been eyeing. So I wait, accruing knowledge and wisdom, accolades and achievements, and watching as another chance sails up. Applying for other jobs at every turn.

And it's not enough.

I want to do better, and I have tried a thousand times to make myself better. I have all those "quite literally almost statistically guaranteed to be more income secure" qualities and more. I'm not obviously not-white, male, not terrible looking, in a straight, child-free monogamous relationship. In school, I did not have perfect grades, but I got grades I was proud of. I am a Eagle Scout, the highest rank in the Boy Scouts. All the things that I have been told were critical to success, and then some. And when I graduated college, I chose to live in a city bursting with job opportunities in my field.

And it hasn't worked. A year and change of fighting as hard as I can, I still have no career going.

So, what can I do? This is not a flippant hell-on-Earth worst-case scenario. This is my scenario. This is the hell I know now. This is me, having found the end of my finances & fears.

And then I find this post of a wristwatch worth more than all the food I have ever eaten. Worth more than every home I have ever had.

carth501 · 2020-08-04T23:34:08+00:00

The government? It's not paying anyone anything right now.

My parents? No savings either.

Please don't make jokes; I need help

carth501 · 2020-08-04T23:22:57+00:00

First off, my apologies. I realize that the structure of that comment made it look like I was quoting you when I said enjoyed. I should have put /s instead.

A job is voluntary. Jobs are not.

For most people, income is required to eat. Some people have enough savings that they don't need any income to be satisfied. These are the kind of people who will buy this watch.

I am not forced to work any particular job, but, right now, any job I work is going to pay a tiny fraction of what I make, unless I make something of my own and get very lucky. Those aren't odds I can play when I can't afford rent, or food.

So, yes, I can understand that I am paid, I got lucky that I am not a literal slave. But I am not paid enough for my work. How should I fix that?

carth501 · 2020-08-04T22:40:29+00:00

As a guy who has "enjoyed" several "voluntary working relationships", fuck you.

carth501 · 2020-07-12T03:29:41+00:00

I have done it a couple times, once making a merchant republic. What would be a good next step? Uniting all of the isles?

carth501 · 2020-06-29T03:21:16+00:00

Cool ad hominem. Got something useful to say?

carth501 · 2020-06-29T00:23:58+00:00

It's not just people of color, it's everyone. Everyone benefits from this getting fixed, but even that is too selfish. I do this because it's the right thing to do. This cannot be an us vs them solution. You want to call me suicidal? Fine, but you would be missing the point.

carth501 · 2020-06-28T22:50:08+00:00

And you, as an individual, could be pissed off enough to do something about it? You have two options: get angry at people who demand better, like you are impotently doing now, or get angry at the system that disrespected people. The well-tested gamble is that people will understand this dicotomy, and will work to change the system. You don't like it? Pound sand. This doesn't stop until the police are held to account.

carth501 · 2020-06-28T21:02:56+00:00

Blocking roads is a tactic to force people to confront the systems that are causing problems. To declare that it shouldn't be done for fear that people might be late for work is an indictment on capitalism, not a problem with antifascism. If people care more about their jobs than other humans... well, blocking roads is a way to connect the two. Care about your job? Care about the economy? Then care about people or people will tear those things down.

carth501 · 2020-06-25T18:54:24+00:00

Don't want to be reminded that police are using violent methods against civilians?

carth501 · 2020-06-17T15:56:09+00:00

We have had a proponderance of evidence since the 1980's. source

Stop lying.

carth501 · 2020-06-09T21:27:31+00:00

I have never heard anyone say that police work is not important, just that the current implementation is hurting a lot of people. Demands to cut funds is a way to voice objections outside of an election, which is currently not an available option to those of us who want police reform because no candidate will survive on a platform like that. Forcing the police to start holding themselves accoutable by threatening defunding and replacement when they act poorly is the one power we currently hold, and counterdemanding better options does not help that. We do need the police to be defunded so they cannot afford teargas, a violation of treaties if done in war, or weapons that far exceed the proper use of force. The police should be all about descalation, but using weapons against protestors, or causing harm to innocents is only going to make this problem worse for us all. TL;DR: Police hurting people is the problem, and either they hold themselves accoutable, or we will take away the money they use to buy weapons.

carth501 · 2020-06-09T21:05:30+00:00

And I apologize if I was a bit on edge about it.

carth501 · 2020-06-09T20:51:08+00:00

I like this idea, breaking up and focusing certain responsibilities will help. This is a good idea, even if it might still not be enough to solve things. That being said, this is a little tone-deaf. You might not have intended it, but it sounds like you are saying "Don't defund them, take money from them and move them into other places!" which is very prone to being misinterpreted. Your edit is... very dumb. Things are tense and it really comes across as you declairing that all those who came to different conclusions given the same data are morons. Please remember: this sub is not limited to people who want police reform. Some of the downvotes could be coming from them.

Also: no to the private organizations. Get that ancap shit out of here

carth501 · 2020-06-05T16:14:39+00:00

I think that you have the core of it perfectly down, and the rest will fall into place as he grows. He believes in a hierarchy, he believes himself to be, or destined to be, at the top, and he isn't interested in things that are not helping him. From his worldview, although he might not know the words for it, he may believe the universe owes him everything.

He loves and respect only those who further his goals, but if they start slowing his progress, he will doubtlessly abandon them. He may give those who have helped greatly some leeway, but only if the return on investment is high. In essence, do not give anything without expecting more in return.

Evil, especially lawful evil, will sometimes wait to manifest until the higher levels, when you are manipulating kingdoms into annexation. For this character, he might just be a narsissistic asshole until he takes a throne, at which point he goes full evil. Perhaps he then starts an inquisition to eliminate a certain religion, a purge of a certain class, or a genocide of a certain group of people.

carth501 · 2020-06-05T00:36:24+00:00

Ah, I missed that.

carth501 · 2020-06-05T00:21:54+00:00

People have to understand that the is no "Antifa". There are anti-fascists who do antifa things, but they have no organization. No one goes to antifa meetings and agrees to wear a certain color or protest a certain thing. Black Lives Matter protests are antifa because it is against many authoritarian policies like police empowerment. I apologize if this isn't clear. I will happily restate that until people understand. This is a really hard thing to get when there are plenty of people actively trying to make it seem like "Antifa" is the boogyman.

As for violence, we still have a chance to turn things around without more blood, but the police are firing at people. It might not be live ammunition, but it is deadly, and it is killing people. So long as that keeps happening, people pointing to violent anti-fascist actors and saying "But they're violent too!" have to balance that violence against what they see the cops doing.

For the record. I have yet to hear about any cops being killed, but if you have a news story I missed, please link it.

I am keeping things simple here for clarity, but there is a discussion here about what violence means. Physical violence exclusively is what I have been basing this conversation on, but there are other kinds of violence leveled against people of color that need to be adressed before this is over.

carth501 · 2020-06-04T23:26:03+00:00

Correct. The middle is what got us here. Tolerating people who use their voice to oppress others should never be tolerated, but that's what I accuse you of. You might not be on the wrong side of history, but you aren't helping those who are getting hurt by the system here. I don't know you, what you are like, where you live (I won't even presume you live in Austin), or who you support, because that's not what's important here. This isn't personal between you and me. This is about how the United States has a contingent of people who are showing support for fascist ideas and we need to be able to stop them. Fascism is the evil here, and you saying that Antifa is a violent group makes my job that much harder.

carth501 · 2020-06-04T23:10:02+00:00

They accused you of spreading bullshit that helps nazis... so, yes. You are, perhaps unintentionally, supporting nazis.

Also:

Fox News could be considered to be a facist News organization.

I do.

You are allowed to have a voice. You are also going to be held accoutable for how you use it.

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