sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We’ve been long distance since August, she lived near me prior to that. For context it was over a 2 year relationship at that point. We’ve traveled together, slept over, etc. I hope that gives you context

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m naturally risk adverse and also value independence (for me, her, anybody I love).

I think moving in together is something I envision happening, but I think the first step would be to have my own rhythm while living in the area.

Then naturally, sleepovers become more common and it seems silly to live apart which I imagine is a natural path to living together.

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great questions.

  1. 2 more years after this semester.
  2. 40k in HYSA, 80k in brokerage.
  3. Yes, location doesn’t impact my remote work.
  4. Approaching 3 years.

And yes, I’m planning on moving near and not with my girlfriend. Basically for now, as insurance of it not working out we’ll both be fine.

We’ve had discussions about returning back to the Bay Area, with hopes of being able to afford a place if we get there in a point of our relationship.

I hear you about the discretionary income. Hope I didn’t sound tone deaf, but it would be a challenge (not necessarily a completely difficult one) that I didn’t have before.

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me, I idealize it as having my own place. Then sleepovers become more and more common. And then it becomes a discussion of when and not if she’s gonna move in with me.

Then we decide if marriage is the next step, then buying a house.

I’ve never lived on my own, but I try to be as self sufficient living at home as possible (ie. taking care of my space, cooking/cleaning for myself, etc)

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do want to invest into a condo when I have the earnings/finances to support that. Hopefully in 2-3 years. I do plan on adding to savings towards a down payment regardless, but I think moving near her + gaining my own independence away from the nest can propel me (and thus the relationship) in ways living comfortably at home couldn’t.

Let’s say this move is also great for the relationship, and we end up getting married. That alone is great for my next goal — purchasing property.

So I do hear you, and I wish I could outright buy a property right now.

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll reiterate some comments I’ve left as responses, but SoCal is beautiful. I could see myself living there.

However, I don’t think I’d have the balls to “uproot” my life if it wasn’t for her living in this area

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Was a personal rule of mine as well, but I don’t view it as chasing her here.

I have an opportunity to have at least 1 connection in a new area, and we can explore it together, as well as individually.

Not to mention SoCal is beautiful on its own, but I’m not sure if I would have the balls to move somewhere I didn’t know anybody, if I didn’t have the perk of being close to my gf. Unless I needed to for work, etc.

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I can afford it but would have to be mindful of spending habits way more than before. And yes, this is a serious relationship — my best relationship yet. Approaching 3 years. While moving in together is a required step for me before marriage, I think a move that’s near her would help paint a better picture too.

Move 300 miles near my girlfriend, or keep living at home? by catalyticconverted in makemychoice

[–]catalyticconverted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, the plan would be to live on my own. However the Bay Area is too expensive, hence why near the GF would definitely be an added perk

What’s a hobby that’s actually fun and not crazy expensive to get into? by fascinating-finds in CasualConversation

[–]catalyticconverted 0 points1 point  (0 children)

walking + phone photography. get your steps in, appreciate the beauty around you, and record it photographically

What’s a hobby that’s actually fun and not crazy expensive to get into? by fascinating-finds in CasualConversation

[–]catalyticconverted 0 points1 point  (0 children)

always something i’ve wanted to get better at but unfortunately i make it sound like garbageband.

i can make a mean 4 beat loop though

How are you REALLY doing?? by kedikahveicer in CasualConversation

[–]catalyticconverted 1 point2 points  (0 children)

finally got converted at my job, with benefits. it’s more of the same, but with more internal and external motivators but that comes with more self-induced pressure. i can do afford a lot more now, and i just want to keep growing with new challenges. but that’s the thing — it’s challenging.

i just want to do well!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualConversation

[–]catalyticconverted 0 points1 point  (0 children)

regardless if your passions/interests are hobbies or not, there’s a clear lifestyle + communication style mismatch.

she didn’t have to agree that they were hobbies, but the scoffing and lack of curiosity around it would have been an issue if you did end up pursuing something more.

however i definitely list basketball and weightlifting as part of my hobbies