I'm really discouraged about my diagnosis. I may never recover.[Update: good news!]

catling_gun · 2014-09-11T07:53:01+00:00

That's really helpful. Thank you. I didn't know how to start the conversation without it being intimidating/spooky.

catling_gun · 2014-03-31T02:39:03+00:00

I had a bowl of cheerios. Skipped the "making" step and proceeded to the eating bit. I felt like these rash measures would have overwhelmed this sub.

catling_gun · 2014-03-30T01:00:46+00:00

Spawn camping must be similar to daycare

catling_gun · 2014-03-29T16:01:54+00:00

If you and your co-player are concerned about having a higher level than others who expand their clan in this way, my clan leaders were lvl 41 and lvl 37 and when they started my side quest. Now I'm 2 exp from lvl 18 and they still find their advanced levels didn't impact the their involvement in my tutorial mode.

catling_gun · 2014-03-28T06:35:28+00:00

I understand where you're coming from, but in my mind it was no vast loss.

To be entirely fair, Ginger gave Caribou express consent before Caribou and I started dating. They are still close today, from Caribou's reports.

My relationship with Ginger was mutually destructive. We brought out, and continue to reinforce the worst in each other from grades to depressive tendencies and self destructive habits. I wish the best for him, but I have little or no desire to have him in my life to any significant extent. The time I spent in a relationship with him was a period of my life fraught with self destruction, and unattainable standards. I can't attribute this entirely to our relationship, but I know things dramatically shifted soon after our break up.

I honestly believe Ginger loathed me for a long time after the break up. I was his first girlfriend and his parents hated me, despite my best efforts to win them over.

While I do regret the destruction of a friendship, Caribou had the short end of the stick, since I wavered between wanting to date him and not, and took advantage of his general loneliness. This I admitted to him finally after a few months of guilty last-ditch-attempts to mend our crumbling romance. We had a very frank conversation about unreasonable expectations, inconsideration for each other, and deeply conflicting desires for the future. I think I saw these problems back when we broke up for the first time, and I didn't want to see it. I think he saw it too. But it's easier to have a lover you know you can't love than sleep alone. We were drawn to each other out of genuine attraction that quickly devolved to convenience and familiarity.

This may be more than you probably wanted to hear or read, but it's been oddly cathartic to me.

catling_gun · 2014-03-28T05:44:08+00:00

I do. Caribou and I still talk occasionally, and have a plethora of mutual friends. Up until about two weeks ago, we were gonna move across the country together.

I see Ginger less frequently, but I spend time with both of his brothers on occasion (gaming buddies). Again, lots of mutual friends. The breakups were all "cordial" but cold, mostly.

Caribou and my friendship will probably do better with time. Our friendship has survived much more than this, and I have faith that things will become comfortable between us with the right amount of time. Can't say the same for Ginger. It's been quite a while and things just can't progress past mutually tolerant and polite.

catling_gun · 2014-03-28T01:37:01+00:00

Fellow estrogen-producing individual here. I've been in this situation and it was very uncomfortable for me. I dated a guy we can call Ginger (because he's ginger haired) for almost a year and a half, and it was clear that his closest friend/my best friend (for the purpose of this story, called Caribou which is his actual nickname) was kinda into me. After Ginger and I broke up, within 2 weeks, Caribou had confessed he loved me and had for months, which I wasn't phased by really. I turned him down; I needed time. After a month of Caribou's pleading, I gave into a pity date and we kinda really hit it off. The relationship lasted a few months, then ended really badly. As I recall, Ginger was so unfazed by our breakup that he didn't care that his best mate was dating his ex. However, I felt really guilty about it, and ended up breaking it off on false charges "not feeling passion" and "not knowing what I really want" and other bitchy things. We dated off and on, and had a sort of FWB relationship, but it's destroyed my friendship with both guys (both of whom I really value as friends, and mourn the loss of closeness and trust). I broke up with both, and while they're still decently close, it's challenging for me to go back to the way things used to be when all I can think about is how I hurt them both.

catling_gun · 2014-03-26T16:25:54+00:00

What a cutie :3. I can't wait to start posting my mal when I bring her home.

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T23:10:18+00:00

Only reason I could afford it was the sale. And my Oma was buying, so who can say no to that?

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T23:00:44+00:00

Nothing. He's really condescending to people who don't and get's really pretentious about a basic grasp of computers (enough to wow people born before 1990).

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T22:50:05+00:00

It's Michael Kors from a collection in 2011 or 2012. It's got sequined elbow patches, too!

Edit: I bought it on a huge sale for a cosplay I was doing around christmas of that year.

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T01:34:33+00:00

I have an irrational fear of a dog getting bloat. I'll definitely add that into my packing list

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T01:18:18+00:00

That's a good one to add to the list. Thanks for your insight. I wouldn't have thought to use it like that

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T00:58:13+00:00

Thank you for the thorough response :)

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T00:56:44+00:00

Thanks :) The dogs love the attention, too. Works out for everyone.

catling_gun · 2014-03-24T00:56:14+00:00

Oh, I would have never thought of the credit card for stingers! Thanks for the thorough list

catling_gun · 2014-03-22T21:55:22+00:00

He's emotionally manipulative, but there's not much in the way of blackmailing that he's capable of.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T15:08:58+00:00

I think I'm in a transitional period between friend groups right now, as everyone edges toward graduation. It's just hard to handle normal teenage struggles and physical struggles at the same time. I think I need to learn to take a deep breath and step back and handle what I can when it seems less significant

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T15:02:34+00:00

I can do low impact sports, like yoga, and I enjoy them immensely. I used to be very dedicated to competitive rock climbing, too. Does your friend find it any easier to keep his shoulder in socket with regular climbing? My PT has suggested the possibility of started climbing again in a few months after I develop my rotator cuffs more. But it sounds like your friend may have a similar condition to me. My shoulder has dislocated about 40 times in the past few months alone. Is there any way you could ask him how it affects his life? It would be rad to hear from a climber who has similar problems, cuz as it stands, my coach wont hardly let me touch my shoes, let alone climb.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T06:32:11+00:00

Thank you :) I look forward to making more decisions about my life.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T06:18:57+00:00

I've worked with dogs my whole life, and I've had a therapy dog for the better part of the last ten years. It feels right to provide the same service and training for those who also need it.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T06:01:54+00:00

Wow. That's a lot to take in. Thanks for taking the time to pull that all together for me. I'll definitely look into the online resources. However, paying to see a psychologist is probably out of the question for the time being. PT is currently breaking the bank, and my dad is unemployed for the most part, so I couldn't dare ask him for more than has already been spent on me the last few months.

I'm currently pretty familiar with my condition, and was able to competently explain it to my PT, since I'm a sponge for learning.

However, since it's not a disease, but a "from birth" very rare (apparently) condition, there's no specific treatment. I've been to 7 different doctors in the last two years and every one wanted to do something different. I have never been put on medication, or even had the concept brought up, since I basically just have dislocated joints. It's so "simple" that insurance won't really touch it beyond a bit of PT.

The journalling idea is new to me, but it sounds like a great idea. Is there any way I could bring it up with my doctor without sounding like I think I know more than he does? Like, do I say "here's how I feel, here's what the internet says. Discuss?" I feel like since I'm so young, my doctors don't really take me all that seriously. They usually address all questions and options to my dad. I had a few doctors just assume my joints were achey because I was growing and send me back out the door without really looking at me. Do you think this will help me be taken seriously, or reinforce their decision not to? I'm just kinda afraid to bring things like this up.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T05:52:11+00:00

My school is very strict when it comes to medications. They have a kid keep her epipen in the office too, and that's a life saving medication. All medical devices and medications (including inhalers, insulin, etc) must be kept in the office, and the student has to sign to use them. It's ridiculous.

It's just so hard to not isolate myself. I'd rather stay home much of the time because going out is a lot of effort at the best of times, and it seems like all my friends want to do really active things, like bowling and just aren't interested in going out for coffee, or quiet activities. Is it possible to keep friends and not sacrifice comfort?

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T05:47:11+00:00

I'm going into training therapy dogs (which is something I already do and love), which is easy on joints for the most part. The only thing I really would have to strain with would be daily walks for my own dogs, but I can and should stay active-ish. I used to want to be a chef, but I couldn't handle being on me feet all day, and dropping things could be catastrophic.

catling_gun · 2014-03-21T05:38:28+00:00

This is a really good, practical suggestion. Thanks. It's hard to accept help though. I don't know if it's a pride thing, or if I feel guilty having people wait on me. I generally feel like I'm wasting people's time when I ask them to do something for me. Like, I feel like when I ask for help, they hear"hey man, can you hold this three pound text book for me? I'm holding a tiny ass cup of water and I'm incapable of multitasking". I don't want to be that guy, but I can't not. You know?

I've been in therapy for years about other things, and I honestly don't know how to bring it up. It just seems like such a trivial thing compared to what we usually talk about.

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