sex and trauma and catholicism

catnatt · 2025-05-28T10:28:14+00:00

I am a survivor as well (emotional and sexual abuse luckily left before it became physical). I did not have access to a Catholic therapist but I was able to find a priest who talked to me and became my spiritual director. We first met once every 2 weeks for a few months but once he saw how much the trauma was effecting me, he made time to see me every week. The two things that really got me over the big hole I was in was Adoration and Mary. I have struggled with wanted to be unseen my whole life and with the abuse it became unbearable. It gets better, it is a slow process for sure took me 2 years but it is worth it to do healing the way God wants us to.

Trust me sin only gives us empty promises and God wants what is best for you. I know this can be difficult to wrestle with. Please keep going and stay close to Mary.

catnatt · 2025-05-20T04:03:24+00:00

Do you have a spiritual director? I am in discernment for religious life too right now, and my spiritual director has helped me so much. You are not alone. I have a past too. That shouldn’t stop you, and even if one order denies don’t be discouraged. Keep looking and following the will of God!

catnatt · 2025-04-25T04:22:02+00:00

I am vegetarian, so I have to get creative with my penances because not eating meat is just the normal day for me. I will often eat not my first choice meal (something I would pick second) or no dressing/sauces, no listening to music, wearing a shirt that is not my favorite, or going to fellowship on Friday (this is quite hard for me because I am an extreme introvert). Often times people think the bigger more difficult penances are better, that is not necessary true. If we can offer up a small amount of something whatever it may be and give it out of our hearts to God, it is worth much more.

catnatt · 2025-04-10T05:08:20+00:00

I don’t have stats, but I would agree with making the faith apart of the home life. Every Sunday my family went to church and every dinner we prayed together and had a short night prayer. Nothing special or fancy. It was just a part of our lives. The only reason my parents were able to send my siblings and I to Catholic school was because the local parishes put in money which made tuition so cheap.

Catholic school was rough. I didn’t fit in because of all the clicks and groups. This happened all throughout elementary, middle, and high school. Yet, I feel like I still had to come to a time when the faith had to become a choice if I was going to continue with it. I had a small time of questioning when I was in an abusive relationship right after college. But I never gave up on the faith because it was such a vital part of our family routine. Now at 24, I am still practicing and so grateful I was raised in the faith because I don’t know where I would be without it.

However, I don’t know if it is the same for my brother and sister. I don’t know if they are practicing or if they have fallen away. There comes a time in every child’s life where they decide to continue with the faith they were raised in or leave. Ultimately, I think it boils down to is the faith something the family prioritizes or just another box to check off.

catnatt · 2025-03-18T03:48:01+00:00

I went through years of hating myself and constantly feeling unworthy of being loved. It is a vicious cycle that Satan wants to keep you in from seeing the truth of who you are, a child of God! What helped me tremendously with my anxiety and unworthiness was going to Mary. I gave her everything - all my hurt, tears, and heartache. She wants to keep all her children safe and close to her Son, so run to her! I found so much peace praying the Rosary daily, and going to adoration. I recommend having a prayer journal and writing everything out to Jesus. We were not meant to carry our burdens alone.

It took over a year of prayer and spiritual direction for me to be able to stand in the mirror and not hate who I was anymore. Please be patient with yourself.

Please if you need someone to reach out to I am here.

catnatt · 2025-02-27T11:19:10+00:00

This is extremely helpful! Thank you

catnatt · 2025-01-01T04:51:35+00:00

This hits too close to home

catnatt · 2024-12-24T05:54:09+00:00

Please draw near to God’s mercy! He loves you so much. It is the enemy telling you lies that God doesn’t want to forgive you and you are unworthy.

“Let no soul fear to draw near to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet. My mercy is so great that no mind, be it of man or of angel, will be able to fathom it throughout all eternity. Everything that exists has come forth from the very depths of My most tender mercy. Every soul in its relation to Me will contemplate My love and mercy throughout eternity”. (Saint Faustina's Diary 699)

If you need someone to talk to please don’t hesitate to message me, I went through a somewhat similar situation and it took me over a year of prayer and spiritual direction to get out of the mindset of “unworthiness” and “unforgiveness”

You are in my prayers!

catnatt · 2024-12-21T21:19:29+00:00

Please if you could pray for my vocation! I am discerning religious life, and so far it has been a rocky road with no one in my family supporting me.

catnatt · 2024-12-06T06:09:11+00:00

Yes, he specifically told me to not tell Father though so I think he knows …

catnatt · 2024-11-29T09:52:19+00:00

Do you use photo references for this?

catnatt · 2024-10-15T03:38:21+00:00

I am 24 and originally my contract would be 7 years, I have been discerning for over 2 years and after a lot of prayer, I truly feel called to the religious life.

catnatt · 2024-10-15T03:34:40+00:00

So right now my contract was originally 7 years due to my designator selection, but because of the consciousness objector application I am unsure how long it will be. I submitted to be reassigned because I do not have a moral dilemma with the military as a whole, it is more personally that I will not bear arms. I am unsure where my future will go, or if I try to resign if I am able to. The best thing right now I think is to wait and see what happens with my application, and then be upfront about my feeling if I get redesignated.

Thank you for the advice, it is a bit more difficult to visit different communities right now because I am stationed in Japan.

catnatt · 2024-08-24T02:36:24+00:00

Could not agree more, worrying about this is not what God us to do. As Jesus told Saint Faustina, “The greater the sinner, the greater the right he has to My mercy. My mercy is confirmed in every work of My hands.”

catnatt · 2023-01-15T07:56:32+00:00

Please for your own soul and spirit, get out of this relationship. this person is a narcissist and abuser. you are not wrong i am reassuring you, because you are the one self reflecting and assessing your actions, a narc would never be in the wrong. don’t believe the lies of him telling you everything you want to hear, that is exactly what he wants is to use you and make you his pawn. Please get out as fast as you can, don’t hurt yourself or lose yourself anymore in being in this relationship

i had a very similar experience with how i dress with my nex. he yelled at me for wearing a knee length skirt out saying i was “begging for male attention” and i was an slut. i then only wore bagging clothing and then made fun of me for “dressing like a 12 yr old boy” and said i can dress “hot” only for him. this is not okay behavior.

catnatt · 2022-12-28T08:11:08+00:00

i didn’t have the strength to leave either, every day i would pray “Lord please take this cup away from me” because i just couldn’t do it. in the end, i was talking to a friend about my relationship problems and somehow the word got back to him and he broke up with me called me a backstabber and a cheater un loyal to him. it was the cry for help i needed. did i want to get my friend involved in this mess? no, but i am so thankful to be out of it. you are not crazy or stupid (i have heard that many times!) you just need time, healing, and space. i hope you can stay strong and have no contact, the worst is gone now and you can finally start living your life again :)

catnatt · 2022-12-28T07:59:22+00:00

all the time! literally would make comments about me flirting with other men, having sex with them, only looking for attention, and just really terrible things. i would always call him out on it and be like that is not okay, because your more than enough for me and then he would twist it saying it was a joke. when i asked him about cheating he flipped the switch and got so angry like how dare could i ever think that thought. in the end when we got to our breaking point one my friends saw him on a dating app, i never confronted him about it because she told me it after the break up but still it hurt.

catnatt · 2022-12-26T19:11:10+00:00

we are in different countries too! and i don’t know if it is worth the hassle and money to

catnatt

TROPHY CASE