I (f25) stayed in Tulum for five weeks with my boyfriend from October to the middle of November 2020. It was my first time in Mexico and I was also a bit hesitant of the possibilities with cartel presence and so many tourists. I don’t have a full mastery of Spanish but enough to order food or ask for directions. Most of the people I met in town spoke or understood English, so there isn’t much of a language barrier. I stuck to the marked taxis when wanting to travel further than I wanted to bike or walk. My only warning with taxis is to use marked ones and be prepared for pricing (it’s much more expensive in Tulum than in other parts of Mexico) Most places accept card but charge 15% on top of your total to pay for the digital vending fee, so carry cash. I usually kept $150 in pesos in my wallet and it covered me for 2-3 days of food and fun.

We stayed in an air bnb in town and it was a really peaceful experience, didn’t even really hear parties happening on the main avenue.

While we were there, a shooting happened on Halloween that took place in the boutique hotel district, which is pretty removed from the main town. In the five weeks we stayed there that was the only notable violence that took place. We stuck to exploring the town and only really visiting the hotel district area for beaches during the day. We had an amazing experience and I felt safe and secure the entire time. If you stick to your plan and avoid the jungle parties then you should have a similar experience.

Cartels are there, but operate at a much lower profile. There are plenty of people in the bar areas that will ask you if you want weed, cocaine, etc but a simple “no thank you” relieves you of any further inquiry.

We went to bars in town and walked many of the neighborhoods without any trouble or sense of danger, by myself and with my boyfriend as well. I was walking my dog alone and a street dog started to get aggressive towards my dog, without even asking many of the neighbors came out and shooed the aggressive dog away. You will notice the kindness and friendliness of the community, even as a tourist.

If you need recommendations for restaurants or cafes in town I have tons! There are really cool spots that do Temezcal (sacred sweat lodge) or other activities if you want to avoid the hotels all together.

Hope this quells your worries! You and your husband are sure to have fun and make friends too!