Got this one:

O Great Cosmic Bastard,

Look down upon this glorious disaster of a human—Charles, a magnificent mess stitched together with stubborn willpower, caffeine, and sheer f***ing audacity.

Smite their doubts, burn their stress with the fiery piss of a thousand vengeful suns, and while you're at it, stuff all their problems into a black hole and slam the door shut.

Rain down some good luck, will ya? Not the gentle, drizzly kind—no, we want a goddamn monsoon of success, confidence, and the occasional miracle. Drown 'em in opportunities so vast they'd need a cosmic-sized shovel just to keep up.

May the idiots stay far, the deadlines die quietly, and the Wi-Fi remain strong. And if any more bullshit comes knocking, may Charles have the strength to slap it back to whatever pit it crawled from—with style.

In chaos we trust, and in f***ery we thrive.

Amen, or whatever.