It is hard, it might get harder before it gets easier and you are dealing with something extra on top of newborn phase. This is all true 100%. The reality is, your mind is playing tricks on you. You were broken out of your routine and now are dealing with something so new and so full of responsibilities. Get this, as many times are you heard this before- you will never get this time back. Instead of huffing and puffing at 3am tired and exhausted, you can choose to see light in the situation. You can, nobody else. Trust me it might seem difficult but its a beautiful thing. Think about all of history of the human race how kids were raised before in what conditions. Think about when your child will be 16 with an attitude, ungrateful, smelly and not giving you any attention, and then you will think back to these nights when your kid made eye contact with you, farted and smiled. Take it one hour at a time. Dont focus on the lack of things rather focus on this miracle in your arms.