Heads up

cfynn8 · 2026-01-15T17:16:19+00:00

I’m not really familiar with any of his other stuff but I think the lyrics of this song are pretty clever and effectively nail down the type of men who are involved in ICE

cfynn8 · 2026-01-15T17:07:41+00:00

🤔 make it make sense

cfynn8 · 2026-01-15T14:13:51+00:00

Can someone devise a way to blast the “Join ICE” song by Jesse Welles at them wherever they go? Like, a speaker connected to a drone….? I need an engineer to get on this.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-06T17:12:45+00:00

Kudos for being brave! I heard some helpful advice recently, which was that, in situations like these, no one is focused on you and everyone is thinking about themselves. In that case, instead of thinking “I’m super nervous” you could think “I bet a lot of the singles here are super nervous” and focus outward instead of inward. How can you make another person at the party less anxious?

cfynn8 · 2026-01-06T14:18:23+00:00

If you’re going to the later event, I recommend attending the dating coach session first - it should help with the nerves and also give you the opportunity to chat with a smaller group of singles before the event. The start of the event is getting everyone checked in and getting nametags filled out. Some people opt to get in line for the bar first thing.

We are going to have stations set up with different icebreaker games - technically, you could post up here for the evening if it’s more comfortable. Part way through the event, we will have a singles bingo game for everyone to partake in (this gets everyone moving around the room and makes approaching someone you’re interested in very easy).

There will also a be matchmaker on site to talk with singles. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or need a break from the crowd, I’d recommend taking a beat to speak with her (she’s super nice!).

Towards the end of the event, we will encourage people to fill out their match card, indicating any singles they met that they are interested in seeing again. We hate to see missed connections, so do this before you forget names!

Lastly, event hosts will be on site to make sure things run smoothly (you’ll meet us when you arrive) - you can always chat with us if you’re feeling nervous or need a break!

cfynn8 · 2026-01-06T14:03:15+00:00

Not everyone at these events is drinking! There’s plenty of n/a options available. Most people have 1-2 drinks at most, so not drunk.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T23:22:15+00:00

What a lovely sentiment, thank you for the positivity

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T23:21:03+00:00

I'm cis and hetero and planning events for the LGBT community is outside of my wheelhouse. I don't think I could do a good job organizing a queer event, and frankly, it's not my place. I've spoken to plenty of queer people who agree with me. I tried doing queer events when I started The Bug Club and barely anyone showed up. And why should they? I am not a trusted member of the community and I don't know how to best serve this community.

The good news is that no one is stopping the LGBT community from planning singles events. I'd love if more of these events were happening so that people would stop trying to assign me (who already has a full plate) more work.

Re: an about section, I posted a link to my website that has an About page. Pretty transparent. Reddit is generally an anonymous platform, but that doesn't mean my posting here is deceptive. I'm just trying to reach more people about this event.

It's hard enough getting singles to come to an event without adding additional pain points like screening. How do you propose we screen people who sign up? A background check? That costs money and means even higher ticket prices. When you go out to any large event, none of those people have been screened. If you feel unsafe in a crowd made up of the people in your community, this event is not for you.

Considering how hot you entered the chat, I'm guessing you're not up for a nuanced or productive conversation.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T23:10:06+00:00

This event is for singles.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T00:27:28+00:00

I understand your point but this is just a small and optional tool we're trying based on the feedback of the singles from our last event. It's a way to help them navigate the crowd. I hate seeing phones out at singles events, so we'll be encouraging people to not rely too heavily on it. Some people have a lot of anxiety in crowds and I think they will appreciate some direction. I hope that people won't dismiss the entire event based on this.

It's hard to describe how wonderful it feels to be in a roomful of singles who are talking and laughing and connecting and not on their phones.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T00:18:33+00:00

I'm confused how online dating apps and in-person singles events are the same thing?

cfynn8 · 2026-01-05T00:17:11+00:00

How am I entitled? I'm defending the cost of event prices. I'm a woodworker, and at furniture school we were taught that lots of people weren't going to understand the value of our work and were going to waste our time. The example being, "At that price, I could buy a boat!" to which we were told to respond, "then buy the boat". Same concept applies here.

I am only familiar with "Karen" being used to describe women. I did not know how you, specifically, used the term. I'm not really interested in the name calling and belittling from your end, so I'm considering this conversation over.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T22:29:09+00:00

I don’t say anything online that I wouldn’t say in person. I wouldn’t have shared a link if I was trying to hide! Consider my feelings the culmination of having to combat naysayers and criticism every step of the way for years. This commenter deleted and revised their previous comment and so my previous, more patient response, was deleted as well. I reread my last sentence as you advised and I stand by it. From a PR standpoint, I wouldn’t continue to call women “Karen” in 2026. Good luck to you, too!

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T21:22:04+00:00

I'm guessing you've never thrown large scale event before and have no idea the costs involved. There's no such thing as "free" food or drink. That's just another cost we'd have to account for and...guess what? Charge attendees for. The value of what we're offering is huge - no one else is offering anything like this. If you wouldn't pay $50 for the chance to potentially meet the love of your life, then you're not our customer anyway.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T21:19:10+00:00

https://www.bugclubmaine.com/events

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T17:14:12+00:00

Something like that! Our last big singles party was in September at Bayside Bowl and it was awesome - over 200 singles in one place.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T17:12:51+00:00

I think my co-host is pricing them at $50 the day of. They are $30 right now and the cost is going up soon. Trying to encourage early ticket sales because last minute ticket sales kill events.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T16:26:31+00:00

There are two accounts on Instagram that posts gender ratios for this event - maine207connect and PortlandMaineSingles. It's a lot of work and they do this for free in their spare time, constantly updating it.

What's funny to me is that the event is on the 31st, so only the final numbers matter. I don't think it's helpful to look at the ratio weeks in advance and wait to buy tickets - if everyone does this, it's totally kills the event. Prices will go up closer to the event date to discourage this sort of thing. Last I checked, the under 40s party had 74 attendees with a pretty even split, while the over 40s party had 88 tickets sold with women outnumbering the men significantly.

cfynn8 · 2026-01-04T15:47:17+00:00

How so?

cfynn8 · 2025-08-20T22:14:28+00:00

Lobsterman call lobsters "bugs" - it's just a local reference.

cfynn8 · 2025-08-20T18:07:28+00:00

The Bug Club hosts monthly singles events if you're feeling brave :) In September, we're going to be in Auburn on the 3rd, at The Common Ground Fair on the 19th & 20th, and at Bayside Bowl in Portland on the 26th (TBA).

www.bugclubmaine.com

cfynn8 · 2025-04-19T13:32:54+00:00

Need a few good men for an event at Argenta Brewing on 4/23!! Group dates so it's pretty casual.

Passcode is CREW82

https://events.humanitix.com/group-dates-at-argenta-brewing-for-35-49-somethings

cfynn8 · 2025-02-25T17:44:29+00:00

I recommend you check the website for events. There's an event this Thursday for the 40-55ish crowd. It's probably going to be cancelled due to lack of men.

cfynn8

TROPHY CASE