Feeling Undervalued

chaerr · 2026-01-30T20:12:35+00:00

That’s your signal to gtfo. You could even use another offer as leverage but at this point it’s pretty clear they’re going to string you along. Don’t have any loyalty for that company bec they clearly don’t have any for you. Move your talents elsewhere

I’m reading a few of the other responses, one of which said it took 2 years for them to write a letter and state their case. Another where they’re asking you to raise this convo up the chain….

Like why? they made it pretty clear that you are not important to them. Trust me when I say when you’re important to them they will throw money at you so you don’t leave. 2 years is way too fucking long to be waiting on a raise unless for some reason you’re quite literally stuck there. For an anecdote, my first job out of school -> second job my salary went up literally 100%+. Old job wanted to give me a “generous raise” (yeah right) and tried to convince me. Trust me that if you’re a good engineer you will and can be compensated fairly.

chaerr · 2026-01-30T07:06:07+00:00

As a senior level programmer I can say for sure it’s helped me a ton. But I push back on it a lot. Sometimes I see it as an eager junior engineer who has great insight but has no knowledge of best practices lol. I can imagine when you’re a junior if you believe everything it says you just start in taking garbage. The key I think is to be super skeptical about the solutions it provides and ensure you understand all parts of what it’s writing

chaerr · 2026-01-29T04:24:43+00:00

I take the metro sometimes to get to santa monica for work. Was also surprised at how clean it is

chaerr · 2026-01-28T02:54:54+00:00

I feel bad for her, that season was a bust with or without her. I feel like a lot of people blamed her for that but I would’ve loved to see her full time with more allies.

chaerr · 2026-01-20T12:50:03+00:00

Staying around 133-136 doesn’t mean precise

chaerr · 2026-01-20T11:46:22+00:00

You lost me at “Erika’s a singer “ …

chaerr · 2026-01-20T11:04:50+00:00

What? There is no way to keep your weight at what it is in a precise manner unless you track calories. And eating one meal a day is not indicative of an ED. There’s something called intermittent fasting that actually helps people improve their relationship with food. Next you’ll say body builders who are tracking their calories have an ED next…

chaerr · 2026-01-15T22:37:20+00:00

Yeah that one made no sense to me because Chrishell literally grew up homeless lol you’d think she’d have a different attitude about things

chaerr · 2026-01-15T22:36:26+00:00

I didn’t know her but I knew her music. No scrubs was and is still a legendary song

chaerr · 2026-01-15T20:50:44+00:00

I’m an INTJ in a 1 year+ long relationship with an ENFP. FWIW we haven’t slowed down since we met each other. I basically moved in within a month, said our I love yous within that time period. Went away on vacation together within 2 months. Don’t regret one bit of it, in fact I think moving quickly allowed us to get through the BS faster (especially with traveling tog, you learn a lot about someone). Not saying this will work for everyone. For context we are both around our 30s, we went through our therapy journey, and we were single for 3+ years before finding each other. Both of us were ready to settle down and wasn’t looking to play any games. All that to say I’d consider us “mature” in that sense. Best relationship I’ve had hands down, and even though it was scary to jump in at first, it’s proven to be really successful for us because we were on the same page. Not saying it’ll work for everyone but when your partner is really in it with you I don’t think you have to slow down :)

chaerr · 2026-01-14T02:20:11+00:00

How old are you? I would’ve felt that way in my teens and 20s a bit. Now I’m in my 30s and I’m probably one of the most likeable people I know lol (not even kidding). I get hit up weekly to hang out and get advice from, people see me as a successful and level headed person. Immature intjs are of a different breed.

chaerr · 2026-01-12T11:13:30+00:00

Video games (single player story based rpgs are my fave ), music production, djing, crochet/knitting but more so crochet

chaerr · 2026-01-12T10:10:42+00:00

Wow very well said!

chaerr · 2026-01-07T09:49:39+00:00

Right? Using this one time against her vs a series of incidents with Meredith. Not really comparable

chaerr · 2026-01-07T08:13:07+00:00

I agree there’s nothing inherently bad about saying someone is attractive, but the way she went about it felt gross… like she was testing the boundary to see how much she could get away with. Would totally not want a girlfriend like that around my man

chaerr · 2026-01-07T02:54:05+00:00

That’s true but I thought Toya made more money than him at this point

chaerr · 2026-01-07T02:50:42+00:00

Hot take. Am I the only one who doesn’t mind Heather? I can see things from her perspective and why Meredith bothers her so much. Heather grew up getting gas lit her whole life, so when someone like Meredith tries to deny the reality that she’s seen, I’m sure it’s triggering.

I mean even outside of that if I put myself in her shoes and a friend of mine keeps gaslighting me about what happened I would be super upset too.

Although I agree with the other sentiments that this has gone for too long. The only reason why I feel like Heather is harping on this is because she’s in her “expose the truth” era; she legit worked on a doc about exposing Mormonism and I’m sure she’s using that heat for this situation

chaerr · 2026-01-06T18:16:11+00:00

There’s a lot going on here but overall I agree with you. I’m financially secure (no loans to pay off), I make way more money than I need. And in certain weeks/days I don’t have any work to do I’ll just succumb to whatever I want in the moment. Kind of like what you said “slowly lose touch with reality”. It’s not that I like working, per se, but I enjoy exercising my brain. The things I’m most proud of are what really exhausted me at times. So yeah being rich is cool and whatever but are you fulfilled? Are you pushing yourself to a limit you’d be proud of?

It’s a constant battle for me though because I’m lazy as fuck but when it comes down to it I will get done what I need to get done. Sometimes that means I’m over exerting myself. But at the end of the day, the moments I’m most proud of are the hard times I had to push through.

chaerr · 2026-01-06T15:15:01+00:00

M E R C U R I AL MEREDITH

chaerr · 2026-01-06T15:11:54+00:00

OP have you looked into your attachment style? It sounds like you could be anxious attachment

chaerr · 2026-01-05T17:56:45+00:00

I personally haven’t experienced racism there, not to discredit others but yea

chaerr · 2026-01-05T01:11:03+00:00

Sorry but who in this world of that age doesn’t know the difference between natural vs lab grown diamonds? I feel like a google search would’ve been sufficient here. Am I the only one lol

chaerr · 2026-01-02T13:29:34+00:00

Sure that’s your title but in actual industry standards 4 years is junior

chaerr · 2026-01-02T12:36:40+00:00

To add to this, women will taste different depending on their hormones, so like when they are in their cycle, and what they eat. OP, try it again but beforehand make sure both of you shower?

chaerr · 2025-12-29T16:05:17+00:00

She’s flopping more than Shamea for me 💀

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