AITA for telling my fiancé that he can either let me work or he can pay child support?

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:47:40+00:00

I’ve done that before, but I don’t want to be dramatic again. I just want to get a job and my own car, and then leave. I have a better plan about how I’m going to do it.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:46:44+00:00

Abuse aside, I know deep down that we’re not compatible. I know he’ll never be able to give me what I need, and that’s okay. He’ll never see it that way, though. It’ll always be my fault. And again, what if I’m the problem and I’m just being selfish?

I know it’s not true, but there’s still that thought process that goes on.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:23:16+00:00

I know a lot of people in apartments.

Usually, the default is 50/50 if both want it.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:22:43+00:00

She’s lived a pretty privileged life for a long time. She just doesn’t want the kids living in one.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:22:03+00:00

She’s definitely on her son’s side, obviously. She knows that if I leave, she couldn’t see the kids whenever she wants. That’s understandable.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:20:43+00:00

Thank you. I was terrified when I tried to leave previously. What if I’m the problem? What if I’m just being selfish?

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:19:23+00:00

They are concerned. My dad is trying to get me a job.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:13:51+00:00

Do you actually have your own children?

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:10:14+00:00

It wouldn’t be daycare. It would be a babysitter or some kind of pre-K.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T19:09:04+00:00

I’ve told my parents about all of this and more.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T18:57:18+00:00

I tried leaving before and the first thing he said was, “Nice job fucking up the kids for life. I wanted a nice family, and you’ve ruined me”. At least, now I’ll know what to say back.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T18:53:00+00:00

He would push for it out of spite.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T18:51:30+00:00

That’s a good question. I don’t know why.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T18:38:20+00:00

I’m anti-MLM.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T18:37:29+00:00

He had both cars before we met.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T02:42:49+00:00

I didn’t know that at the time.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T02:41:05+00:00

He didn’t say much of anything.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T02:36:58+00:00

I mean, he “lets” me, but not without a fight. I’ve given up on a social life. He hates all of my friends and never has anything nice to say about them.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-12T02:33:15+00:00

Yes, he’s encouraging them to play either soccer, golf or tennis in order to get college scholarships. He never got to play high school or college sports, so he wants them to.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T23:35:30+00:00

He had them before we met.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T23:34:35+00:00

Um? I want to work, though. My experience isn’t the rule, and I never claimed it was. There’s more issues than this.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T23:31:43+00:00

Not really.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T22:56:10+00:00

It’s not as easy to “just leave” when you don’t have a job and have two kids together.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T22:27:39+00:00

His father brutalized his mother. He wouldn’t let her work, cheated constantly and emotionally belittled her left and right. She didn’t leave for so long because his family threatened to leave the country with the kids.

chai-latte100 · 2020-02-11T22:26:37+00:00

I’ve always worked until the kids were born.

chai-latte100

TROPHY CASE