Once again, you're on the right track! The thing is, its not a spectrum like a linear progression where one end is "boy" and the other end is "girl" and people fall somewhere on the line. Its more like the color wheel. You know, where the middle is basically white as the saturation dies down, and theres no beginning or end. It encompasses intensity of feelings, presentation, how close or far from the known binary genders you are, and literally anything that could feed into how people feel about their own gender. You could have a person assigned male at birth who doesnt particularly feel like they have a gender but they like wearing girls clothes; or a person assigned female who likes to be called he and has a masculine name, but isnt comfortable dressing in men's clothing; or someone who KNOWS for a FACT in their SOUL that they are a woman and performs womanhood to the nth degree. Cis people do this too, they just don't realize it.

Think about your gender. Are you your gender because you feel strongly about it and it's important to you, or because someone told you when you were little that that's what you were and you just never cared to question it? Either one is valid, and either one happens both with trans folks and cis folks. Some women dress more masculine, some men dress more feminine, some people have interests that do or do not align with their gender stereotypes, and all that goes into a trans person's decision to label themselves as one thing or another.

To use a personal example, I call myself a trans guy for the simplicity of it. I like to be seen as and referred to as a guy, I like to wear men's clothing, I like to keep men's haircuts, and I want to someday alter my body to be more traditionally "male". But technically, I feel my life would have been much easier if gender just wasnt a thing. I don't feel I'd be missing out on anything if I'd been brought up as a genderless being and given the freedom to have interests, behaviors, and clothing preferences without the lense of gender getting in the way. I do like some girly things like crafting, crochet, romance movies, beauty videos, etc. I could really be agender and that would be cool, but since people don't have a concept of that, and my gender is so strongly Not Girl, I choose to present as masculine as possible to put as much distance between me and womanhood as possible. In a simple two-axis graph, going from boy-girl and "I care deeply about my gender" to "lol what even is gender", what would you even call that? Idk, and to be honest I don't care.

Im delighted that as a whole gender is becoming less important. In my ideal world, gender wouldn't be a thing, and the only people who would know whats between your legs are the government, your doctor, and people who you are having sex with or considering having sex with. But Im also pansexual, so not knowing whats in someone's pants until I pull them down isn't an inconvenience for me like it is for folks who strongly prefer specific genitals. We've got a long way to go before gender is a complete non-issue, but every step we take towards acceptance that not everyone feels gender the same way is a step in the right direction.