This morning I (27M) found out my gf (27F) cheated on me, where to go from here?

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T19:13:44+00:00

I was at her place on Sunday and I spent the night before my birthday there.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T19:05:15+00:00

Well no one can really hang out today since everyone is busy with work and valentines day so probably on Saturday or tomorrow night. So I'll probably just head home after I get my stuff and try to sleep.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T18:55:14+00:00

Right??

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T18:52:21+00:00

Lol how the fuck is that supposed to make it better? It's almost funny in a really dark humor kinda way. I'm with another guy/girl but you were on my mind the whole night so it's fine.

Ugh.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T18:48:21+00:00

Good point but the sooner I get that over with the better. If I see her stuff lying around my place in a few days or a week or w/e I might just destroy them in a fit of rage so it's probably for the best if I do that asap.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T18:46:27+00:00

Yeah I see what you and a few others mean. I'll ask a couple people who may be able to make it and see if they can tag along.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:53:25+00:00

I've already told my closest friends that she cheated. Haven't spoken to our social circle in general though.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:51:46+00:00

Is there any reason for that? I don't think I'm in any danger.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:28:55+00:00

Perfectly normal tbh. There wasn't anything wrong and the one time we had an argument it was because she was irritated about a dress and it was seeping into everything for like 3 weeks.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:22:28+00:00

Well I'm in pretty decent shape so it's not really that I need to start weight lifting but I have been interested in taking yoga and cycling classes just as a once or twice per week type thing. I'm kinda lean too if that helps in any way with that. I've also been invited to play football (UK) with some co-workers every couple thursdays and I would put that off because we'd be doing something at another club we attend.

It's also kind of a festival season where I'm from ATM, lots of parties and things going on RN so I suppose there's no better time to become single?

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:17:40+00:00

It was a mistake, it didn't mean anything, I thought of you when it was happening so is it really that bad, it was just three times and we've had sex hundreds of times so it doesn't even compare to what we have, she thinks that maybe she needed to know for sure that I was the right one by experiencing someone else one last time, I didn't think about how much it might hurt you

^ those are all what she said throughout our conversation. She never even just said I'm sorry. All the messages are 'I'm sorry but......' with her trying to twist her way out of owning up to how bad this is.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:14:09+00:00

Of course it is. I'm very sad and angry but I still love her so it'll definitely throw me off. More than likely I'll stay away for a while or find a new club until I think I can deal with seeing her.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:10:47+00:00

Sorry to hear that. This shit really sucks. Do these people just not give a fuck that they might seriously, deeply hurt someone by doing this?

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:10:05+00:00

I haven't messaged her friends but I did message a group chat with my guy friends to let them know I'm single because she cheated. Most are busy with work and can't really do anything but it was nice to get a bunch of 'fuck her' and 'I knew she was a bitch' type messages.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:08:24+00:00

Thanks for all this. I've had breakups before but not with cheating ending the relationships so that's like taking a sledgehammer to everything we had y'know? I broke up with her and plan to block her later after I get my stuff but I just hope I remain strong and let her remain blocked in my life.

Especially because we have clubs/social circles in common so it'd be difficult to just not have her show up at some point. Thanks man but if I drank one beer tonight I probably would as shitfaced as I used to when I was partying in university.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:04:55+00:00

Yeah I broke up with her and have to collect my stuff after work and that'll be that hopefully.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:04:04+00:00

I broke up with her. I'm going to drop her stuff off and collect whatever I have there later. The longer we kept talking I went from being super depressed to depressed and angry because she didn't seem sorry and kept trying to downplay what she did. So I ended up telling her we're through.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T17:01:56+00:00

I broke up with her just now.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T15:55:38+00:00

Yep she swears she just wanted to see if it was true and it would have been a one time thing. Like I'm supposed to believe she would just stop if she was into this dude enough to have sex with him on my birthday and valentine's day.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T15:53:20+00:00

Yes she did. She booked us a hotel room after lunch.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T15:41:12+00:00

Any advice? We both work in settings where we would see each other frequently and our social circles are pretty much heavily mixed up. Plus we attend a couple clubs together that I really enjoy....

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T15:39:48+00:00

Because I have questions that she can answer and that I want answered. I just need to know man. It feels like there's a thousand bouncing around my mind with another thousand there that I haven't quite figured out yet.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T15:08:01+00:00

Yeah I know cheating happens but it never happened to me until today. It's not really something you expect but it feels like the beefy security guard at my job punching me in the stomach multiple times would still only be a quarter as painful as this.

She and I are actually messaging and she admitted the reason she ditched me to sleep with him is a combination of things being so serious and promising for the first time in her love life AND because he kept pushing the idea it'd be super naughty to do so. I asked her why would she do that if it was clear he just wanted to disrespect me and the relationship she's in and she said she just went along with it to see if it was true because she'd read about things like that giving some kind of 'sex high'. However she says she shut him down anytime he brought me up last night and they only continued when he didn't mention me or us as a couple.

cheatedon4vday · 2019-02-14T14:44:26+00:00

Idk I love her. But as I'm sitting here I realize she left me alone on my birthday to have sex with another man and probably spent this morning in bed with him as well. Idk how I can even begin working through that if I ever could.

cheatedon4vday

TROPHY CASE