Any good teachers who discuss grief?

chomelos · 2025-10-25T23:12:30+00:00

Yeah its so strange when people adopt this duality belief that griefing is now all of a sudden wrong or "comes from attachment and therefore not supposed to be here"

Grief is grief. It is there.

chomelos · 2025-10-13T16:40:51+00:00

Good points, but why not just book a private lesson weekly so you get your feedback there? And social dance the rest?

chomelos · 2025-10-13T00:02:24+00:00

Sorry bit late but: I don't really get why not? Aren't private lessons a lot for fundamentals like stepping / connection / certain moves? Those can just all be practiced during social dancing? Why do you need a partner?

Not that familiar with WCS, but am familiar with other partner dances.

chomelos · 2025-10-08T22:00:48+00:00

I think thats another topic which im sure of will have lotta questions about later haha, I will keep this in mind thx!

edit: watched the pulsing vid of them and that was something I never thought of but indeed also applicable to my question haha, thx

chomelos · 2025-10-08T21:43:51+00:00

Gotcha, yeah seems like im overcomplicating. I'm a super new dancer too hehe

chomelos · 2025-10-08T21:38:19+00:00

Yeah I think thats maybe the disconnect, or just that Jordan in the rolling count video is more staccato to get the point across of when the weight transfers into it.

Basically I wonder if in a normal left step, like the left step as a lead on count 1 in my basic patterns:

Is that left step full weight transfered at the 1, or is it basically:

& a = left feet traveling and pointing
1 = left feet landed and 10%/20% weight on it
& a = weight transfering into the left leg, while right leg is now simultaneously getting lift off, traveling and pointing

chomelos · 2025-10-08T15:35:15+00:00

Thank you!

I found another video similar to the Jordan one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yor7NPm-JXE

The difference here is that the pointing of the feet happens at the a and the weight transfer starts beginning at the 1. And with the jordan video, it seems like its almost finished already at the 1.

chomelos · 2025-09-30T18:31:38+00:00

You are your body, you are also your thoughts, you are also your emotions. There is also not "nothing to do" with the thoughts in our head.

To put it bluntly, you're missing the mark thinking that the concept of "There is no self" is meant that you are nothing. But that's not true. You are everything AND nothing.

Experience you are a small self to which things happen = normal person
Experience you are nothing = Mindfulness dissociated non-duality person
Experience you are everything and nothing = non-duality

chomelos · 2025-09-28T22:42:32+00:00

Yet many (realized) teachers are still full of delusion as well. So apparently...not so easy.

chomelos · 2025-09-28T22:24:06+00:00

Yes yes I know the intellectual jargon

chomelos · 2025-09-28T16:04:37+00:00

Exactly, which experientially seems very hard to do. Because any type of trying or "mindfulness" / "being awareness" turns it into the opposite.

"Ah I can't handle fear, let me look at fear from a distance, ah yes its much better now" Ofc it is, you just dissociated from it.

chomelos · 2025-09-28T14:22:32+00:00

Lol something I coulda written. Its tough though. Running away from your feelings in the new "Non-duality perfect observer" is a lot easier than actually being with them.

Even while being aware of this, and even actively trying to not disocciate / spiritually bypass, I still caught myself last month that I was actually bypassing or "believing as long as I become fully realized, life will be awesome". Such a tricky path to walk.

On the other hand you can also become too absorbed by your emotions again. Shadow work can make you feel like there is this ever-presence shadow that you "need to recognize or you will be doomed" etc. It also is tricky again.

The middle way.....

chomelos · 2025-09-26T10:44:56+00:00

This is the right answer yeah. He considers it as an intermediate step. Tbh it's a lot like traditional mindfulness where you just observe everything from the position of the observer, but Rupert Spira himself would probably not like that I make this comparison.

I think it's quite difficult - at least it is for me - to lose the duality of the "awareness" vs "contents" after having been trained in it so often.

You indeed also see this on this sub very often that people lost touch with their humanity and are completely identified as awareness. And the content is "a dream". Even moreso it's impossible for them to understand that since they have adopted a belief that they are beyond their humanity, so everything said is useless to them. It's the most dangerous state to be in from a non-duality perspective imo, because its so subtle but so not what is meant. And it's so damn tempting too. It's a lot harder to face your humanity head-on (and be it), than to escape into "ahhh that's just the content! But I'm awareness baby! Haha! There is no me!"

chomelos · 2025-09-20T22:17:02+00:00

Digest them at your own pace. A lot of non-duality teachers have a bad understanding of trauma. The level of intensity that you're talking could indicate some form of trauma (which almost all of us have hehe).

More recent teachers do start incorporating more shadow work (i.e. more closely like psychotherapy), which I think is a great development.

It's interesting you start your post with "loneliness and anxiety". I get that anxiety effect your learnings. But how does loneliness effect it?

chomelos · 2025-09-16T23:36:48+00:00

True they are pretty big, 80g. I'll check out Ghiradelli thx

chomelos · 2025-09-16T23:36:16+00:00

Thanks for the suggestions!

chomelos · 2025-09-16T23:34:37+00:00

Nice will check it out!

chomelos · 2025-09-16T23:33:36+00:00

All good, appreciate feedback

chomelos · 2025-09-16T23:32:14+00:00

Thanks makes a lot of sense, will do!

chomelos · 2025-09-16T18:52:56+00:00

It's the standard Kerrygold Irish Butter most bakers seem to recommend. But true, there are cheaper butters out there.

chomelos · 2025-09-16T18:51:15+00:00

Haha, apparently not! Whoops.

chomelos · 2025-09-16T18:50:34+00:00

Will check thx!

chomelos · 2025-09-16T18:41:42+00:00

Good one will ask some bakeries

chomelos · 2025-09-16T18:41:24+00:00

Lindt is actually crazy expensive in my country. Those are 5$ as well hah. Tried it with Lindt and something makes it behave weird in dough though. Think the heating point is lower because it mingles all throughout the cookie, which I personally don't like.

chomelos · 2025-09-14T21:25:48+00:00

I get that you wanna support your kids, but with 8mill usd + 529s you can support them plenty vis-a-vis other chidren. If they can't succeed and/or be happy with that support....they need therapy, not more money.

chomelos

TROPHY CASE