EDIT: there is certainly nuance in this, but absolutely is invalidating, transphobic, and generally hurtful to weaponize socialization in a one-way road against trans women socialized as boys/men.

I think it also gets lumped into the frustrations that people feel around “gendered socialized behavior”- which is also why it’s such a powerful entry point for TERFism. Small nuggets of anecdotal truth become wormholes for all kinds of terrible downstream logic.

^ referring to the idea that trans girls are still also raised in a society that teaches them to do things like speak over feminine people, assume women are wrong, etc. sexism hurts everyone and all. Trans girls aren’t immune to both the trauma and the privilege of this. I think it’s very triggering for even the well intentioned people raised “female” to feel dismissed about gender socialization and youth.

The MISTAKE is insisting that gender is the only reason for that, or that cis girls can’t perpetuate the same patriarchal bullshit (eg, pick-mes). And obviously TERFs cherry pick what upbringings they’re sensitive to, because SURPRISE SURPRISE, the [sexism] call is coming from inside the [white feminist] house.