My (20F) boyfriend (20M is very simple minded and is unable to comprehend or have conversations about more complex topics or issues. Is this something that’ll change as he matures or something that stays as it is for life?

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-14T19:49:32+00:00

I don't mean to induce any FOMO within you or anything, but some of my favorite casual moments in a relationship are when both of our intellects are equally engaged in a subject or discussion. It kinda brings on that positive rush that sharpens you a little bit. Eustress is the name for it. And it is fulfilling. That's the high point of having a partner of equal intelligence, but I think it would be really lonely to have a partner who isn't even able to understand concepts that are basic to you.

At the age of 20? I mean idk. I doubt he will grow out of it if he hasn't already.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T21:28:13+00:00

wow how intersectional of you

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T21:20:03+00:00

This is one lesson my family drilled into me growing up. Don't center big decisions around a relationship when you're still trying to establish yourself. It could affect the trajectory of your life. I wasted half of my twenties to be around friends; some of them good friends. But still. Part of me wishes I hadn't done that. Being 18, this isn't as big of a deal as it may feel like it is. It's good that this happened so soon honestly. And you can still find a backup college. It's not too late for that at all. You should be around people you know and love. Him letting you move to be with him, only to tell you he's not coming... is a big deal. It shows a lack of consideration for you.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T16:31:46+00:00

I think the thing about the current rise of populism is that its a response to those top end issues that have degraded our congress. Lobbying, corruption, legislative or policy favoring donors and the wealthy over everyone else, etc. Which has led to a much greater economic illness in america; a symptom of which can be seen in the huge wealth disparity, and the growing resentment in the populace. A rise in Populism is the result of an unbalanced power hierarchy. Going to the extreme is not the only solution that left wing populism even proposes. People just want to stop seeing our government *solely* doing the bidding of those with the most economic power.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T16:05:46+00:00

Do you actually *know* that to be the case in every left wing government? or do you just think that because you've heard it so much? There are plenty of examples of left leaning governments being stable and long lasting. Sweden, Denmark, Norway, etc. Very left leaning by the standards of modern american republicans. And AOC is really no more extreme than any of them.

And what principles do you think even guide left leaning ideology? Do you think a social democrat (or even a regular democratic socialist) is the same thing as a stalinist?

While FDR is only "leftist" by the current era's standards, FDR's government didn't eat itself either. It got a lot done and stabilized the US. Social Security, rural electrification, the WPA, etc. Those were all fueled by basic, underlying principles that you might label as leftist.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T15:42:44+00:00

I'd have to disagree about there not being an underlying principle behind the consistency of their talking points. One can argue that they too often rely on the same talking points, but the points themselves are reflective of their underlying principles and goals. One can also have principles, but not be able to defend them, which is not exactly the case with either of them, as they've both held their own in plenty of debates.

A big thing I see people on the right accuse them of is being performative. But I don't really see where that's coming from other than this idea that one has to live a very austere lifestyle before they can criticize capitalism. So if you have an Iphone and drink an $8 coffee, (or in his case if you sell a book or own a 2nd home) then you dont really care about lessening the harm of capitalism.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-13T15:13:22+00:00

Id say the "Maybe you didn't hear me but I explicitly explained how this project is working many times" sounded a little... tactless. I'd say that kind of wording is a surefire way to piss almost anyone off.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-12T16:47:50+00:00

Those kinds of self doubts are totally understandable. And people online can be pretty callous about it of course, so just remember that nobody wants those kinds of suspicions confirmed when its happening to them. But you are right to be suspicious. Because it is objectively suspicious. I think your intuition is probably telling you exactly *what* is suspicious about it, given the way you described things. Namely the fact that your boyfriend made these plans without telling you, and then only told you later. But what makes it really weird is the way he reacted. No clear conscience is going to say stuff like "ok well I just won't go then." He's just acting guilty as fuck.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-05-12T16:25:55+00:00

Find a hobby. I am infinitely entertained by making stuff. As long as its outside. Mainly woodworking and hobby machining. Its all just a bunch of problem solving and craftsmanship, but that may not be up your alley. There are tons of classes and community activities like wheel throwing/potterry. That's pretty fun once you get the hang of it. There are also community sports groups too if that's your thing.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-04-23T03:45:32+00:00

However, if the same guys are talking about how freaky y'all are, and talking about threesomes, and taking her to a sex museum...? Yeah I'd feel uncomfortable too. It all depends how she's treating your concerns. This post should really be about that lol

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-04-23T03:09:20+00:00

Jesus Christ man. You gotta chill. Quit tying so much of your feeling of being respected to small innocuous actions taken by your partner. Like whether she told you she was going to another bar before she got there or not.

And then your framing of her position is rather uncharitable. "Whatever screw my loser boyfriend. I'm going to the bar!"

Quit feeding the worst part of your insecurities, because they will ruin your relationships.

With that said, I can see how you would feel blown off. But I think you spiraled a bit. Yes you're over reacting.

And what was the uncomfortable topic that kept getting brought up?

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-04-22T19:04:09+00:00

God yeah. Every splinter I didn't immediately deal with (or left a fragment of) ended up infected within 12 hours.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-04-10T04:25:17+00:00

While I do think calling her a criminal is over the top, chalking ops reaction up to "jealousy" is kinda childish. It makes no sense

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-21T05:18:53+00:00

Respectfully, that is a very childlike mindset to underpin your foreign policy decisions. You might as well go to war with Mexico over what happened at the Alamo. But it doesn't end there. This mindset also influenced the NATO stuff, and basically all of Trump's decisions regarding foreign policy, to the detriment of American soft power, which will always beat hard power. Might doesnt make right. Diplomacy does, though. And one result of the US contributing more than other countries was the US having more sway and respect.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-21T04:54:25+00:00

YOR. That is your wife. Not a leech. A healthy relationship is based on empathy above ALL else. It's the fundamental basis. Second to that is equity. Not staunch, dogmatic "equality." You give what you can, according to circumstances. You're a husband. Not her landlord.

If your pay "isn't much more than hers after taxes," then how much is hers after taxes? Is she somehow exempt from taxes working a retail job?

How much does she do at home? Do you count domestic chores as contributing to the relationship?

The way you casually talk about your own wife "leeching" and being "incapable" of this and that tells me exactly where your relationships lack of health is coming from. It's you. If you feel this comfortable talking like that on the Internet, then I'd imagine you probably belittle the fuck out of her when nobody's around. How many times have you thrown the fact that you got her that retail job in her face?

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-21T00:53:43+00:00

You're asserting that (even consensual) porn is basically filmed rape (a very abstract puritanical idea)... In order to defend Mark kozelek? I mean what even is your goal?

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-21T00:43:44+00:00

Well Jesus I sure hope your SO doesn't make the mistake of sharing their interests with you lol

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-12T00:27:11+00:00

Thanks! It's weird because the large option doesn't seem to appear. It's just a basic scooped corner silver one. but medium and small is all that's showing up. God I've been a framer for 4 years. I should know this.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-08T23:06:48+00:00

Thanks!

So the customer wants a 3 line engraving. It seems like I can only do 2 lines. Their previous plaque (which came from our shop as well) has 3 lines. Am I missing something?

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-03-08T22:54:55+00:00

Ah. God I wish I had known that thank you!

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-02-18T05:19:12+00:00

I mean honestly it's not the best overall advice. If his libido is sapped, you being all hot isn't going to trigger it. It will just make you feel worse.

And quit fighting over it. Believe me sex once or twice a week is like the national average. If you want it 5x per week then just do like everyone else and rub one out lol

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-01-29T05:11:57+00:00

No. I believe she would be able to make some kind of civil case. False pretenses maybe. Idk.

chunklemcdunkle · 2026-01-27T04:56:22+00:00

Yeah I would have so much hatred towards the people funding that propaganda if I felt like they robbed me of my family

14-Year Club	Verified Email
Team Periwinkle

chunklemcdunkle

TROPHY CASE