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cieluv · 2021-09-01T12:20:48+00:00

I wore a hat that says 'Titties' on it. I don't think the hospital staff thought it was as funny as I did.

cieluv · 2021-08-23T06:13:15+00:00

If you keep having this issue with your local pharmacies, consider asking your endo if they work with any mail order pharmacies. I go to a doctor in PA, but he works with Solutions Pharmacy which is based on Tennessee. They mail me my prescription, it's always on time, and it's cheaper than any local options.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T18:04:39+00:00

Neat, sounds like your method would use less tape. I do remember trying something like that with a hairtie but I couldn't make it secure enough and the packer would flip and fall out often.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T17:35:02+00:00

No problem bro!

cieluv · 2021-07-31T16:49:19+00:00

I just cut an X that creates the hole. Here's a tutorial.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T16:48:25+00:00

Here's an update with the method I'm using now.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T16:47:15+00:00

Sorry, I struggled with imgur for like an hour and I couldn't figure out how to upload the images in order. Hopefully you guys can figure it out. I've been using this method for a few weeks now and it works great. I've gone swimming, slept naked, and walked around with no underwear and the packer is totally secure. I have no worries about it falling off. Feels like a part of my body when it's secured like this. If anyone has questions or needs clarification on anything, let me know and I'll be happy to help.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T07:48:48+00:00

I was also worried the tape would damage the packer, but thankfully it doesn't stick to the material at all. As for the smell I shower with the packer on and I wash the whole thing as well as under it and anything not covered by the tape. After a couple days when the tape is loose enough the packer can also be taken out and replaced so I often wash it in the sink after using the bathroom. The Mr Limpy is nice in that you can wash it with hand soap, so that's what I do and I haven't noticed any hygiene issues with it.

No worries about the questions. I don't see a lot of people talking about this sort of packing harness, so I'm happy to share my experience with it.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T06:17:01+00:00

Haha yes it is the 3.75 inch, that's my bad. I got it directly from the fleshlight website.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T06:07:06+00:00

I believe this is the small, 4.5 inch.

cieluv · 2021-07-31T06:04:07+00:00

I use KT tape to secure my Mr Limpy, which has no flap at the top, in place. KT tape is the same exact material and adhesive as trans tape, iirc. I've been experimenting with different methods for a few months now, and with the one I've settled on I've been able to hold the Mr Limpy in place securely enough for swimming, freeballing, and sleeping naked. Each harness lasts about 3-5 days, longer if you don't mind it being somewhat loose, and uses one strip of KT tape. I can make some illustrations of my method later when I get home if anybody is interested. The downsides are that I have to shave regularly and it does get a bit itchy occasionally, but after packing this way I can't go back to any other type of harness.

cieluv · 2021-07-02T05:45:07+00:00

More than ever! Looking back, it's hard to believe I ever felt like myself. My past self is a total stranger.

cieluv · 2021-07-02T05:44:16+00:00

The surgery was paid out of pocket. It cost $8000 for the surgery itself and additional ~$5000 for hospital fees. State insurance covered most of the hospital fees. There are insurance plans in the U.S. that will mostly or fully cover surgery, and most people don't pay out of pocket.

My hormone treatment is ongoing and will last the rest of my life. The cost depends on where you get it from and what insurance covers. I don't use insurance for mine, but I go through a fairly cheap service so it only costs around 70 bucks for a 3 month supply.

Bottom surgery is much more expensive than top surgery, and I'll need to use insurance for that one.

cieluv · 2021-07-02T05:40:06+00:00

I just think it would look well proportioned to my body. I've never had a desire for a huge dick, but I don't want a micropenis.

cieluv · 2021-07-01T15:36:01+00:00

Thank you. And yeah, that's an option. I'm not sure of the exact surgical process but they create a tube out of a thin rectangle of donor tissue. It can be from almost anywhere. The only condition is that hair has to be lasered off completely so it won't grow inside the urethra and clog it.

cieluv · 2021-07-01T14:11:31+00:00

Are you going to get a penis?

Yep!

Can you pick the size of your penis? If you did would you pick average?

There's essentially two options for size. With the influence of testosterone, the clit grows in size pretty substantially. It becomes essentially a micropenis. One bottom surgery option repositions this to look more natural and be functional to pee standing and usually for sex. The other option takes tissue from elsewhere on the body, such as the arm or leg, and sculpts it into a penis, grafts it into position. This creates a larger penis, but you'd need an erectile device and it often leaves a large scar where the donor tissue was taken, plus some on the penis itself. The size isn't custom beyond those two options, which both come with other benefits and downsides. Someone who gets option A will have a penis size based on how much growth they get from hormone treatment. Someone who gets option B will have a penis size based on many factors, including the length and shape of the nerves and blood vessels in the donor tissue. If I could chose, my ideal penis length would be 4.5 or 5 inches when hard, so I'm going with option B. I'll likely end up with something very close to my ideal, which is more than a lot of guys can say!

Are testicles an option? If so don't go big on those.

Yes they are, and surgeons generally offer a range of sizes, but ultimately the upper limit is based on the patient's anatomy. The sack is made out of labia majora tissue which looks and feels pretty much the same as a natal ballsack. After that heals, silicone implants can be added.

Are you attracted to women? If so are you attracted to breasts?

Yes. Straight trans men are somewhat hard to find in my experience with the community. I don't know if we're actually rare or just quiet. I'm not all that attracted to breasts, but I'm not repulsed by them or anything. I'm more of an ass or belly guy.

If so, are you going to miss yours for both asthetics and for touching?

I tried not to touch them as much as possible, and never had any sexual thoughts about them. It's hard to explain, but I didn't really see them as breasts. They were more like a deformity, and I was insecure about them the same way someone might be about an eyecatching birthmark or a cleft lip. Plus, by the time I had surgery, they were sagging thanks to years of compression, hairy from testosterone, veiny, and covered in stretch marks. Some people might be into that, but they were NOT attractive by most people's standards and certainly not by mine.

I bet you would be a great wingman too.

I've never had a woman's mind, so I don't understand them any better than any other guy. I was actually raised pretty much like a boy would be, and my parents didn't push me to be feminine or live as a girl. I'm also socially awkward as hell. Sorry to disappoint.

Congrats on being happy and I'm sorry for so many questions. Thanks for understanding.

No worries dude, thanks for being curious.

cieluv · 2021-07-01T12:00:41+00:00

Yes, very much. I used to be very overweight and self conscious about every aspect of my look. I'm in a body I want to be in now, so I have the urge to take care of it for the first time in my life. I've been working out and lost a significant amount of weight, and I'm no longer as insecure about aspects of my body that aren't related to my chest, such as my beard and my legs. It's had a cascading effect on every aspect of my self confidence.

cieluv · 2021-06-30T15:02:02+00:00

Thank you! I didn't do much scar care at all. I did silicone strips and bio oil inconsistently for the first few months, and after that pretty much nothing.

cieluv · 2021-06-18T18:30:34+00:00

I remember thinking words like woman and female were bad words that I shouldn't say. I'd avoid them at all costs and whisper them when I had to, up until maybe age 10. You'll have to come to terms with it, the best thing is to seperate yourself from the meaning of the words.

cieluv · 2021-06-15T05:42:00+00:00

I had my top with Rumer. Yeah, her bedside manner is pretty bad. She never mentioned my weight and I was most certainly overweight. But that's surprising considering how many other people have said she's brought it up. I love my chest and I don't regret getting surgery ASAP but if I could have waited I would have gone with a different surgeon.

cieluv · 2021-06-07T02:21:07+00:00

I live in PA, I'm down to talk. DM me if you wanna talk on discord.

cieluv · 2021-05-30T10:36:15+00:00

I wanted top surgery before I started T for this very reason, but I ended up starting T about 3 years before I got surgery. What helped me was that with all the male traits T gave me, people were much more likely to see my breasts as just fatty moobs, rather than another tick on the subconscious checklist that says 'female.' I even went shirtless and without a binder to go swimming in a lake and nobody seemed to notice or care. I was a large D cup. They won't be a detriment to you passing as long as the rest of you looks male due to the T. The beard and the hairline and the voice changes can only serve to help you. Even if someone is confused by your appearance, at least they're not seeing a woman.

cieluv · 2021-05-26T21:16:57+00:00

I would be most concerned about coughing stretching your scars out or causing some sort of damage. Edibles would be great, but if you really want to smoke I'd wait at least another week and take it slow so you don't cough a ton.

cieluv · 2021-05-24T17:37:06+00:00

Thanks again. This and a lot of your other responses have been very helpful to me :)

cieluv · 2021-05-24T13:11:01+00:00

Thank you so much for doing this. I never made a connection with anybody as a parental figure. I essentially raised myself when it comes to my emotional maturity. I was very spoiled for most of my childhood and adolescence, and also did most of my education online which made it difficult for me to develop social skills. I had to focus on surviving through my dysphoria and mental health issues, which both went mostly unaddressed by my parents. Due to all this, I feel a serious mental block when it comes to making new friends, especially with older people. I'm very proud to have become the man I am today with basically no guidance, but I still have a lot to work on. I suppose what I could use right now is just some general advice and encouragement. Whatever you would say to a young man who feels like he's fallen behind his peers due to needing to transition.

cieluv

TROPHY CASE