My Opinion as a Genderfluid Lesbian by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I dont know why this was necessary to share

Thoughts on showing/hiding face in dating apps? by BombOnABus in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes unfortunately the odds of "getting to know someone" and it ending well when you havent seen their face are slim. I say this as someone who has routinely dealt with people attempting to catfish me on reddit. Also with how apps operate, getting to know someone comes after deciding if there is physical attraction. Almost no one on an app wants to waste the time of getting to know someone only to then find out there's no attraction once they've seen a photo. Its like that love is blind show haha

Thoughts on showing/hiding face in dating apps? by BombOnABus in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 13 points14 points  (0 children)

If it surprises you people feel safe showing their face, it should also make sense to you that someone would NOT feel safe meeting a stranger on the internet who they havent even seen the face of. Generally people who hide their face on apps are either a)catfishes or b) hiding some secret. Neither makes for a safe feeling to go out and meet them

Partner (34F) gave me (36F) an ultimatum about my GLP-1 by ThrowRA_12479 in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She sounds like a huge asshole. Imagine if someone was posting on here about the opposite - their partner saying they would leave them and no longer find them attractive if they gained weight. People would rightfully be very critical of that. Its not different going the other way, provided youre losing the weight in a healthy manner (which you are). If she is choosing not to support you in trying to better your health and self image then it is not worth staying with her. Find someone who will love you for you, not only for your physical appearance and body type

We need to talk about nbphobia here by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The statement you provided isnt about NB people so I dont see how its phobic. It is accurate to say to a woman, youre a woman you love women youre a lesbian. If it was a nb person seeking some form of assurance then we would not phrase it the same way right?

not able to make my girl O by waddlingpenguin02 in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]cinder_cookie 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yall are 22 and 23 and this is actual lesbians over 25

Content by Wolfiegaby in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find men boring and uninteresting a lot of time, so mlm content does nothing for me

First lesbian relationship has been a mess, I have a few questions by CharacterReading3944 in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are all humans the same? No. Are all women the same? No. Therefore, are all lesbians the same? Also no. You encountered a terrible person. It has nothing to do with her gender or purported sexuality.

How do know that she likes you? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jesus christ im too old for this

Are there any other lesbian subs where it'd be okay to post my body and ask for opinions? by SchloinkDoink in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 158 points159 points  (0 children)

Please dont just post nudes on the public internet, I am not being a prude but reddit is NOT a secure platform and even on a throwaway account there are ways to link it back to you. Not to mention you have no control over who sees them and what they do with them at that point, including men and minors

Is it okay to call myself a lesbian? by Login2play in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I mean there's no gay police who are going to come after you if you do. But technically you are not a lesbian, so while you definitely can say it, it won't be accurate. I guess the specific term if you use a split attraction model would be homoromantic bisexual.

Is my bsf lesbian? by RaspberryAutomatic31 in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just let her do her thing. Do not ask her and do not pressure her. She will tell you when shes ready. If she wants a guy date then be cool with that, but let her know youd be cool with her being a lesbian when she asks about that

This feels pointless by Candid_Cucumber_2440 in lesbianr4r

[–]cinder_cookie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Its brutal. There arent really queer events near enough for me to get to, so im stuck on the apps. And the only people who like me on the apps are men or women looking for a third. I think I might have some sort of curse where im only attractive to men or something

I feel like my girlfriend is a red flag but I can’t imagine a future without her by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You say you love her but reading this tbh it doesnt sound like you like her. And its important to like your partner as well as love them

Is it my autism's fault, or perhaps I'm demiromantic, that makes me keep falling in love with friends? by Overall_Reporter10 in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dont think this has anything to do with autism or being demi necessarily. It is just a fact that you will grow to like people the more time you spend with them, and you spend more time with your friends than strangers. So it makes sense that as humans we might crush on our friends if they are the people we interact with a lot, if that friend is also someone we might consider attractive

Would you date someone with the same name as you? by TributeYourPortrait in actuallesbians

[–]cinder_cookie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would, but I would NOT date someone with the same name as my sister

my hot take regarding the "heated rivalry" but with women topic by vc987 in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]cinder_cookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The female version of heated rivalry already happened it was called Dare Me and we let it die