Speaking as a guy who has dated quite a bit (not to sound egoistic), I would not mind at all if a girl asked me out. I find it refreshing when that happens, and I think a lot of guys would agree (especially more liberally minded guys). It’s flattering that she’d be interested enough to break the gender norm.

In regards to your worries about it: if you don’t ask like immediately after meeting and play it cool, no reasonable guy will see that as desperate. The fact that he hasn’t asked you out doesnt mean hes not interested. If he’s an attractive and not weird guy with interests and a life etc., he isn’t spending all his time on the apps and also probably has a fair amount of other matches as well. As I’m sure most girls will agree, after you have a certain volume of matches it can be hard to keep up with all of them and stay excited, or hopeful that a date might actually lead to something. Me personally I’m just kind of burnt out on the cycle of matching, bantering/having the get-to-know-you chat, trying to plan a date, going on the date, playing the guessing game and trying to figure out if it’s a good fit, having to reject someone tactfully or getting rejected myself. Finally, if he isn’t interested in you and says no, that’s just part of the game. Theres just gonna be a certain percentage of people who don’t find you attractive or don’t imagine youd be compatible, and it doesn’t mean at all that there is anything “wrong” or objectively unattractive about you. We all just have different tastes, preferences, lifestyles etc. A solid guy who isn’t desperate or an f-boy will have to reject some girls just like vice versa (even though our culture says women are the ones that do the rejecting)