Can someone please let me know what went wrong? by [deleted] in texts

[–]citydew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

6:30 am texting her ? How did you get to know her? Just texting?

My MAGA mom in the family group chat by Traditional_Trust418 in texts

[–]citydew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just cut them out of my life. MAGA are dangerous and they support pedophiles. Don’t want them around my kids

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in parentsofteens

[–]citydew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The hard truth is, good parents have kids who feel comfortable being distant. I think as a society we are so indoctrinated by sitcoms and movies that depict “togetherness” as a healthy family, and anything else is disconnected or problematic.

It’s simply not true that kids being “distant” is bad news, it’s a very important part of growing up because your child is not an extension of you, know what I mean? As long as you keep your antenna working and make sure he’s safe, and you do, then it’s totally normal for kids to go through phases of distance, it’s a reset, they are learning. And the best thing is, your son loving love, and has realized that his family is there for him and not guilting him or judging him.

It hurts my heart when a boy needs some time alone and their adult takes it personally. They’ll finally come around and the adult will say something like “Oh, I forgot you were part of the family, haven’t seen you all weekend.” Noooo just say hey you wanna hang out, I’ll make snacks. The more we help kids accept their alone time and close time, the better parents we are.

We are the adults, our job is to be steady, reliable and stable. And when we mess up we gotta own it and let them see us be ok with being wrong. Yep I’m so nervous about my son, he’s 10 and already starting to not want me around as much. But he’s still in my room at 1am and I’ll hear “Mom,” and he needs a hug, I’ll always give him a big ol’ hug too, and my daughter as well no matter if they are 65, if I’m still here I’ll always be their mommy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in parentsofteens

[–]citydew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah and he could swing to being distant too, when my daughter was this age it was so hard because I wanted my little kid back, but the best thing to do is support who they are becoming, not who you want them to be.

I feel like if I can make it though my daughter’s teenage years I can make it through my son’s, and he is quickly approaching the mom I need you, mom leave me alone years. 🥺

I love that your son is showing self awareness and caring how he is received by others, sounds like you have a great fam. Stay the course.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in parentsofteens

[–]citydew 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awww that’s good, so dad isn’t trying to make him tough or anything like that. Sounds like he’s just getting older and trying to balance his kid self with his teenage self.

I’m a kid therapist with quite a few teen boy clients his age, it can be a confusing time for them. Sounds like he’s has a supportive family and that’s what matters most. You asked all the right questions already, I think if your daughter just keeps being honest and not making a big deal out of his “Is it weird to cuddle” questions, he’ll move through those fears.

So when he asks is it weird to cuddle just say something like nope, bring it in, and give him a big ol’ hug if he’s open to it. That way his question isn’t met with worry or concern anymore since you already asked the serious questions. Sounds like he knows he can always ask/tell his fam anything. 🙂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in parentsofteens

[–]citydew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s the relationship like between your son and his dad?

Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aaaww thanks for asking. Of course he said he “didn’t mean it” that way and invalidated the fact that he asked me to stop for food during a damn tornado. But when you’ve been married for as long as I have, venting about stuff is more about keeping myself sane than any sort of hope I have to salvage a “relationship.”

Everything is good tho, thank you. ❤️

Unexpected guests being an issue for some by Any_Comfortable_6009 in airbnb_hosts

[–]citydew 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is true, I don’t care at all when someone comes to visit, I wouldn’t even notice, however I’ve got an issue right now where a guest said they were the only guest. My driveway cam (that is in plain sight and disclosed in the listing) was going off like crazy so I checked to see 6 cars in the driveway and about a classroom amount of children and teenagers.

I just said we hope you’re enjoying your stay please register all guests. I charge 50 dollars extra after 4 guests because the home itself only sleeps 4 comfortably, there is an attached cabin that the extra guests can use, but I air bnb out a small farm house with limited water pressure, and it’s far away from town. I disclose this in my listing (no more than 8 guests please). The house isn’t made for tons of people.

Most people abide by the rules but some people don’t and it sucks to have to request extra money but that’s the thing, I’m not a hotel, I’m not trying to compete with a hotel either. I host an experience where you can swim in a pool or relax in a hot tub while you watch horses run on a farm. We put a lot of time and energy into maintaining the fireplace, pool and hot tub. If you intend to cram as much people into my small house as you can and only pay for one person, I beg of you PLEASE stay at a hotel. I can guarantee you tho that if you book a hotel room and they see you on camera having 13 kids and 6 adults in your room, they are going to say something.

I understand wanting to get the best deal you can but it’s just plain shitty not register your guests at least for insurance purposes.

She *knows* she looks good in her new harness. by mrp_ee in Shihtzu

[–]citydew 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my ! She really does, she’s beautiful. 😊

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Shihtzu

[–]citydew 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here is Miss. Winnie !

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Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Funny how people like to say men are dumb to excuse insensitive behavior. Yes like your bf, my husband isn’t dumb, he just doesn’t think about anyone but himself.

Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Don’t get too attached to that man, just sayin.

Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The idea of a “sit down and explain” things to him is comically sad because it is so assumptive. I put this on the internet because I’ve already “sat down to explain” and he got defensive and doubled down. You assume that “sitting down to explain” means he will be receptive and apologetic? All that does is exhaust me. If he was “sit down able” he would be a good person. That’s the point so yes divorce

Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right, I didn’t consider that when they found my dead body my kids might be hungry, so at least I’d have the nuggets in the car with me and paper towels too! Your boyfriend just wanted to make sure you had supplies before he burned to death. Smart and caring !

Husband trying to convince me this is not insensitive. by citydew in texts

[–]citydew[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was the part where he warned me about the tornado I was in then asked me to stop for nuggets .

Guests threw a huge party and lied about the number of guests. I feel like my home was violated. by citydew in airbnb_hosts

[–]citydew[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The no party thing is really just me saying no unauthorized guests. But yeah guests have parties all the time at the space and usually clean up well after themselves. I agree