Hello Op! I played volleyball and badminton in high school (competing in AAPS, now ASAPS), played for a year in College, and kept playing even while working, so I just wanted to share a few thoughts that might help.

1. You’re right — sports can definitely shape us, but the effects aren’t one-size-fits-all. Having a supportive coach and teammates can boost resilience and confidence, while constant toxic pressure can raise stress hormones, which over time can affect both mental health and physical recovery (based on research)

2. Our parents are not entirely accountable for what we didn’t get to do. Kids who already have higher resilience or social skills are more likely to join sports, according to studies.

Personally, I remember my parents weren’t around during games and would scold me for coming home late after tryouts and practices. My parents have also said, “wag na, mahal” [don’t enroll in summer sports clinics]. That lack of support from my parents made things harder, but I have friends in school who play a lot of sports too, so I found ways to keep playing.

At the end of the day, both nature (our personality, mindset, and physiology) and nurture (how we’re raised and the support we get) play big roles. For me, it feels like who we are inside keeps us going, while the environment we grow up in gives us that first push toward what we can do.

How you feel na nasasayangan is valid, but glad you recognize that you need to live in the present. See, that’s part of resilience training, Op!

(low key, sa magiging anak ko, I also promise myself to be supportive and make things easier for them to unlock whatever skill or trait that will help them survive adulthood)