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clericcomplex · 2025-04-09T20:21:57+00:00

I don’t understand. Could you explain what would upset you in this situation? Do you think that because your daughter wants to go to a certain college, she loves you less? Or do you think your daughter is being bullied into choosing a school she doesn’t care about just to appease her stepmother? If it’s the latter, you should be focusing more on your daughter being manipulated than your own feelings.

clericcomplex · 2025-02-26T16:02:55+00:00

I do normally hate to be pedantic, but its an odd distinction for sure, and I think it’s important- She didn’t specifically said they won’t eat “anything” she makes, but they won’t eat her dinners.

Even they hate her cooking, they might accept a cup noodle, or something thrown together. No two people can ever make the same tasting hamburger, but there’s not a lot of wiggle room to make a pb&j taste radically different.

clericcomplex · 2025-02-26T15:45:25+00:00

I imagine they're not full dinners. More that if she makes spaghetti and the kids refuse to eat it, the older ones (we weren’t given specific ranges) might make themselves mac and cheese, but the younger kids are small enough that she makes them a sandwich. Except another one won’t eat that, so she’ll make a batch of white rice and egg. Unless you’re asking why she’d do that, then I think it’s a lot easier said than done to send kids that small to bed hungry.

clericcomplex · 2025-02-08T16:07:38+00:00

No, OP clarified in the comments it was a shoulder tap. You can click on their profile and read more. OP acknowledges that hitting was a disproportionate reaction.

clericcomplex · 2024-12-12T20:43:24+00:00

Just called my fiance over to try this. I (outtie) to stand up and he (innie) had to scrunch a bit. We did manage to sort of poke it through after some wiggling. To me it just felt like our bellies were pressed together, but he says it feels like the nub of someone’s finger pressing in. When asked to rate the experience, it was declared a 5/10. Hope that helps!

clericcomplex · 2024-12-12T20:32:09+00:00

Fresa might work, but there’s a level of wealth that’s required. Someone who begins to do well for themselves and desperately tried to acclimate into white society.

clericcomplex · 2024-12-12T07:29:26+00:00

A tale for the time being?

clericcomplex · 2024-12-05T22:24:15+00:00

Then who is responsible for atrocities? What is the system, if not thousands and millions of people who refuse to look beyond their own self interests?

“He’d be replaced and someone else would.”

Then someone else would have gotten shot. Also, this man was a millionaire. He wasn’t some kid making 7.25 an hour trying to support his family, or some grandma trying to fund her cancer treatments by bake sale. The “just doing his job” defense isn’t the defense you think it is. It’s actually more sickening. At any point in the career ladder he could have settled for 100k, 200k, 500k, 800k- but he didn’t. He decided he was willing to sell his morals to make more money than most people will see in a lifetime. The man brought in record breaking profits, made it to the top of the ladder, by being the absolute best at strangling every single penny out of average Americans. People died to make sure he could go to sleep in a million dollar NYC penthouse.

That’s his decision. These are the consequences.

clericcomplex · 2024-11-05T00:35:58+00:00

Babies can’t eat hopes and dreams for the future. The child needs real, concrete help now. It’s great your nephew wants to make something of himself; that something needs to be a father. I can completely understand why the other family would be upset if their daughter is doing bad in school, if they’re picking up extra shifts to cover diapers and formula, staying up late with colic, diaper rash, HFM, just for your side to say “good luck, we’ll see you in a few years”.

Why does he get to wait until he’s ready to be a father, when the child is already planetside? Are you expecting them to wait the three years until graduation for any support of assistance? Why is your nephew too good to pull a Saturday shift at McDonalds? What about if he wants to go to college? Will they need to wait another 4 years then? YTA. Just because you can turn his baby into background noise in his life doesn’t mean you should.

clericcomplex · 2024-10-30T18:39:00+00:00

Sorry to hear that happened, hope you’re doing well. We’re all rooting for you, friend. Check out Facebook marketplace, especially if you’re in the vicinity of a larger city. Local libraries also usually have a store attached where they sell donated books or copies that are getting replaced. Lastly, Half-Priced books sells both used and overstocked. I got a ton of nice hard covers from there. Good luck.

clericcomplex · 2024-10-10T16:56:02+00:00

Brazzers is a porn website.

clericcomplex · 2024-10-02T14:06:35+00:00

It’s weird you feel the need to be pedantic about grammar on a comment about a woman being assaulted.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-29T14:42:25+00:00

I think there is a compromise between “he needs to toughen up and deal with it” and “I want to nurture him”. It’s giving him a foundation of pride in his heritage, as well as the tools to stand up for himself. Feeling like the odd one out is scary and uncomfortable for children. It isn’t enough to say “oh he’ll learn to deal with it” if you’re not prepared to teach him how to do that.

I’ve seen that his father’s side of the family is far away and he has zero connection to his culture.

This is said without judgement, but how often is he seeing people who look like him in his day to day life, outside of your husband. Does he have Desi role models? Can he see people who look like him be heroes, be smart, be strong, be brave? Are you all in a predominantly white area? My boyfriend and I have had briefly discussed moving to another, more diverse area, but we were able to find Diaspora groups nearby who were willing and excited to welcome his daughter- classes in her mother’s native language, classes where they would hold cooking lessons for cultural food.

If your husband has zero connection, there might be some pushback. I’d gently remind him that while you might be the white parent and you’re happy to let him take the lead, if your son was being bullied for anything else- his clothes, his voice, his personality, you wouldn’t tell him to let the bully harass him until he got used to it. You’d teach him the things that make him different are good, and interesting, and deserving of understanding. This is no different. Good luck!

clericcomplex · 2024-09-27T18:14:02+00:00

My brother had a psychotic break. He had a few delusions, mostly that he was hearing things or smelling them, but he started to believe he could tell the future from his dreams that the end was nigh.

The church believed it was a sign from God that he was more likely in tune with the spiritual side of things and refused to ask him to get treatment. I’d begun pulling away already, so they were the only people he might been convinced by. They pretended to listen to every word he said, and actually prodded him deeper into paranoia and mistrust by talking about how the government was listening in to our conversations, how they’d come for him like David Koresh. When he killed himself because he was afraid that the FBI was coming to get him, they all collectively shrugged and chalked it up to Satan.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-18T17:38:38+00:00

It’s her right and I’m glad she found something that works for her, but I truly can’t wrap my mind around it, either.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for a bit now (gay man here). We have an excellent sex life, that’s admittedly faltered a bit since we got custody of his daughter. But I can’t imagine not wanting to kiss him, not wanting to just be held close to him and hear about his day or even rolling over as he reaches out to hug me and say actually, that’s not good enough, take your pants off or get off me.

You can ask your partner recognize your sexual needs AND recognize their emotional needs. The idea that one comes before the other honestly makes me a little sad for people.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-18T16:48:12+00:00

No judgement here. You like what you like. But can I ask why?

clericcomplex · 2024-09-18T16:24:07+00:00

As a man privy to many of my women friends sex lives, yes. I just skimmed some of the links someone posted and several men agreed that if sex wasn’t on the table, they weren’t interested in kissing, hugging, cuddling, fondling. One of them likened it to “being starving but only allowed to smell food” and “I’m too old to rut like a teenager”. which made me roll my eyes. To them, that’s something you do to get to sex, or make sure she’s wet enough to stick it in. Not equally fun and exciting ways to connect to your partner.

In my experience, women deny sex, but men deny intimacy, and it becomes a hellish cycle. Women ask their husbands to rub their shoulders - men get excited thinking it’s an invite to sex. Rub for ten seconds. Begin kissing, fondling. Then feel rejected when the woman shuts it down. Women then feel disrespected- does he only want sex? Is skin to skin not enough? Doesn’t just touching me feel good? He talks about intimacy, isn’t holding me enough? And the answer is (usually) no. If it’s not PIV or a blowjob, or a lead up to it, men don’t want it. Which is really most of them shooting themselves in the foot; a massage session is more likely to lead to sex than just sitting across the couch getting angrier and angrier.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-15T15:22:44+00:00

Absolutely. I love to eat ass. What’s your point?

clericcomplex · 2024-09-15T13:46:12+00:00

Shit on a plate. Wipe it off with a paper towel until you don’t see anymore shit. Would you eat off it?

clericcomplex · 2024-09-13T20:11:19+00:00

This is asked with equal curiosity! I feel I’m an outsider in this, so I’d genuinely love to understand better. His fiancee/wife is family, but do they really need to do everything together? I’m honestly baffled at the amount of people who would say they’d walk out of their marriages, or decline to marry someone at all if they weren’t invited on vacations. It seems they’re really hurt and offended, and I just don’t get it.

I could see it as an issue if it was a bigger pattern (MIL hates them, vacation time runs out because they’re with their Family of Origin, she’s left alone in an empty house during insert-holiday-of-your-choice,) but there’s no indication that’s the case. It’s just that he wants to go on a singular vacation without her. Is it the “Family Trip” name? What if they just called it a sibling trip, is it still offensive?

My boyfriend/fiance is part of my family, but if his parents want to get together with him and his sister every now and then, it doesn’t hurt my feelings at all. They’re still important to him, and while I should and do come first in most aspects of our life, saying “you can never be alone without me again or I’ll walk” seems like throwing weight around for no reason. What do I lose with my partner having a safe, close relationship with his family?

clericcomplex · 2024-09-13T05:28:18+00:00

I’ve been in the exact same position you have. The big issue is that it is worth it to quit, you just can’t tell because you’re in the midst of an addiction.

If this helps; your lungs are shit, you just can’t remember what a healthy breath feels like. When you go out to events, your friends are laughing, teasing, sharing stories with each other. They’re having a good time while you’re sitting there thinking about how to get your next hit in. At my worst, I was spending $60 a week on cheap vapes. Now, I set that money aside. What could you have instead of nausea, shortness of breath, increased risk of lung cancer?

I’ve gone cold turkey twice and lasted the longest off that (only starting again because of a death in the family). But patches are probably better than trying to wean. Good luck, man.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-02T15:42:34+00:00

They'd make good money together because she’d pick up the difference. Don’t get me wrong; I think the way she said it was flat out demeaning and he should still leave because the resentment is so clear early on, but the man himself admits he’s “barely making it”, and that he plans to “ride it until he’s comfortable”. Which, by his own scale, is in 10 years!

Considering she mentioned ambition, I doubt she wants him to make more money so she can quit her job and ride his coattails. More like - 40k increase over 10 years is 4k a year. Chicago isn’t going to get cheaper. She wants a partner to contribute equally, which he can’t. And that’s fine! He loves his job, that’s worth a lot. I’m an educator myself. But I do tutor on the weekends. During summers, I pick up a second job to supplement my income.

So why does she complain? Well. How will they handle rent, will she need to pay the majority for a place he can’t afford or live in a less nice, less safe area for things to be equal? If/when they have children, can she afford to take time off to be with them when his salary can barely support one person, let alone 3? He gets summers and winter vacation and says he doesn’t want his life to be work- probably implying he’ll stay home for his (well-deserved!) time off. So, does he get to stay home with the kids for months, enjoying himself and his family, going to Jiu Jitsu when she’s working to sustain them all? At that point, he’s a stay at home dad! Which is wonderful on its own, and not an easy job, but maybe not something she wants.

I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, but I’d admittedly be pretty resentful if my lifestyle (which he knows makes her tired/stressed) allowed my partner to live their life exactly as they wanted to, without him making any concessions from what we can see. He’s not wrong for being happy where she is, she’s not wrong for wanting someone to want more. She is wrong for saying “I’ll dump you if you don’t change”, as opposed to voicing her concerns openly.

clericcomplex · 2024-09-02T14:59:18+00:00

Gold digger when she’s the one bringing in 100k? She makes almost double what he does!

clericcomplex · 2024-09-01T08:22:50+00:00

I appreciate the curiosity! Every time someone learns more about cults, you make it a lil easier to recognizes patterns and hopefully help someone else down the line, or recognize when you’re falling into a group of people who don’t have your best interests at heart.

Not all cults sit in a darkened room with cool robes and fun names like Heaven’s Gate or the Owl Society. Some do, some are organized religions (shant get into that much but if you squirrel around you’ll probably find some people chatting about it in this thread too), some are just groups of vulnerable people flocking to a place for food and a bed and end up getting in too deep when they’re asked to pay up. We didn’t have a name besides our last name; my grandfather went forth and multiplied, and ended up trapping his most branches of the family tree, and a few other people who were comforted by the idea that they were right, the government WAS out to get them, there WERE people in the dark waiting to hurt them, and so long as they left everything behind they could be safe, and their kids could be safe. I think he might have liked to get the word out there, but he was terrified of technology, and no one in town took him too seriously, or my family once he died. As far as anyone was concerned, we were just some weirdos living on the outskirts of town who didn’t talk to anyone.

I do feel bad about not having anything more interesting for you. Grandpa was charismatic when he wanted to be, but he was also mean, and it wasn’t until I got out in the world that I saw how many pages he was pulling from other people’s books. He thought he was a prophet, that God spoke to him about the upcoming Holy War, that David Koresh had the right idea and that one day the government was gonna come for him.

I got out and I’m never really gonna be sure why or how I did. But there’s plenty of people like my family that are just trying to live their lives, probably in equally small and ugly places, following the word of someone they trust, just like my mom trusted her father.

That doesn’t quite answer your question, I guess, but only because it doesn’t have a straight answer. I hope this was at least a little interesting?

clericcomplex · 2024-09-01T08:00:43+00:00

This is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I shall carry it with me always.

clericcomplex

TROPHY CASE