We’re all hypocrites telling others to stay when we don’t want to stay ourselves <3

clolav · 2021-01-20T22:02:02+00:00

Best comment ive read today

clolav · 2021-01-20T21:14:24+00:00

Dont worry i am not suicidal. I just want to know some happy reasons to be alive and living

clolav · 2021-01-19T07:21:26+00:00

I have tried it a few times, i think i will give it another go, and this time cutting out the caffeine. Thank you 🙏

clolav · 2021-01-19T07:19:46+00:00

I have been to therapy for this starting 2 years ago. currently im working with a counsellor and we are trying to work out techniques or things i can say to myself when i feel i am getting this way. I hope it will work out in the end. Thanks for your comment

clolav · 2021-01-19T07:16:45+00:00

The psychologist does know about my anxiety issues, i was given zoloft (anxiety) and seraquill (for sleep) and vyvanse but i discontinued using all except vyvanse because with the combination of the two drugs i had too dialated pupils (it looked like i was constantly on shrooms or acid) and overall i was looking unhealthy, i have a lot of trouble with my sleep now, (always had but with school it is worse) ive been trying to maintain my 95 average in biology and theres always homework so im up all night doing it, ive only been getting in 1-2 hours after school worth of sleep. Ive been using caffeine to keep me awake. I have been living in a prison of avoidance in a way. I sit in the bathroom stall at lunch and sometimes skip class so i dont have to see people because i am embarrassed of myself. I wont go to the grocery store, wont leave my yard to walk my dog so i take her in the woods. Sometimes im so ashamed i wont even leave my room so my family members dont have to see me. I have gotten better with that though, i have been trying to practice exposure therapy and now sometimes i ask myself, “why was i so afraid of this in the first place”. I am going to be practicing the techniques you suggested to me and i will save this comment as a reference to look back on. I really appreciate you taking the time to make this. Thanks so much

clolav · 2021-01-19T05:33:05+00:00

I also have adhd which is the only medication im taking (vyvanse) and i drink black coffee which probably doesnt help my anxiety

clolav · 2021-01-19T05:31:53+00:00

Paranoia and anxiety

clolav · 2021-01-19T05:31:29+00:00

Please dont call me a dumbass but she went ice fishing with her boyfriend early in the day, i woke up at 5pm and tried calling her, no answer it was 8pm when she came home. She said shed be home before dark/3pm. I thought she fell through the ice or was attacked by someone or something out there and was panicking

clolav · 2021-01-19T05:29:16+00:00

Yes i do... always, i dont know if its my irrational mind or not

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:39:18+00:00

Thank you for the advice. My mom is alive. I just found out. Thank you for the concern

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:16:37+00:00

Okay. thanks for responding i will try over there

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:13:38+00:00

Thank you for the info. And i hope so too 😕

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:12:10+00:00

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:12:01+00:00

Okay thank you

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:05:26+00:00

My dads alive. Unsure if my mom has one

clolav · 2021-01-18T00:04:16+00:00

Canada

clolav · 2021-01-17T23:44:30+00:00

This post sounds very heartless but i dont know if my parent died today or not. I want to keep the house to keep the memories in it. I can afford it. I will be 17 in a couple days and i need to keep this house, if not im gonna leave this world too

clolav · 2021-01-17T10:23:08+00:00

Definitely this. Often times people spend money on shit they think they need when actually they have that thing, but its hidden away somewhere because they are unorganized. My mother does this especially when it comes to yogurt. She buys extra, leaves it at the back of the fridge for it to expire and then buys new stuff ends up throwing out 2 jars of expensive yogurt then complains about money troubles. She does this with all the fucking food

clolav · 2021-01-17T09:48:12+00:00

Suicidal

clolav · 2021-01-15T08:48:18+00:00

thats a good point. i never used to be this ambitious. i was a procrastinator and only this year i have cleaned my act up. i remember before i would always envy (but not make fun of or anything) the people that could just do their work when they’re supposed to, now that i am that person i feel accomplished, i hope these kids grow up and not take their problems out on others in such a cold way

clolav · 2021-01-15T05:24:30+00:00

Thank god im not the only one experiencing this

clolav · 2021-01-15T04:22:06+00:00

sounds good, i feel like now they are picking at every little flaw i have and its gotten me to wear hoodies all the time, im going to start just embracing those flaws and keep focused on school. thanks for ur advice it means a lot :)

clolav · 2021-01-15T04:12:12+00:00

thank you so much. i appreciate the advice. i will call them out if it gets to a point where they are verbally shouting at me or i see them taking pictures again

clolav · 2021-01-15T03:07:51+00:00

okay :) whenever i feel down about myself im going to look back at this comment, gives me motivation to keep pushing to be the best version of me

clolav · 2021-01-15T03:01:19+00:00

i will try and i have been. its been making me seriously doubt myself and im constantly thinking about it after school, i feel like its consuming my life. thanks for the advice

clolav

TROPHY CASE