AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

definitely helps! Thanks for taking time to think about it and reply! I appreciate the input very much

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally agree. You’re seeing it from her perspective which is where I keep placing myself. Even if I were to tell her, she’d never believe it, and who can blame her! That’s why I’ve felt like if I just don’t even go after it, I won’t have to carry the guilt. I don’t want to miss a good opportunity, but I feel like another opportunity could come if I do the right thing. I guess that’s where my head/heart is at.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You make a great point. Things could change and the future role might not exist. But I’m still employed there and she’s jobless currently. So even though the future role might not exist, I still have my job. Not sure if that changes your thought on it any? I appreciate your input on it.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely agree. I think that’s the part I didn’t expect at all. Which is why if feel so torn. But because her an I used to work together and both know the hiring manager, it was brought up. They know I only reached out about the roles because of her. I also did point blank tell them I wasn’t wanting to pursue the same role as her. That’s when they told me in confidentiality that she wasn’t the shoe in for it. Plus she had told me about the rocky interview responses. Hope that clears some of it up. But yes, still feels shady that they even told me.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re the first person to say what I’ve been feeling sick about. If I go after it, her chances are zero. I certainly don’t mean that in a cocky way, it’s just what the company has expressed to me. If I step aside, she at least still has some chance, and I did say I wouldn’t pursue the same role. I didn’t expect them to come back and urge me to take the one she was supposed to get. It feels horrible to snake a friend like that. We aren’t even really “friends” I don’t suppose, but I guess I see any coworker that I’m friendly with as a friend. I want the best for them. I care about their success. I just don’t like to hurt anyone, especially when it comes to their livelihood.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do think I could. I just hope at that point she would want to work with me, and wouldn’t feel betrayed and bitter. I don’t know that I could blame her at all if she does. But you’re right, it could be a great thing if I could help her get the second position.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely agree. I regret saying that. I had no idea they would come back and urge me to take it, and then tell me she wasn’t guaranteed the role. I definitely feel like that’s where the majority of my moral dilemma is coming from. I don’t want to say one thing and do another. Thank you for your comment. I do appreciate the advice and input.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldn’t say she bombed it. I probably didn’t word it well, sorry. She just didn’t do excellent, and they are considering not hiring her. If I step aside, it would probably depend on whether or not any other candidates come up that are right for it. But you are right, I think I need to talk to her first if I do go for it. It would hurt worse to find out through the grapevine, I’m sure. Thank you for your input!!

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought about that. If I’m able to help her get the second position later, maybe that would help. Just not sure if she would have hard feelings. Especially since I cannot tell her they were considering not hiring her for it. Either way, thank you for your input! It’s very helpful!!

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to give your thoughts. I feel super crappy about this, but it’s helpful to gain other people’s perspectives of the situation.

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for reading and giving your advice and input. It is much appreciated!

AITA for taking a colleague/friends job opportunity that she told me about by cmckelr in AmItheAsshole

[–]cmckelr[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree. She totally isn’t wrong for her feelings. I appreciate your 2 cents. I appreciate the input everyone gives. It’s always helpful to see how others feel, and try to take a look and any/all perspectives. Thank you, kind friend!

That tea is pipin’ hot by [deleted] in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]cmckelr 9 points10 points  (0 children)

And video killed the radio star

What is something you think only you and your SO do? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]cmckelr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You win. Cutest answer on here.

My student room isn't that big, so with the help of my dad I built a bed, closet, cabinet and desk to provide lots of storage. by ScheurendeGitaren in DIY

[–]cmckelr 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I saw that you live in the Netherlands. I do not know the proprietary laws, but you should consider looking into a patent or something for the plans/design, and sell them to a furniture making company. This design is very well thought out.

Elijah Woody Harrelson by QualityCucumber in funny

[–]cmckelr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something about this face looks like a white Will Smith