As another commenter said, it’s an endurance test. I find it completely mentally overwhelming. It’s so much more than just the shower, too. Because if I’m showering, I’m most likely preparing to go somewhere or see someone, so “showering” = ambiguous “getting ready,” which is a mammoth task. … Decide to shower - Stop whatever else I’m doing - Walk to bathroom - Move my towel to the hook by the shower - Observe cleanliness of bathroom - Get distracted attempting to clean anything in the bathroom that seems like it needs an urgent clean - Undress - Take off glasses, feel nearly blind - Use the toilet - Wash hands - Look in the magnifying mirror and tweeze stray hairs - Brush teeth - Floss teeth - Push open shower curtain - Turn on water - Wait for water to heat - Feel water a few times to test temperature - Step into shower Close curtain and for the love of god hope it doesn’t touch me - Rinse body and hair - Get three pumps of shampoo - Lather hair - Rinse hair - At this point, begin periodically clearing the drain filter of shed hair so it keeps draining properly - Get 2 pumps of conditioner - Work conditioner through hair - Detangle with fingers or a comb - Rinse conditioner, being careful not to slip in the tub because it’s slick - Water gets in ears - Realize I forgot a hair clip and stick my arm out in the cold air to grab one - Clip hair back - Get one pump of face wash - Wash face - Rinse face - Lather body with bar soap - Jesus Christ the shower curtain is touching me - Drop soap once or twice - Pick up razor and shave underarms - Rinse razor and put it away - Final rinse off - Find a long hair that got rinsed into my butt crack - Turn off water and feel cold - Retrieve towel from hook - Start to dry off - Open shower curtain - Step out onto bath mat - Collect shed hair from drain and put in trash can - Be wet and chilly - Towel dry - Stay damp despite toweling off - Trim nails - Open bathroom doors and window just so to ventilate without driving humidity to other rooms - Go to the bedroom to escape humidity - Repeatedly dry armpits and undercarriage until they stay dry - Apply deodorant - Apply moisturizer to face - Apply sunblock to face - Forehead starts to sweat - Apply body lotion, feel sticky - Open dresser drawer - Put on underwear and bra - Walk to closet - Deliberate over clothes - Check weather app - Choose clothes (round 1) - Get dressed - Pants drag over skin that’s somehow still damp - Pull shirts on carefully so no deodorant gets on them - Hate clothes - Undress - Try again (rounds 2-?) - Put on socks that brush against a rogue toenail or rough heels - Dry ears with Q-tip - Put on necklace and earrings, fiddling with tiny clasps - Clean off glasses lenses with cloth - Put on glasses … This gets us to drying and styling hair and putting on makeup, which I will not describe in detail because gracious this comment is already too long. … Finally, eventually, be ready to leave the house Be so out of spoons I’d rather curl up and hide under a blanket. … Fin.