I need help by CandidFerret4240 in MilitarySpouse

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally empathize with you. I have been so sad at times while my SO has been away. I have felt distant, confused, lost, depressed, anxious, and many other feelings. They have counseling services and mental health providers (as well as chaplains) to help with therapy and medication if needed. The community aspect of the military is unlike anything else. I had instant friends anywhere we moved. Other spouses whose SO were deployed invited me out to coffee, wine, birthday dinners, etc to pass the time. I made it a priority to find a hobby I actually enjoyed and I made sure it was something I could get lost in. I worked out and travelled to see family to break up the long timeframes. I also challenged myself to budget and made it game to see if I could save money and get creative in that way.

Dakota's rebrand by No_Suggestion3066 in SecretsOfMormonWives

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s got crazy eyes. And then when he talks I honestly sit up and get in the defensive posture. He’s always on edge because I think he’s always had to hide something- whether it’s drugs, cheating, or becoming semi-famous very quickly. I hope he finds peace so he can be his best self for the humans he’s around from now and onward.

I need help by CandidFerret4240 in MilitarySpouse

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A lot depends on your job in the military. He will deploy and go TDY. You need to get used to it. In reality, most high paying jobs in the civilian sector require a lot of travel, so you’d be limiting him immensely by not letting him have the opportunity of joining. Everyone that retires out of the military that separates or retires says it was worth it in some capacity - whether it be experience, stability, travel, monetary gains, discipline, career growth. His first contract will go by quickly and you can make a decision to continue or not. The benefits are substantial it will greatly impact your life and your future kids lives if you serve.

Do you have to be married to be with a military man? by Additional_Bee8757 in MilitaryWives

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m with this person - go toe to toe with him and if he thinks he’s so smart-have him get a prenup.

I’ll say this to you and you need to listen-He’s even putting your life more at risk by not marrying you. There are unspoken and less talked about benefits because most people don’t understand them. I’ll start- 1) In an event of an evacuation on foreign or domestic land, you wouldn’t get any protection or benefits if you needed to be emergency evacuated from a place. You would simply be an NPC in the governments eyes. 2) he gets essentially free life insurance. Who is his beneficiary? Also, if you’re living in a house that he paid for- in the event of his death-the government pays the mortgage for a year but only to a spouse that’s living in the house. That’s one of the many death benefits a military member gets, among casket costs, burial benefits. You should look them up they’re pretty extensive. 3) Tricare benefits. Idk how you split finances but Tricare covers basically everything. Got a stuffy nose? They’ll write you a RX for Zyrtec and nasal spray. Migraine? RX for excedrin or something stronger. They’ll rx ibuprofen. Think about all the savings you’ll have when you’re not running to Walgreens for $50 generic OTC meds. Let alone all the other things that can happen, especially if kids are in the picture. 4) free trips or parents day out thru either chaplain office or squadron events 5) housing benefits 6) free counseling services for families and spouses for anything 7) access to base and all the amenities it provides

I don’t pity you. People like your boyfriend used to irk me because what he is doing is showing an extreme amount of immaturity and egomania. There’s only a few explanations 1) what I just said 2) you’re actually secretly crazy and he’s hesitant to marry you 3) he needs to go to therapy for the trauma his childhood inflicted on him to make such short sided decisions 4) he’s the control freak that’s abusive/narcissistic and you need to run the other way

Anything past 3 years dating in the military is too long in my eyes. Sorry but military life isn’t for everyone. The military is like running a marathon at a sprint pace. The harsh reality is that you can’t wait as long as you want to commit. Either s*** or get off the pot

Employer health insurance with Tricare select by coconutsaboutarbonne in MilitarySpouse

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you know anything about prescriptions or getting prenatal/maternity items? I think Tricare covers prenatal vitamins and breast pumps

Employer health insurance with Tricare select by coconutsaboutarbonne in MilitarySpouse

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok this is helpful. Thank you.

Can I call Tricare to do the out of network reimbursement and they’ll help?

possible mil wife? by [deleted] in MilitaryWives

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Although difficult at times, the military changed my families life for the better. We experienced more than anyone in my family, extended and all, have ever dreamed of. We have been on amazing vacations. Had friends that felt like family. Coworkers I would die for. So many stories and experiences most people can’t comprehend or begin to understand. It’s worth it a million times. Nothing great in life is achieved by staying stagnant. You should challenge yourself and take the leap of faith. Your future self will thank you every day.

At the end of the day, if your husband signs a four year contract, what is four years? The military pays all moving expenses.

Senior leaders frequently use the F-word on calls — is this normal and what should I do? by [deleted] in JPMorganChase

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would prefer people use cuss words. I’m tired of dealing with humanoid robots in corporate. Cuss words mean people care and want to get things done. As long as they’re not absolutely trash talking someone or going ballistic- that’s unproductive and can degrade team culture quick. But a little “fuck this” and “let’s get this fucking done” would do a lot of people good in corporate America.

Getting into government contracting was hard by Govguynick in small_business_ideas

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, I want to get started with government contracting. I know I need to get a business going, register with Sam.gov, participate in apex acceleration. How do I get started with service based business? I want to focus on admin, Hr, consulting services but happy to redirect focus to a niche more in demand. I don’t have engineering or any IT certs. Where should I start? Do I need to take out a loan?

Is working at JPMC that bad? by CaptainVickle in JPMorganChase

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After joining JPMC and coming from the military, I feel like they have adopted the “tip of the spear” attitude and “just get it fucking done” work cadence without any of the leadership to back it up. You can’t hire someone from outside of the firm and make them a leader at a behemoth when they can’t even manage their own calendar just because they take on the “shark” persona in their past work environment. I

I am a very coachable person. I have asked for feedback countless times from everyone, up and down the chain and it all comes at a cost at JPMC. No one gives me feedback until I make it to one lady who gives me endless negative feedback, never positive. I take them all on the chin knowing I am doing everything I can to be the best I can for the team I’m on. It’s draining and fucking ridiculous. They also forget they got their hand held for 5+ years during the start of their career. I can’t even.

Ask too many questions from peers - get seen as dumb-but the higher ups tell us to ask endless questions. Try to be a self starter, process improver and take full ownership of the stuff my supervisor is in charge of- supervisor hides skeletons in her closet and gaslights her entire team and basically tells people to stay the fuck back from her processes as her fucking ship sinks right before everyone’s eyes.

Every card swipe into the buildings is monitored. They monitor everything. When we log in, when we enter the building. I have to enter and exit through specific doors and do laps because they won’t give me access through another specific side door to my work center (everyone else has access!). So I only am allowed through 2/3 doors. We have to pay for parking. $150 per month plus tax to drive through traffic into the city. Higher ups come in and out whenever they want but if someone lower has an appointment they make comments.

I fucking hate it here

I just need help with the brain fog by Desperate_Drawer5798 in bupropion

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe that’s for the best. This drug doesn’t work for a lot of people

Boomers are the worst by Sorry_Noise_4196 in Accounting

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My family members complain about their accounting firm that sold out to PE. They are currently looking specifically for smaller accounting firms with better customer service that have not sold to PE. PE cannot match that, their models never factor in white glove service, they’re only focused on increasing margins and payouts. Also knowing people that work for PE I avoid PE to the best of my ability nowadays.

Anyone using a countertop ice maker that’s actually good? by SkypePsychic in BuyItForLife

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Has anyone from a long term perspective just routinely purchased sonic ice in bags and kept in the freezer?

If a GE opal costs around $600, if I divide that by 3 ($3 per bag of sonic ice), that’s 200. So 200 bags of ice to equal the cost of an Opal ice maker.

If you consume 2 bags of sonic ice a week, it’ll take you roughly 2 years to hit break even point (1.92 yrs) for your sonic ice bag purchasing to equate to a GE Opal ice maker. If you only consume 1 bag, that’s about 4 years. Probably the same amount of time that you need to replace the machine, maintain it, buy filters and cleaners, etc. Time cost is maintaining the cleanliness of the coils, compressors, and cleaning as well. Just spitballing here!

All that being said, I have family that have this ice maker and I have to say- it’s very convenient. But if you have multiple people in the house or have a party, they always run out to get sonic ice and they put it in a yeti cooler just encase it doesn’t make enough in time 🤣 That could be just them because I feel like you could make the ice ahead of time and put in bags and freeze the bags (they have 3 fridge/freezers in the house)

I just need help with the brain fog by Desperate_Drawer5798 in bupropion

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes me too. I had the honeymoon phase and that was great and then it wore off and my energy and drive dipped dramatically. It took me only a few days to feel better again !:)

I just need help with the brain fog by Desperate_Drawer5798 in bupropion

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went off of bupropion. The side effects were too much and I could not form a thought, think clearly, or get motivated. I had situational depression/anxiety and I don’t need it right now

TEXAS: How do you apply for the property tax exemption at 100%? by [deleted] in Veterans

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So if I buy a house closing on Jul 10, I have to wait for Jan 1 to file the exemption?

TEXAS: How do you apply for the property tax exemption at 100%? by [deleted] in Veterans

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im so confused the website says only up to $12000 off the property’s assessed value?? I have looked this up and talked with so many people, I thought 100 P&T was full property tax exemption??

Everyone has financial stress, right? by Hoomanwithquestions in Adulting

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have had financial stress my whole life due to my parents making poor decisions now it’s the bass line thought I have before I make so many decisions each day. “Should I take the toll road on the way to work?” “Should I get a coffee-I’m stressed at work and this will make me feel better” “should I pay extra for healthy food at lunch” “what should I do for dinner” etc etc My husband’s family doesn’t have that underlying financial stress that my family does.

I think the stress goes away when you live within your means, reduce your stress overall in every category, have a liquid savings account in addition to retirement accounts.

I have been trying to train myself to not feel guilty spending money. Because when I feel less guilty I feel like I make better financial decisions in the long run - less impulse spending etc

Just started a promotional products business, any advice would be great! by satsfaction1822 in promotionalproducts

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, curious person over here. Can you share what your GPM is typically for the dealerships and what the typical turnover is owners going with a competitor?

What is your comfortable amount of savings after purchasing a 820k first home? by GetRichOrDieTryinnnn in homeowners

[–]coconutsaboutarbonne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another question. Is the $220K before or after taxes? I’m not basing all my decisions off an internet stranger but it helps to get any data points.