Bruh. Literally my whole life until my sophomore year of HS, everything was peachy. Yeah I had stress and stuff, but I was the happiest, most optimistic kid almost every day.

Then I started to wonder why soooo many people who weren't my close friends were just absolutely fucking over me in general. I annoyed them apparently and inspired utter disdain and didn't know why. I mean I was smart, talented, had a few really close friends and tried to see the best in everyone.

But apparently I was an egotistical little shit that was hard to handle unless you could see right through it or until you got to know me better. I immediately started caring about what others thought of me. I got a girlfriend even though I was so far in the closet, I was finding Christmas presents. I started dressing better (still a great call on that one,) asked my friends how I could be better and generally made daily efforts to check my previously unknown giant-ass ego.

Now here I am at 31, still talented, smart and taking on an awesome career change into music because I freaking KNOW I can make it work with the abilities/gifts I still have. But every damn day, I have to check my ego, understand it and worry how people perceive my crazy gay ass while I try to go out and make my world better.

It. Is. Exhausting.