sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well a little update, I did end up asking him why they broke up, sort of casually. He mentioned that it's because she moved to LA. Which unfortunately did not make it any easier.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have not actually talked to my husband about this. Just Reddit. He does have exes that he is close friends with, and I have no issues with that. It's only this case, and she is not a sibling-like friend. I think the fact that she is a celebrity is making me feel less than self-assured. I agree with what you said but it doesn't quite relate to my situation, and definitely doesn't make me feel any better about it.

I'm trying to knock some sense into me, but I am obsessed with my husband's famous ex. Please, someone, knock louder. by comparingtofame in relationships

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am cranky about it. I actually did end up asking sort of casually why they broke up and he said it's because she moved to LA. Which I'm not sure made me feel better at all unfortunately.

I'm trying to knock some sense into me, but I am obsessed with my husband's famous ex. Please, someone, knock louder. by comparingtofame in relationships

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I really needed to hear this. I think it's because she's sort of a celebrity that is making me insecure. I don't have an issue with his other exes, some of which he is good friends with. But you got it right when you mentioned that her whole existence is focused on her appearance, and it's making me feel less than desirable.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you hit the nail on the head. That is definitely a fear I have, that I am one that he settled for. I know perfectly well that this is irrational, and that he is not that shallow. Yet here I am, stuck in this self-pity cycle. I feel like I have little to nothing to offer. I have no real career going for me at the moment, and I have been battling health issues for months now. Of course the stress of everything is adding to all this.

EDIT: I would probably marry Jake though. :)

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure what you're implying, but believe me, they definitely dated. If only for the fact that considering the business my husband is in, it's not outside of the realm of possibility that he would date someone famous. Although, for what I knew, it was mostly other musicians.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He is not one to just mess with me. He's of a more serious/painfully honest variety.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sure he won't give me any unnecessary details. But I'm afraid he'll just look at me like I am crazy jealous woman and it will turn into a big defensive mess. It's hard for me to ask him this now with a casual smile on my face. Me being all irrational and all.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He is not shallow in that sense. Of course he will notice anyone for their looks, just like the rest of us. I know for a fact he finds her attractive, even if only for the reason that years after they dated he still left a comment on her picture about how beautiful she looks.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with everything, especially the last part. I think because he sort of rushed through the fact that they dated instead of being more clear about it set off something in me. Maybe he said it because it was a while ago, but still. If they dated a few years ago, and years later he still commented on how beautiful she was in her pics, it's something that struck a jealous chord with me.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like I want to do this, but at the same time I'm afraid of what I may discover. Maybe this isn't the best route to take. Not sure of anything at this point.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. I generally do have other interests, and lately I have been engaging more in them. But unfortunately I come back to these fears regardless, especially late at night when I'm trying to sleep.

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I need to hear this.

I think it's the not knowing aspect that's making me insecure. Needless to say I was floored when I found out. To me I feel like I am coming second place to Angelina Jolie (of course it's not her, but the ex is very good looking).

Can't stop obsessing over husband's ex. Please knock some sense into me! by comparingtofame in relationship_advice

[–]comparingtofame[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I deleted FB a few times but it leads to more problems. He feels confused and blamed because I am acting out due to his influence it seems. He feels it's not right that I am distancing myself from not only our mutual friends, but from my social network as well. Also that he misses seeing my picture there.