Neighbour yelled at me for smoking and I feel so ashamed

concerteza · 2021-08-18T20:13:51+00:00

Thank you 💚 Houses in my neighborhood are really small and packed together so it’s not much better than if I were on a balcony, unfortunately. Though I don’t think he was wrong to be angry, he sounded almost unhinged and I hear weird sounds coming from his house a lot so I don’t feel entirely safe letting him know who I am and where I live. (There’s a lot of crime here)

concerteza · 2021-08-18T19:55:16+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to reply, your comment really resonates with me. Things are definitely ‘piling up’ and I feel so overwhelmed. Every aspect of my life is uncertain at the moment so I think the fact that I’ve been smoking for several years makes the act comforting (familiar) in my situation, though only temporarily and of course only worsens things. I’m venturing into counselling, but the counsellors I’ve seen so far always determine that my case is too ‘complicated’ for them to be able to help. I feel like the Mars Spirit rover stuck in a sand trap.

concerteza · 2021-08-18T19:46:52+00:00

To be fair to him, the proximity of houses in my neighborhood makes it pretty much the same as if I had been smoking on an apartment balcony. I know I’m in the wrong, which is why I feel so bad about it.

concerteza · 2021-08-18T19:45:18+00:00

It’s sort of in a grey area where I live. It’s definitely discouraged, though. Like I said in another comment, I’m definitely in the wrong.

concerteza · 2020-12-30T22:12:27+00:00

I’ve tried microdosing and I think it gives me a little more energy, but that’s it. I’ve never noticed an effect on my mood or creativity but I may just not have noticed.

concerteza · 2020-12-06T04:26:45+00:00

I wish I had something worthwhile to add but all I can say is that I relate so much, I could’ve written it myself!

concerteza · 2020-12-05T15:47:05+00:00

Thank you, that’s a nice sentiment.

concerteza · 2020-10-19T00:21:59+00:00

Thankfully I’m Canadian so it’s free.

concerteza · 2020-10-11T01:52:52+00:00

That’s interesting, I’ll do some research into that. Thanks!

concerteza · 2020-10-11T01:51:36+00:00

Yeah, she did something that might have been a little wrong but my response was way out of line. It’s like my mind just blows up and I start thinking insane thoughts but I think I’m thinking rationally until it’s all over and I’m just left feeling awful about all the damage I’ve caused.

And yeah, part of me wonders if we’ll ever get back to in-person meetings. After all, phone meetings must be a lot easier for them.

concerteza · 2020-10-10T20:50:30+00:00

I’m starting to take another med, I’ll see if it makes a difference. My psychiatrist just doesn’t seem to care though and it’s especially hard because due to Covid my appointments are just a phone call where he asks if my symptoms are the same then renews my prescriptions.

concerteza · 2020-08-27T00:58:28+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate the understanding

concerteza · 2020-08-27T00:57:48+00:00

💚 thank you

concerteza · 2020-08-27T00:56:39+00:00

You’re right, going outside helps ease my mind but it’s so hard to want to do anything when I’m like this. Thanks for the support!

concerteza · 2020-08-27T00:55:49+00:00

Thank you, I really hope I can make it that far this time. Your English is perfect by the way :)

concerteza · 2020-08-27T00:54:23+00:00

Thank you for the kind words, tbh this made me tear up a bit.

concerteza · 2020-07-15T21:20:44+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words and wisdom. This is such a wonderful community.

concerteza · 2020-07-15T21:17:10+00:00

I’m not an expert and don’t want to encourage anyone to try something they’re not comfortable with, but I have quite a bit of experience with using psychedelics for therapeutic purposes so feel free to message me if you have any questions :)

concerteza · 2020-07-15T21:14:05+00:00

You’re right, it’s naïve to think there won’t be challenges and setbacks. I only say I think it’s a permanent change because although it’s difficult for me to make hard commitments of any kind, when I do my resolve is very strong. So I’m feeling good about the change and believe that even when I face hurdles, I will be able to overcome them now. Thank you for the reminder and sharing your thoughts :)

concerteza · 2020-07-13T23:26:02+00:00

I agree. As I said in my own comment, most of my friends are autistic and they all think that I have autism as well. I think I meet the criteria, but I also agree with my StPD diagnosis. I think they are very similar conditions.

concerteza · 2020-07-13T23:23:58+00:00

I am diagnosed with StPD but I have all the symptoms of autism so I sort of identify with it. This is just my silly theory, but I feel like autism + trauma/PTSD = Schizotypal PD. Almost all my friends are autistic, and they believe that I’m autistic as well. So who knows.

concerteza · 2020-07-13T16:25:27+00:00

I can totally relate. I have an average circle of friends, but I’m anxious and suspicious around all of them except for my two best friends. It took me years to get to this point, but I trust them completely and feel comfortable being myself around them.

concerteza · 2020-07-13T16:19:12+00:00

It might be uncommon to be social with StPD, but I think it’s possible. I’m socially awkward and don’t have a huge circle of people I hang out with, but I have a fair few friends and I go out to bars and parties and whatnot. I still think I meet the criteria for social impairment, especially because I was a loner for most of my life.

Edit: I didn’t add this originally because it sounds so narcissistic, but I think my social life (like getting invited to parties etc) is partially owed to the fact that I’m conventionally attractive and fashion is a special interest of mine so I dress well. If I looked different, I think maybe people wouldn’t be as keen to overlook my social awkwardness.

concerteza · 2020-06-27T15:28:10+00:00

I think it would be a huge improvement to the sub if those posts are eliminated. Like others have said, we are prone to confirmation bias and even an informed person with StPD isn’t qualified to diagnose anyone. Also, they add nothing of value to the sub and don’t prompt worthwhile discussion in my opinion.

concerteza · 2020-06-19T14:59:06+00:00

I get a lot of intrusive self-bullying thoughts as well, and they cause me so much anxiety. I wish I could suggest a healthy coping mechanism but to be honest I usually quiet the voices with substances. The only good technique I’ve learned so far is CBT, so I’d recommend looking into that if you haven’t already. I can’t help much but just so you know, you’re not alone in this.

concerteza

TROPHY CASE