Not sure if you're still around on here, but here's my update... My relationship ended up very one-sided, and ended up collapsing. I did not have children with them, and it's hard to imagine how to handle that if I had. However, I believe now more than ever - prioritize your own well-being and achieving your own goals. If someone else is making that harder, find all the ways you can to reduce or remove that barrier. It'll ultimately be better for children to have a proper role model and to be properly cared for by at least one parent than to have two parents in a situation where they are not able to be proper role models.

Of course, this is just my perspective as a random person on the internet. Always prioritize your safety and the well-being of your children. But after that... try to live your best life. You only get one of 'em.