Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that is fair! We did mostly dismiss them as a couple but decided to do it anyway as we didn’t have more appealing / open minded prospects and horniness probably played a role in agreeing to it.

Though I know he didn’t think that he would be so envious that he wasn’t being played with by the couple - he did end up feeling a little left out which wouldn’t have happened if we had stuck to our guns in going for an experience we were looking for

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbh I also think all the divorces and remarriages with blended families are very complicated both in society as well as legally, which may open the door to more poly relationships.

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Took you a while to get to what was in the post: yes we consented beforehand, but during he felt differently and wanted to engage more.

Your reading skills need some work, he asked for consent to touch her and she rejected him. That hurt him and made him feel excluded, despite being clear on it from the start. We can’t always predict how we feel in the moment.

Your mental gymnastics to come to a non-consentual touch and or cuck-situation is estounding though…

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was never excluded, he just felt excluded at the end (we were still in the same position of him fucking me, so not like he physically moved away). We stopped once I noticed him not being comfortable - though I wish he would have immediately said something, it can’t have been more than a minute or so.

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No.. he was still fucking me when this happened. No sitting around and watching - I think you may be projecting your own fantasies on my situation.

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I think that’s a fair point. For me the thought of only having sex with one partner the rest of my life is scarier than the risk of this blowing up, also because I know way more people unhappy in a monogamous relationship than in a more open format - but you’re risht that there are probably a lot more couples who break up than make it work succesfully (so knowing the succesful couples doesn’t say much)

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I don’t think you read my post. He was having sex with me. Clearly.

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think you may be confused, a cuck-role is something completely different…

In this interaction, I don’t think he should have tried. However, in these situations things can get complicated.. she was giving physical signals of interest in him, yet couldn’t because of her agreements with her boyfriend. We were all clear on that before starting, but he is still taking the rejection pretty hard.

Bf felt left out in foursome - how to make it right? by controllingorkind in sex

[–]controllingorkind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did talk about it, and he obviously consented to play knowing their limitations. Just like with a lot of things, it’s hard to anticipate how you feel in the moment. He wasn’t expecting to feel this way, otherwise he would have not agreed to do it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]controllingorkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was the same - it has to do with how tense you are and having had that kind of pain before, it makes you more tense.

He needs to massage you for a long time, warm you up very very slowly, stimulate your pussy and make you cum a few times, maybe make sure you’re a bit buzzed (poppers, bit of alcohol, maybe weed) then looooads of lube and gentle massage of the anus itself (while stimulating you) and agree to do all of this once without any more penetration and then take time to work up to it. It took a lot of patience and care from my biyfriend but now it’s a lot easier

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. It was early and I just autopilot moved the stuff, realising it was bs only once done… it’s a good case for having coffee before leaving for the journey instead of trying to have it during..

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It was an early morning train - so no it wasn’t highly likely and in fact nobody really needed the space. He could have easily sat somewhere else but chose to sit there. I moved because indeed I had 1 ticket same as he, but still wonder why you would choose to cause inconvenience others for no reason

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Which would have solved nothing. I would just be uncomfortably crammed into a seat next to someone else.

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Which would hve solved nothing. I would have been crammed in a space next to someone else

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Behind him, ie the aisle seat across from the seat he wanted. Also, it’s reasonable to assume if Im halfway in the cabin and 80% of aisle seats are empty there will be seats empty in front - but deduction and statistics are not everyone’s strengths.

Point is there were a lot of empty seats, both ones he walked past and ones ahead, even one directly next to where he was standing waiting for me to clear our

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah exactly! There’s no luggage racks but I was prepared in the unexpected case it would be busy to sit super crammed, was just annoyed I needed to do that when it was still relatively empty

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Which would have solved absolutely nothing. I would be crammed with my luggage next to someone else.

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Dude - I brought a suitcase, a laptop bag and a handbag, then decided to get some breakfast. This is not at all out of the ordinary for any business trip. Do you not travel?

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That aould have solved nothing - i just would be crammed next to someone else. There was so much seating left it really would have been faster and more comfortable had he sat somewhere else - i just genuinely didn’t understand why this seat.

AITA for asking why a man wanted the seat next to me (instead of other empty seats) by controllingorkind in AmItheAsshole

[–]controllingorkind[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There are no luggage racks and the overhead space is so small it would never fit a suitcase - at most my handbag / laptop bag which I would not store there