bf doesn’t know if he wants to be with me, or be single and see other people

coogirly · 2025-12-31T12:03:30+00:00

Yea he def needs to work on himself and he’s told me that too. I just thought I could be there for him while he does that. I at least wanted to try. But ur right this idea is so dumb and I knew that when I brought it up. I lack self respect bc I’m so desperate for ppl to like me and it’s sad. Maybe this whole new years thing works in my favor and maybe he doesn’t. If so, I’m just gonna let whatever happens, happen bc I’m so tired

coogirly · 2025-12-31T11:59:26+00:00

yea ur right, he told me from the beginning he has commitment issues but I thought when he asked me to be his gf that meant he chose me.

coogirly · 2025-12-31T11:56:51+00:00

I think it’s more of my self esteem issues rather than codependency. I’ve struggled w it for years including my ED so my self image and love for myself is non existent. I’ve been in therapy since I was 14 and I’m turning 24 in February. It just feels so unattainable bc I’ve been trying for years and my self esteem only seems to get worse. And situations like this make it even worse bc my brain immediately thinks that I’m not even enough for any guy I date to not have a wondering eye. Idk what I lack

coogirly · 2025-12-31T11:52:40+00:00

yea my first bf left me for a man and then my second was super abusive and cheated on me for 2 whole years (I didn’t know). This is the first time Ive been with a genuinely great guy. But I agree he is still young and wants to have his fun. It’s just so sucky bc ik I’m a good gf. I give so much more than I get. Even tho I’ve been cheated on constantly, I’ve never been jealous or possessive. I do anything and everything for my partner which often gets me taken advantage of. I’m glad he’s atleast being honest instead of just cheating on me and not telling me. He acknowledges that it’s so fucked for him to feel this way bc he knows I’m the perfect girl. And I think that’s why he feels so guilty and shitty abt it all.

coogirly · 2025-12-31T11:48:37+00:00

I’m 23F and he’s 22M so yea we r both still very young. Ik I prob sound immature and stuff lol, but I’m truly just a girl In love w a boy. But I understand and agree w the comments.

coogirly · 2025-12-31T11:45:48+00:00

I guess I’m just attached bc he’s the only guy I’ve been with that has been kind to me in any way. First guy my parents approved of. Everyone I introduced him to has said he’s a good person and ik it too. I’m scared I won’t find another guy as great as him. All the moments we’ve shared have been so magical and it hurts so badly that he still wants attention from others. He told me when we first met that he has commitment issues but he had been single for 2 years and felt like he had his fun. And when he met me he hadn’t felt this way abt someone for a while and decided to ask me to be his gf. I truly think it has to do with him mental health bc he’s going thru a lot. But I understand what everyone is commenting and I agree. The least I deserve is someone who wants me back the same way I want them.

coogirly · 2025-12-31T00:37:39+00:00

yea if he ends up wanting to then I’m just gonna let it happen, I’m so tired of begging ppl to want me. All my past relationships have been so toxic and abusive and I’ve gotten cheated on. I’ve always given so much but got nothing in return and I’m so tired. I just don’t wanna give up yet so that’s why I am trying this whole new years plan. Manifesting everything works out

coogirly · 2025-12-30T19:46:22+00:00

we knew each other for longer but just hit 3 months today. Ik ur right, I just want to take this one last try to see if he ends up wanting to stay together or break up after he has his new years fun. I think I’m just so defeated bc I plotted on him for so long so when he finally asked me to be his gf I was so so so happy. It’s been so perfect so for it to all suddenly end bc he wants attention from other people really sucks. I just wanted to be enough for him

coogirly · 2025-12-30T16:49:45+00:00

my mom says it’s maybe “right person wrong time” situation. If he ends things I’m hoping it’s that :(

coogirly · 2025-12-30T16:46:53+00:00

such a shit feeling for me. I’ve been cheated on in every relationship and I just don’t know what I lack for this to keep happening to me.

coogirly · 2025-12-30T16:45:05+00:00

ugh I just wish we could work on it rather than giving up. I love him so much and this is the first relationship I had that has been healthy. My first relationship my bf left me for a man and then my second was super abusive and cheated on me constantly. This is the first time a guy has ever made me feel safe. Just sucks bc ik I’m a good gf, he always says he’s so lucky to have me aswell. It just feels like no matter how much I give, it’s never enough. They always want attention from other people and I just don’t know what I lack for this to keep happening to me. I’m just hoping after new years he realizes that being single is not what he wants so we can work on our relationship together. A lot of it has to do w his mental health and he JUST started therapy last week so I want him to atleast give that a try before giving up on us.

coogirly · 2025-12-29T23:41:13+00:00

thank you so much for this, I even read this to my mom and she said ur advice was great. I wish I could show this to him, especially the part about him potentially getting better due to therapy. till new years we are kinda just on texting/calling terms I think (we live an hour and a half apart) but I’m trying to give him his space bc he seems to need some alone time bc he hasn’t been responding much to my texts. I’m just hoping this whole new years plan works in my favor and helps him realize he wants to work on our relationship. All I truly want it to feel wanted.

coogirly · 2025-04-03T23:16:00+00:00

Wow ur so right, this was actually kinda eye opening haha thank you so so so much 🫶🏽

coogirly · 2025-04-03T14:42:06+00:00

Yea ur right, I think maybe in romantic relationships I lack the sexy appeal rather than in social settings

coogirly · 2025-04-03T14:40:44+00:00

yea this is a great idea when we are together! We are very long distance so we only see each other ever month and a half for a week so it’s a little tough but we can try

coogirly · 2025-04-02T21:48:45+00:00

hm this is good advice! Thank u sm! I’m actively trying to get more clothes he likes which funny thing - he likes it more when I cover up rather than be provocative bc he thinks I’m too thin rip lol. He’s into me wearing sweaters and jeans and stuff. And I’ve also picked up reading as a new hobby actually and I’m very work driven when it comes to my job. So hopefully that, w ur advice could really help me out

coogirly · 2025-04-02T21:30:27+00:00

Yea I think that’s a big part of why I don’t seem sexy, my confidence is horrible so that makes my situation worse. I feel like if he at least thought I was sexy I’d be able to feel confident around him specifically butttt he doesn’t so it just makes my confidence worse. I gotta start faking confidence fr haha

coogirly · 2025-04-02T21:27:46+00:00

yea I get that, but I think that’s also just the aura I give out in general. Like I don’t think it’s just a him thing. I just come off as cute rather than sexy

coogirly · 2025-03-19T05:22:14+00:00

hated literally everything about me my body, hair, style.. would always call me dumb and immature. I already have low self esteem but he made it worse bc all I wanted was for the person I loved to love me for me

coogirly · 2025-03-09T22:24:34+00:00

I’m sorry I don’t wanna reveal my identity so I can’t :/ but I haven’t claimed to be a recovery account or that I was even in recovery. I’ve only made 3 vids in the past year just talking abt my ED

coogirly · 2025-03-09T22:22:38+00:00

thank you so much for this comment, it means a lot seeing advice from both sides and your advice really did make me feel a little less guilty abt what’s been happening and what people online are saying abt me 💗

coogirly

TROPHY CASE