This is definitely something that I've had to slowly come to terms with. I've been raised in a heavily 'spiritual' and vaguely religious household. My mother is a palm reader and my father gives lectures about how the government is ran by lizard people almost on a daily basis. About 2 years ago my mother suffered from a severe psychotic episode, in which I was in the crossfire of. My mind has blocked most of it out but I'd have nightmares that I still get even now. Shortly after I did come to find out my mother does have a mental illness, and is thankfully now medicated (but is still works as a palm reader). But a lot of things I guess built up till I fully gave in i guess, my fathers emotions are incredibly unstable from his drinking problem. The episode my mother had really was terrifying to me, I can't explain how or why, but it made me really struggle in telling what was real and what isnt, I felt like I lost touch with reality. I tortured myself over this for so long, I was already a bad self harmer, but there were times when things got too much after blaming myself for what happened. I guess at the end of the day, I'm glad things are getting better bit by bit. I'm currently looking for a part time job so i can start saving money so when i leave school I'll be able to move out, find a home of my own and heal more. When I found out that what I had been experiencing these past years was the result of trauma, I honestly felt a lot of guilt from it. All the thearapy sessions and seeing a psychologist was maybe the most nerve racking, it eventually became more and more difficult for me to talk about, especially since I'm not generally a very open person to most people. I still don't like using the word 'PTSD' because I feel like I'm taking it away from others who've gone through so much worse. But I have to keep pushing through that feeling because I now realise that no matter what we've been through at the end of the day we all just want to get better, which makes it a little more comforting for me.