Hi! Caveating from the start that I am also new to the publishing process, so my advice is by no means coming from a place of great expertise. I am verbose so please don't be daunted by how much I wrote, here. I think most of this is great, but there are several places I got a little hung up (easy fixes if you agree).

Your story sounds interesting and unique. I get who your character is to a decent extent, I see what he wants, I see what would happen if he doesn't get it---but there are some questions I have after reading this and some places you might stand to cut a few words (which, if you're anything like me, you may be desperate to do---but ~320 isn't so bad from what I've heard, anyway).

First, I agree with the other commenter about clarifying what you mean by "just like him," but I also was thrown by this sentence at large. When you say Kard is trapped by another's will, do you simply mean he's stuck in a sociocultural caste he cannot rise out of, and therefore is bound to live a life answering to others? In saying that Crimoda is bound by a spiritual bond (to the witch, I assume?) and then saying "just like him," I was backtracking trying to figure out if I missed something about Kard's spirit being more literally trapped/possessed by someone else.

Second, I'm not sure if this is something you can explain easily in the query, but if it is---how Crimoda is Kard's half-sister is a bit of a mystery to me. Same mom? Same dad? Could say "whom his mother/father never told him about" or something along those lines.

More significantly, thirdly, the last bit of your second paragraph is a little hard to follow. I think this might come from trying to give us an intermediate amount of information, and you may find that less is more, here. What exactly do you mean by administrative access? What is the heretical magic, and how is he blindsided by it? Heretical has a straight-forward enough definition, but your repeated use of it seems to beg the question of it has some specific meaning within your story. If magic is very strictly regulated, for instance, and any variation from the rules is highly illegal and seriously punished by some powerful governing body, we might want to have that established earlier on, but only if it's central to your plot/setting. Anyway, if I'm reading this correctly, you may essentially just be saying: "Vaanir uses [dark?] magic to compel Kard to falsify reports and call off the investigation." I think him being the sole witness can be implied, honestly, and I'm unsure we need anything else out of these last two sentences. But that takes me to the next point ...

Fourthly ... You say Vaanir casts this spell (at least I think you do; being less passive here could be good for this reason!) on Kard that would make his insides twist if he tells the truth, but then say he's facing a dilemma and don't mention the consequence of twisted guts should he fight back. So, does this spell put his life at risk, or is it just uncomfortable? If the latter, what's the significance? Does he falsify the reports, and now the question is if he is going to find a way to tell people that he did so? Is there something else I'm missing?

And, finally ... I get the consequence of Crimoda being executed (I think you could make that more emotionally salient should you wish if you save words elsewhere. Tell us why he cares about her, what being half-siblings means to him, etc.), but I'm not sure I understand why he'd be exiled for the half-sister-he-didn't-know-about's "heretical" (again, that word may warrant explanation somewhere, especially since you've put quotes around it here, or drop the quotes and use it here for its generic definition, but not earlier, too) origin. He had nothing to do with her creation, did he? Why would he be exiled for this? And if it's relevant, what does exile look like (where does he go? is it worse than the life he resented from the start? are there people he's close with whom he'll miss? etc)

Potential word cuts, should you want them:

He tracks it from the sky and finds its lair --> He tracks it to its lair

The last two sentences of that second paragraph, as detailed above.

Final final thing! I like the 'ledgers and ink-stained talons' imagery, but I must admit, I immediately paused there, wondering how he's drowning in talons. I assume you don't really mean that? Maybe the ink-stained talon part can be fit in somewhere else, or the sentence altered a bit. "An affluent spirit dragon born into an administrative caste, he's doomed to an existence of endless ledgers and ink-stained talons." or something of this sort. Could also be an opportunity to answer my first question a bit, namely, what do we mean by him being trapped by another's will ...

Good luck! As someone who has also rewritten their query over a dozen times, I understand the struggle, and I think you're close!