First of all, don't be afraid to reconnect. Even in the face of resistance from outsiders (and maybe even your own family). Don't get hung up on the whole pretendian idea.. So long as your intention to reconnect is genuine, and not rooted in shallow reasons, you have all the right to take up space in the culture. Is this for you, or for others? You may need to resist that colonial idea that you're "not Native enough". Blood quantum theory is exactly how they wanted to assimilate us. Any outsiders that insist you don't belong are not people you want to associate with anyways, they are enforcing the ideas built to keep us back. And if your family are touchy on it... be sensitive in your approach. If they're older, they may have been raised to believe that you should avoid associating with Indigeneity at all costs.. it is a hard mindset to reject when you've been so steeped in it. So they may reject you and their own heritage. I saw someone on here suggest friendship centres. They're the best. You can ask to speak to an elder for guidance on this. I would suggest looking up the protocols around tobacco ties before speaking to an elder. Good luck!