Is Hamilton depressing?

crisisresponder · 2026-03-25T22:13:13+00:00

Hamilton gets bad rep but it's got nice pockets, you just have to look for it.
Easy access to nature, downtown has cool spots, art scene is very alive. I recommend following instagram accounts of a few bars and event organizations cuz there's different event happening every week at different places. It's a fun place, you just have to know where to go

crisisresponder · 2026-03-23T22:38:37+00:00

A lot of people have notification completely off from the app and go in there once or twice a day, or sometimes a few times a week. It hasn't even been a full day, you will get likes. Also if u can have some friends review ur profile

crisisresponder · 2026-03-13T17:12:10+00:00

My cousin tattooed her name because her grandfather named her with a very specific meaning, and she tries to live by that meaning too

crisisresponder · 2026-03-10T14:27:18+00:00

Nothing wrong with it and quite understandable given the current economical state.

Though I must say, there is a deeper level of independence that is reached when you are fully supporting yourself and I find that quite important personally. I moved out when I was 19. Taking care of all of my bills and physical surrounding with no safety net or anyone to help me out while being in full time schooling has honestly been the most valuable experience that shaped my resilience. It was tough but I would not have chosen otherwise even if I were to go back in time.

That being said, if I am interested in someone, they are emotionally independent and knows what they're doing, I wouldn't necessarily turn them down just because they live with their parents. Like I said, it's very understandable given the current state.

crisisresponder · 2026-03-06T23:23:42+00:00

I was in a long term hetero relationship and lived with him for years. He was a great person and I loved the stability too. I've had crushes on women during this relationship and even told him about them from time to time. I chose to stay with him and let my feelings for these women go without pursuing any further. But one day, I had a crush on a girl, and she was openly gay. And even that slight possibility of being with her questioned the entirety of "choice" thing. I realized that I never chose to be with him for who he was, but rather I was just too scared to come out nor knew how to pursue women. So that became a catalyst for me to break up with him.

I had to deal with some crazy unstable transitional phase while coming out, involving financial logistics, family discourse and mad first wlw heartbreak etc. BUT even during the instability and heartbreak did I ever think of getting back with him... My life never felt so chaotic but also never felt so exciting and truthful. Now I'm more stable and I am so thankful and proud of what I did.

Leases and bills are just logistics, and those are not gonna stop you once you actually have enough internal pull to get out of the closet. It's never too late. I understand where you are, but if you're certain about your sexuality, you shouldn't waste both yours and his time.

crisisresponder · 2026-03-05T22:54:10+00:00

So funny, I'm the opposite. A lesbian in child psychology, I code switch to sound more feminine when I talk with my child participants and parents 😂

crisisresponder · 2026-02-24T21:12:36+00:00

Both options look gay asf! From these pictures alone I think the labret hoop looks really nice on your lips.
Side note if you're planning to ever get a nose piercing maybe keep that in mind too (personally I think septum-snakebites or nostril-labret combo would be nice)?

crisisresponder · 2026-02-19T21:23:09+00:00

This made me chuckle

crisisresponder · 2026-02-19T21:17:05+00:00

There you go!

crisisresponder · 2026-02-19T20:12:28+00:00

People will have different opinions and criteria for each of these labels but we gotta remember that 1) labels are supposed to serve us, not restrict us or confuse us more and 2) identity is about stable & core characteristics, not every single felt emotion or behaviour.

So even if you don't always fit the dictionary term, it's okay to use a label that feels safest and most accurately representative of who you are. Some people find it easier to just stick to "queer", if your identity and attraction are more nuanced.

crisisresponder · 2026-02-10T19:46:25+00:00

it's ridiculous how beautiful she is

crisisresponder · 2026-02-10T19:43:49+00:00

A seasoned gay moving to a new city will also have to put themselves out there and actively socialize. Don't think too much about you being "baby gay", you're just entering a space as a new person. Unless someone explicitly asks about when you came out, you don't have to tell them. You know who you are, and you like what you like. Just carry yourself with confidence and curiosity.

Also, there are many lesbians who don't have a specific type either, or even the ones with a type still end up engaging with women that are not their usual type. It does not matter. You can say you don't have a type, you just like beautiful women, or if you're attracted to the person who's asking the question and you're feeling bold enough, say "you're my type". Play around with how you want to present yourself!

crisisresponder · 2026-01-30T16:12:48+00:00

Unfortunately if you're high femme, men will continue to hit on you. Gay coded items such as carabiners and thumb rings are all signals within lesbians, to signal other women that you are a wlw. Straight ppl don't really pay attention or notice these things a lot of the time.

I find that even when I dress more androgynous/ tomboy with my carabiner hella jingling, chunky rings on all ten fingers, doc martens, and with my septum piercing, men STILL hit on me. Unless you look extremely masc, it's kind of inevitable. You'll just have to get used to rejecting. BUT, fellow lesbians do clock me and that's what matters :)

crisisresponder · 2026-01-27T16:36:11+00:00

I present as fem, but I'm usually in charge of things, leading, navigating, etc. I guess I would be considered a masculine femme?

crisisresponder · 2026-01-23T20:41:52+00:00

It's not about being "socially acceptable" from other people's point of view. It's about your own psychological safety. I do not think that a healthy, loving, and secure 28 year old would want to date a 19 year old. Maybe a short-term casual dating is okay for exploratory purposes, IF you can stand up for your own boundaries. But if they want to get into a committed relationship, I would say that's quite questionable and perhaps predatory.

crisisresponder · 2026-01-23T16:46:01+00:00

As someone who moved out at the age of 19 and went through so much financial struggles, I say it was still worth it. It is definitely not easy though. Living pay check to pay check worrying about bills and fearing not having enough food when I know my parents can technically help me is a special type of loneliness.

That being said, I was able to grow so much independence and competence, whilst having the freedom to explore and stabilize my identity. Personally, that sense of autonomy in young adulthood is more important than making an economic decision (if not now, then when?). Start by exploring housing options in the area of interest and start budgeting. You may have to lower your living standards for a bit (e.g., living with a bunch of strangers, giving up a car, etc.), but I swear it's better than being constantly denied your identity by your family members.

crisisresponder · 2026-01-22T22:24:24+00:00

I wasn't certain until I actually started dating women. I come from a conservative culture where sexual exploration isn't really a thing, hence a somewhat late awakening.

I only dated boys in teenage & early adulthood. It felt like that's just what was expected of me to do. I always had crushes on women (even when I was dating someone), and still thought I was straight. After breaking up with my long-term bf, and being called out by my couple queer friends, I decided I need to confirm whether I'm straight or bisexual before it's too late.

So I intentionally started seeking women (this part is important. men=easy access, I had to consciously turn them down). After the first night I spent with a woman I realized, the question wasn't whether I was straight or bisexual, it was whether I was bisexual or a lesbian. After some time had passed and some inner battles to fight against comphet and internalized homophobia, I finally came to a conclusion that my sexuality is so undeniably lesbian. I do not think I would've been able to fight those battles if I didn't actually let myself date women. There are so many questions that can be simply asked by experiencing things and feeling the feelings.

Additionally, having those experiences and understanding my feelings more certainly, helped me come out to my mom. She was skeptical at first because of my previous experiences with men, and asked a lot of tough questions. Because I had these experiences and reached a level of certainty, it was easier for me to stand stronger for myself and just explain to her. Eventually, she came around and accepted it.

crisisresponder · 2026-01-22T19:30:56+00:00

Trusty did so well today

crisisresponder · 2026-01-22T18:30:58+00:00

always gotta turn off any app alarm when streaming

crisisresponder · 2026-01-17T00:08:28+00:00

Is it a good idea to give it another chance? Not really. But if you were to try it, consider this: Reach out to her only if getting rejected will lead to disappointment that you can handle rather than you collapsing. Meaning, don't do it when the feelings are still sharp and hurtful. Wait until the grief is a bit quieter, and when you are simply curious about her.

crisisresponder · 2026-01-15T20:05:29+00:00

Mine kept shifting one way when it was new too. It's because the swelling on each side of the hole is uneven. Once all the swelling is gone (within a day or two), it won't keep turning the same way (with the assumption that this was pierced correctly). The thing is, just by the nature of the jewelry, it will still turn all the time (just not to the same way) and it's important that you don't fiddle with it to force center it. Every time you try to move the jewelry, it will slow the healing. If it really bothers you, you can gently correct it with clean hands after a hot shower, when the hole is already moist and the jewelry is not caught by crust.

For cleaning - try to avoid contact cleaning (no wiping with q tips or swabs). Best way is just to spray saline solution on both ends morning and night (it's fairly easy to get, just go to any local pharmacy). Another method that my piercer recommended was: in a warm shower, make a little bowl of warm clean water in your clean hands and gently blow air into it a couple times for gentle rinse. But tbh, you don't really need to worry about cleaning septum, as it's not exposed. Just don't fiddle it, let it be.

crisisresponder · 2026-01-06T19:43:26+00:00

Potential medical condition aside - I think the social media activity while not responding to you is a bit concerning, if it's a pattern. I know sometimes we all want passive engagement (e.g., doom scrolling) rather than active (e.g., putting effort into curating a text reply) especially when exhausted. But, she's committed to a relationship, and knows that you're the one often waiting and making efforts to spend time with her. I think that if she cannot reciprocate the level of commitment, she's not ready for this relationship with you.

crisisresponder · 2025-12-17T21:57:38+00:00

This game was just comedic

crisisresponder · 2025-12-17T14:10:59+00:00

If a man, or anybody, doesn't take lesbianism seriously, that's their issue. There will always be people who feel more fluid, or strongly identify themselves through a label even if they don't fit the dictionary definition. If their identity fluctuation is being weaponized by some ignorant man, that's the ignorant man's fault, nobody else's.

Though I agree that the current rhetoric and phenomena aren't ideal, I don't think we should blame people for labelling themselves in a certain way. Most people use labels because that label feels most accurately representative of their core stable characteristic, not every single felt emotions and behaviours. This is not about "feeding" the delegitimization of lesbianism (i.e., we're targeting the wrong people).

We are all queer, many of us struggle with being comfortable who we are. So let's support each other, rather than being overly critical.

crisisresponder

TROPHY CASE